Most days I say too much. You already knew this about me. The other day after a particularly long day, I found myself sighing. It was one of those long, heavy, somewhat pathetic deep sighs that tell the world you’re having a hard day.
I didn’t mean to sigh that loud. Or maybe I did. Whatever the reason, it was loud. So loud, that my girls heard the sigh even though I was jamming out to a Bon Jovi song.
“What’s wrong, Mom?” Ella asked.
I forget 5 year olds – especially my 5 year old, soak up everything.
“Oh Ella, I’m OK,” I told her through my sigh. “It’s just, well, life is hard.”
I wasn’t sure if there was a lesson coming from my words, or if she was even listening. But at that moment, right after that loud sigh, hard was on my mind.
“Mama, why is life so hard?”
Good question.
I’ve had hard moments in my life. I’m sure you know the ones, too. But this hard is different. I wear a few different hats in my life – as most women do. I love them all. It’s why I wear them.
Clearly we aren’t talking about hats here – but, I think you get the point.
Of those hats family comes first – always; but the job is often in the back of my mind. One job in particular takes up most of my thoughts and truthfully, most of my time, too.
Her View From Home.
I’ve told you guys about this before. Maybe you read it daily? I hope so. I love it. My business partner and I started it nearly two years ago. Last week we had our highest growth yet.
We were thrilled!
So why the sighs?
I’ve castrated pigs, I’ve lugged heavy television cameras around while wearing very high heels, I’ve served cocktails to rather unpleasant people and cut cattle carcasses. Those hats were hard. But this is so much harder.
This takes everything I’ve got.
In the past two years, my business partner and I have learned a great deal about owning and creating a business from scratch. Guess what. It’s hard.
I’ve been a small business owner for a very short amount of time. These years have opened my eyes and my heart to all the small business owners in this great nation. I am amazed at the farmers and ranchers and boutique owners; the small town grocery store or the local machine shop. Anyone who turns the lights on each day and shuts those lights off each night, works harder than you and I may realize. Even the big wigs, the guys at the top – I’ve earned respect for them, too.
My business partner and I hold all those titles for our small – but growing gig. Being responsible for our own happiness is hard enough – but having to manage a team of happy is more than I expected. Creating rules and guidelines, growth and success is, yes – hard.
You see the theme?
When my 5 year old asked why I thought life was hard I could only respond with this simple movie line that my husband repeats to me on a weekly basis.
“Why do we fall, Ella?”
“So we can learn to pick ourselves back up,” she smiled.
We fall, we fail, it’s hard – because it has to be. Only the tough survive. It’s how my father’s farm has stayed in the family for 113 years. It’s why the small business down the road just celebrated 40 years. It’s why, I believe our business will continue to grow.
I’m not going anywhere – even though it’s the hardest thing I’ve done.