Her View of 50 Shades

24 May, 2012 at 7:26 am | Written by: Jen Sill

Disclaimer:  This post may include quotes and thoughts not all members would be comfortable reading.  We want to open discussion about this book to everyone.  If you do not want to read passages from this book, please see Heather’s post about why she would NOT read 50 Shades of Grey.  It is first.  You don’t have to read further. If you’d like to read about whether Jen or Leslie liked the book you can read past Heather’s post.

 

 Heather’s View: 

By now everyone is talking about it, either they are for it (most are it seems) or they are against it.

To me, 50 Shades of Grey is just a book. Is it harmless? NOPE—I think not.  Reading changes our lives, quite literally. Words woven together in a novel story impact our hearts, our minds, and causes a ripple effect.  Even researchers and psychologists say that reading has a sizable impact on our hearts and minds.

So why won’t I read the book 50 Shades of Grey? It starts with the genre itself, Erotic Literature: (hang on ladies, this may make some of you blush—if it doesn’t, I know a good therapist): Wikipeida says:

it comprises fictional and factual stories and accounts of human sexual relationships which have the power to or are intended to arouse the reader sexually. Such erotica takes the form of novels, short stories, poetry, true-life memoirs, and sex manuals. A common feature of the genre are transgressive sexual fantasies on such themes as prostitutionorgies,homosexualitysado-masochismcross-dressingincest and many other taboo subjects and fetishes, which may or may not be expressed in explicit language.

So what’s the big deal? Why am I being a killjoy?

Because words have the power to speak life or death into any and every situation (I’m a christian author for crying out loud). And because we, as women, are wired to forge relationships beginning with our minds and emotions. Meaning, if it’s okay for me to read this book, then its okay for my husband to read a porn magazine. Neither of which are acceptable in our home, I’m raising a teenage daughter at the moment—need I say more?

Just because it’s the latest craze doesn’t mean I should hop on the band wagon.  

And now I’m getting on my soapbox, stay with me.

I won’t read the book just because curiosity has gotten the best of me (Ever heard the catch phrase “Curiosity killed the cat–just saying?).

I won’t read it because everyone else is.

It doesn’t mean I’m a goodie two-shoes. To be honest and open, I love the lord God very deeply and this type of material is offensive in his eyes… It cheapens our sexuality, our intimacy and trashes our minds. Besides keeping my mind and marriage bed pure, another thought: These are not the values I want to set for my children. Ephesians: 5:3-7 says,

 “But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a person is an idolater —has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God’s wrath comes on those who are disobedient. Therefore do not be partners with them.” (The Message Bible). If you are really curious check out this song that sums up our choices:

As a new Christian who hates rules and boundaries, I understand that our minds are the battlefield; and boundaries are necessary in keeping my life from being cheapened or jaded for all that God has intended for me. Then there is those who say I need to read the book to draw my own conclusions and understand the plot behind the story—I can draw my own conclusions without trying it.  The scripture above makes it clear of the reasons why I should not read the book, as well as God’s reasons behind it.

Besides, wouldn’t you  rather read something that is encouraging, uplifting and makes you want to cheer on the victor in the stories? I’d rather be watching Fireproof, reading One Thousand Gifts by Ann Vosscamp, or making my own memories with my husband (I bet my family is cringing now). I’d rather be passing on a legacy of family values that are wholesome.

Ted Baehr, the publisher of MovieGuide says,

“Those who have been born again see God’s providence at work. Those who do not have eyes to see are subjected to the influences of the world—a world where the mass media of entertainment spins reality to conform to its preconceptions, values and desires.”  My goal is to raise children who are godly and it begins with the example I set for them at home. So if you understand and don’t judge me AWESOME! If you don’t have the same views, that’s okay too. We are all on different paths and right now, this is where God has me—without that book in my hands.

   So with that I leave you with my favorite prose of words:

Summing it all up, friends, I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies. Philippians 4:8-9.

 Final Disclaimer: It gets graphic from here. Scroll to the bottom for the contest rules.

Jen’s View:

The hype got me.  I have to admit I don’t read many books.  I’m a stay-at-home mom.  I’m usually running kids somewhere, changing diapers, fighting for nap time or picking up the latest general mess in my house.  BUT, my husband whisked me away on our first-ever childless vacation last week.  Leslie had just posted something about the book on “Her View From Home’s” Facebook page and an argument exploded over whether the book SHOULD even be read.  Then, some friends messaged me that I’d be missing out if I didn’t read it.  Other friends e-mailed me saying it might heat things up in the bedroom.  So, I thought I’d give it a shot.  I tried the library and was, like 125th on the reserve list.  I tried a couple stores that were sold out.  All the time my interest was piquing.  A friend offered me hers — before she would even read it — and I was set to drive to another town to pick it up.  Finally, a day before my vacation, my local Target received a shipment.  Yipee!!  I ran to the store to buy it and safely packed it in my carry-on.

This book started out as ‘fan fiction’ from the Twilight series.  I don’t know too much about fan fiction.  However, the last books I had read were the Twilight trilogy (loved them.)  And right away I saw the similarities.  The first quarter of the book could have been ripped straight from the pages of  Twilight.  Anastasia Steele and Isabella Swan could be the same character in many ways.  Both think of themselves as mousy young girls hiding out in the shadows.  They are unaware that they actually turn the heads of almost every man in their lives.  But they’ve never even thought of any man until they meet a greek-god of a guy who is just wrong for them.  In Twilight it is Edward – a centuries old vampire.  In 50 Shades, it is Christian, a young, extremely wealthy, but totally messed up business tycoon.  The men fall for each heroin for reasons they can’t explain, but try to stay away.  The men even warn both girls that they should run.  Of course, they don’t.

5o Shades of Grey takes a major turn away from Twilight at the end of Chapter Six.  (I can almost turn to the page one quarter of the way through the book.)  With this quote (just know I warned you before you read on.  This is your last chance to get off the train if you’re uncomfortable with the f-word or sexual stuff.):

“Does that mean you’re going to make love to me tonight, Christian?”  Holy s***.  Did I just say that?  His mouth drops open slightly, but he recovers quickly.
“No, Anastasia, it doesn’t.  First, I don’t make love.  I f***… hard…”

Yup.  My face was flush in the airport as I read the line.  I lowered the cover of the book in case anyone around me was judging.  Gulp.  “Here we go,” I thought.  And here we went.  We went graphic. We went pornographic.  And we went far beyond my comfort zone.

Christian proposes that Anastasia becomes his submissive.  He shows her his ‘playroom’ with a vast collection of floggers, canes, paddles, and other S&M sexual toys.  After the tour he asks for her signature to show consent.  She reveals that she’s a virgin.  He decides to introduce her to “vanilla sex” before she signs any contracts.   The book does go in to great detail about the couple’s sexual exploits.  Here’s another uncomfortable (but not the most uncomfortable) passage:

“He moves his finger in a wide circle, stretching me, pulling at me, his tongue mirroring his actions, around and around.  I groan.  It is too much… my body begs for relief and I can no longer deny it.”  I let go, losing all cogent thought as my o**** seizes me, wringing my insides again and again…”

Hmmm…. I never thought I’d type anything like that. . .  That’s about a 7 on the scale — 10 being the most explicit passage in the book.

I haven’t read ANY books describing sex, not even a ‘heaving bosoms’ kind of book.  This one goes in to EXTREME detail.  I’d say pornography could be used to describe the pictures she paints.  Some call it “Mommy Porn.”  Only a couple of the ‘adventures’ are BDSM.  After the first shock, I think I was desensitized by the book’s descriptions.   If you cut that all out, you just have a simple story about a nice girl falling for the wrong man.  There really isn’t much else to it.

I can’t say that I couldn’t put it down.  I am happy that I read it so that I could draw my own conclusions.  I would like to discuss it with some of my good girlfriends.  The sex is selling.   SEVERAL of my friends have said they don’t usually read, but they’re on their second 50 Shades book.

Some have said that it may glamorize abusive relationships.  Christian does like to ‘spank’ Anastasia for such things as rolling her eyes.  I can see the point there.  However, the psychology is VERY different for an actual abusive relationship.  There is a lot more cold, hard fear in an actual abusive relationship.  The feelings of needing to help the abuser are there.  However,  Ana has a lot more control in the story than an actual abused woman would have.

The ending is a bit of a cliffhanger.  I hate that in television shows, movies and in books.  BUT, I think I’ll read the second book (when I find the time between potty training and toddler fits.)  I understand that it raises the question of nature vs nurture.  That’s an argument that fascinates me.

The bottom line is aside from the S&M, it is kind of a boring, slow moving book.  But I’m glad I read it.  And I’ll probably see the movie.

 

Leslie’s View:

Um, how do I keep this appropriate?  I’m getting red just thinking about what I’m going to say.  So, um, yea, right… so, “50 Shades of Grey” is making me blush.

Seriously.

Blush. 

I’m blushing!  Are you?  You should be.  I mean, unless you have the same type of “room” and mind like Christian Grey.  If that’s the case you’re probably saying..

“Pssh…that’s nothing.  Guess what I do in my room?”  And if you’re saying that, well, I’ve never met you before.  Or maybe I have and you keep your crazy sexual ‘stuff’ to yourself.  Please do keep it to yourself – I don’t want to know.  

You see, I’m only on chapter 12.  CHAPTER 12!!  It doesn’t even get graphic until chapter 7.  (Frankly, the first 7 chapters were boring and I found myself wondering when the good parts would happen.)

Um – they happen.  QUICKLY!  I’m not sure they could even be qualified as good parts.  Educational?  You bet.  (Let’s just say this isn’t something mom and dad would teach during the ‘birds and bees’ chat.)  

But good – eh? 

Pornographic?  Yes.  I think that would suit just fine.  

I’m pretty naïve.  Honestly, I don’t even know how the author could create such words in her mind.  In comparison, my sex life is relatively calm (yes mom, dad and husband of mine – you can cringe now) and frankly, I’m pretty happy about that.  Just reading the words make me tired.  I’ve often found myself thinking…

“Geez – they’re doing it…again?!”  Take a break.  Go play Scrabble.  Eat a hot dog.  Scratch that.  Eat a pretzel.  Yikes – scratch that too.  OK – don’t eat, but take a break already.”

I’m not one that takes life too seriously.  I don’t think you’re a ‘crazy sex addict’ if you read this book and I don’t think you’re a prude if you stay away from it.  To me – it’s just a book.  Period.  A book with naughty words, a few crazy unidentifiable objects and a very sad man, sprinkled amongst a relatively slow story line.

Will I forge through to read the other two books in the series?  Of course I will.  It’s what I do.  If the world is talking about something, I want to be in the conversation; I want to come up with my own conclusions.  Plus, I’ve had a good friend of mine tell me the 2nd book is better.  And, it’s pretty hot – in the “what the heck did they just do” kind of hot.  Although, I prefer romance – thank.you.very.much.  ;)

Will it take me a while to finish?  Probably.  When I have free time, I would rather watch an episode of “The Wonder Years” or “Mad Men” on Netflix with my guy; yes – that sums up our wild and crazy nights.

Should you read this book?  It depends.  If you’re the type of person who is easily offended, I’m going to go ahead and say STAY AWAY!!!!  If you want something unique to chat about with your girlfriends during wine night, then yes, forge through.  For me, well, these words won’t shake my faith, won’t make me think of other men/women/or inanimate objects, it simply won’t change me one way or the other.  To me – it’s just words; words that have now made one author really, really rich.  If it’s more than words to you, you should put the book down and walk away slowly.

If you do pick it up, be prepared to find yourself blushing – even if no one else is in the room with you.  

Trust me – it’s a wild ride.  (Pun intended.)

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83 Comments

  1. Ashley
    May 24, 2012

    I plan to read the book. I am like 85th on the waiting list at the library so it may be awhile! I usually read more of the Nicholas Sparks or Jodi Picoult books but think I have to read this one because of all of the hype from the media and friends who have read it.

    Reply
    • May 24, 2012

      Ashely – I’m all about Nick too! (we’re on a first name basis) – he is my favorite! ;)

      Reply
      • May 24, 2012

        Nick eh? I love his book Walk to Remember, my fav.

  2. Jennie
    May 24, 2012

    Ashley – That’s what I thought, too. It seems a lot of people are jumping on the bandwagon. If you don’t win the book here, check at Target every now and again. They get shipments in pretty often to keep up with demand.

    Reply
  3. May 24, 2012

    My interest has been piqued since I first saw one of my friends mention it on Facebook. It is on my list of “to read” this summer, between moving and the rest of my list…I just have to find a copy, so this would be perfect to win. I don’t mind reading books that are considered to be risqué…I would rather read them and then put the kibosh on discussions in my high school classroom before they get started!

    Reply
  4. Kathy
    May 24, 2012

    I have already said that I will not read this book. I initially said that because it offended me as a writer because the writing is so bad! LOL Partly it’s because it IS so popular that I don’t want to jump on the bandwagon. I was never a Twilight fan – never read those either. Plus, I don’t really want to read about or watch other people’s sex. Yes, I AM a little bit of a prude, I admit it. I prefer romance with implied sex in it. I don’t judge anyone else for reading it. If it trips your trigger and inspires you and your spouse to get closer – more power to you!

    Reply
    • May 24, 2012

      Kathy–right there with you. I don’t think its being prude. It’s more like, “if you’re friends were jumping off a cliff, would you?” type of thing. Plus I have other reasons.

      Reply
  5. Valerie Oliver
    May 24, 2012

    I would read 59 Shades. My sister and a couple friends are reading it so I am anxious to read it also so that we can discuss. The quotes Jen added in her review that didn’t shock me at all. I was expecting something really crazy, I will probably be disappointed when I read it because there is so much HYPE out there; then again with all they hype – how could it not peak your curiosity??? I hope to learn at least one new trick or two to try with my husband!

    Reply
    • May 24, 2012

      LOL – Valerie! There are a few things in there (so far) that I’m like….hm, that’s interesting. And then a few things that I know I would stay away from! ;)

      Reply
    • Jennie
      May 24, 2012

      Valerie –
      I thought alot of the stuff was ‘vanilla’. But there were some parts with floggers that I think I’d stay away from!! Can’t wait for you to read it!

      Reply
      • Valerie
        May 24, 2012

        I don’t know what a flogger is! LOL I’m guessing that means I’d stay away too.

  6. Jennie Nollette
    May 24, 2012

    I have to admit I am a sucker when books have a big hype surrounding them. I know I should form my own opinions and not go with the crowd but this book has me very curious. I have a vacation coming up so I am tempted to read this on my trip. Would be even better to win it! ;-)

    Reply
    • Jennie
      May 24, 2012

      Jennie – It was great for my vacation. Did it steam stuff up? I think I’ll never know. I think we were pretty ‘steamed up’ anyway. We were away from home, dancing at a wedding and having some drinks. ;) Plus, we knew no kids would be waking us at 5am.

      Reply
  7. Konni
    May 24, 2012

    To be honest until reading this post/review of the book I hadn’t even heard of it. I guess I should come out from under my stay-at-home mom of 3 rock a little more often, but if its not advertised on Disney or Nick Jr. I sadly have probably not heard of it. Now if you want to talk about Cuddle Uppets or Pillow Pets or Stompeez I’m your girl, my 6 year old has the commercials memorized and sings them word for word OFTEN. After reading the reviews though I must admit I am curious about it and would read it, between trips to the park, picnics in the yard, and Wii dance parties in the living room :)

    Reply
    • May 24, 2012

      Konni – I just heard about it too! SAME way – we’ve been watching too many cartoons. ;) Funny how quickly life changes when it’s all kids – all the time. In a good way, though. ;)

      Reply
    • May 24, 2012

      I would much rather be spending time with my kids and husband that way, then have my nose stuck in a book.

      Reply
  8. Alison
    May 24, 2012

    I’ve heard the book is quite racy…and this post proves so! On one hand I’m interested in it based on the discussion of “fan fiction,” how the book got published and it’s lightning fast rise to stardom. On the other hand I’m interested in it based on the discussion of our increasing progression toward a hypersexualized society. And of course, I can’t argue for or against it unless I read it so I guess it’s ok to throw my name in the pool for the fifty shades of grey book.

    Reply
  9. Aliisa
    May 24, 2012

    Heather – I liked how you explained your “view”. I thought you got your point across very well. I also agree with Kathy when she said “Plus, I don’t really want to read about or watch other people’s sex.” I think there is also a desensitizing aspect to it. The more you read, watch, etc… about certain things the more it becomes ok. Look at previous generations and then look at today. It doesn’t take much to realize we live in a far more sexualized society than are parents’ generation. Before you would never find swear words on t.v. and now they frequent many of the shows. My observation.

    Reply
    • May 24, 2012

      Right there with you Aliisa. Thanks for expressing your views. There is so much desensitizing and fantasy, it takes away from experiencing real life to the fullest.

      Reply
  10. Kelly
    May 24, 2012

    I heard about this series a long while back in a writing magazine I read, and then I started hearing about it everywhere! I have about 200 books on my to read list and I am in 2 book clubs, so I just haven’t gotten around to reading them yet.
    My mom read the first one and said the writing was not great. As an aspiring fiction writer myself, that alone was what delayed my reading of the series. But as a writer the more you read the better writer you become, so I will eventually get to reading them.

    I will pretty much read anything, with the exception of books that are really scary ( I have way too good of an imagination and get awful nightmares) or books that are about children or animals getting hurt or abused.

    I figure if I can handle books written by Chuck Palahniuk I can read 50 Shades of Grey. :) (His books, Fight Club and Survivor are two of his books, aren’t erotic. But he is all about the shock factor)

    Reply
  11. Mandy
    May 24, 2012

    I want to read the book and after reading your post I’m even more interested now. I’ve always like books that make every one talking.

    Reply
  12. Rachele
    May 24, 2012

    Honestly, as a “beginner reader”, I love hearing about good books through others…be it the media, facebook, friends, etc. So, after hearing about 50 Shades of Grey, of course I wanted to read it! I like to read different types of books to make me a well-rounded reader and this is definitely a new category for me. Like Mandy’s comment, after your post, I’m way more interested in reading it!

    Reply
  13. Teresa Marie
    May 24, 2012

    I’m a 51-year-old nurse, married for thirty something odd years with our only child grown and gone. I read the first one and am well into the second. Most everyone I know has finished all three books within one week. My first thought is it’s a fun, easy read. If you want to be a high falutin book critic and point out that there is barely any character development, there’s a boat load of repetition (makes it easy to skim, imo), and do I really need to know EVERY time Christian unwraps that condom wrapper of his? – then there is ample material to pick apart this series. I mentioned to a girlfriend that I wish I could have been E L James’ editor. You could seriously take this story and beef up its literary content and believability. That being said, I loved the book. I believe we all on occasion can benefit from a mindless trip to fantasyland, imagining ourselves in another life completely different from our own. And since we are using our imaginations, why not have this experience be with the hottest, richest man in all of Seattle who can fly his own helicopter, sail his own sailboat, buy me a new car, laptop, phone, wardrobe, etc.., and top it off with some raunchy hot sex? Throw in a little mystery and give this masculine man an underlying tenderness and vulnerability, and I ask you, what’s not to like? We read to take us away from our humdrum daily rituals. Would I rather read about someone like myself? Absolutely not. I’m drawn to how other people live and think and suffer and survive. When you consider what exactly is the reason you read and for most it’s to escape, to learn and grow, and to be entertained. Some things just aren’t meant to be overanalyzed. This book is one of them. Just have fun with it ladies! ;)

    Reply
    • May 24, 2012

      Love it, Teresa! ;) Agree – and yes, why do they have to tell us each time he unwraps a condom. That’s good and all – but yea, we get it. ;)

      Reply
      • Brandi
        May 24, 2012

        I completely agree with Teresa! It’s an easy entertaining read! I’m about half way through the second book and I’ll probably read the third. Is it appropriate to read this while sitting at the public pool this summer?! Lol just kidding!! Think I’ll stick to the privacy of my own home for this one! :)

    • Jennie
      May 24, 2012

      SO true about the wrappers… and the “Oh my!” line. Geesh.
      But I also agree that it is fun for me to walk in a character’s shoes sometimes. I love my life, but I love imagining I’m somewhere else sometimes, too. :)

      Reply
  14. Sanae
    May 24, 2012

    My 19 year old babysitter was looking for a book to read and asked me if I had heard of Fifty Shades of Grey. Yes, I have read it but my answer to her was “NO NO NO NO, do not read that book! It is NOT for you!!” Even though I couldn’t put it down, I didn’t care for the book. I have been encouraged to read the entire series because it gets better.

    I think this book as corrupted me. I see floggers everywhere! On some of my bags and purses, curtain tiebacks, dog toys….everything looks like a flogger to me now. If you are wearing something that looks like a flogger, I will probably try to hit you with it. But not in the secret garden area!! :) Sorry, couldn’t resist. I posted this link on my mama’s virtual bookclub facebook group and it’s worth a watch if you want a good laugh of Ellen Degeneres reading from Fifty Shades of Grey….

    http://youtu.be/on3JCwnwHbU

    Reply
    • Jennie
      May 24, 2012

      Sanae, you crack me up! I love reading your comments and posts!! (I also love Ellen). Thank you for making me giggle!!

      Reply
  15. Andrea
    May 24, 2012

    I have read my share of romance novels (think Danielle Steel) and am always open to read new authors. Since I first heard about this trilogy I have been wanting to read them and it would be even better to win a free copy. Thanks so much for giving us your honest opinions!

    Reply
  16. Mandy
    May 24, 2012

    I am not a big reader, but I am interested in seeing what the hype is about this one!

    Reply
  17. lora
    May 24, 2012

    Hard for me to write commentary with many thoughts and emotions on these BOOKS…because its just that a series of books that strikes at the very core of relationships….Intimacy comes in many forms and if you think this book is true pornography..then uhmmmm u all have not read or watched (nor should u watch) porn….these books r as the title says 50 shades of grey…50 shades to look and experience things differently.
    It’s about putting on your ‘big girl’ panties….allowing yourself to give up control and b lost in the moment. The books only get better and better. DON’T judge a book by its cover…its deeper than just sex between two consenting adults….
    Get the book finished dear sister…..then u can read my second one….

    Reply
    • May 24, 2012

      LOL – I will finish the first one – Must. Get. Through. It!!

      Reply
  18. Shelly
    May 24, 2012

    I totally agree with Leslie & Teresa Marie. This book, it is just words and I think that books are suppose to take you away from your everyday life! The second book, I think , starts off very very sad and you can kinda start to see why Christian is the way he is.

    Reply
  19. Carrie
    May 24, 2012

    I read all three books in 4 days (thank you iBooks). While I shamelessly loved the erotica, I loved the story more. The emails back and forth had to be my absolute favorite. I commented to a friend that it was like Twilight, but all grown up & no vampires! The psychological side of Christian’s problems fascinated me, and ahh then there is Ana’s need to fix him…so fun to follow. I enjoyed…won’t let my 15 yo daughter read, she can stick to Twilight… Would love to have hard copy for my library! :)

    Reply
    • Jennie
      May 24, 2012

      I actually loved the e-mail parts, too. It reminded me of my relationship with my husband in the beginning. :) We flirted over e-mail alot. I usually read action more than romance. I agree that there is an emotional push and pull in this book. (And I shamelessly admit that I loved the vampires in Twilight. Silly? Maybe.)

      Reply
  20. Trisha
    May 24, 2012

    I want to read these whole series because i have heard such wonderful things about it. How it could change my life and my relationship with my husband.

    Reply
  21. May 24, 2012

    Based on the reviews up above, I think I would most certainly read this book. I fell in love with the Twilight saga (I even have a Twilight tattoo) and if this story is anything similar, pornographic or not I’m sure I’ll enjoy at least tidbits of it. Secondly, reading is one of my favorite things to do when I can find the time. My current bath time book is “Espresso for your soul” and I think this book would make a nice bath time/bedtime read.

    Reply
  22. Joni Kuzma
    May 24, 2012

    I was a “Twilight” series hold out, too. I couldn’t understand how books about vampires and shape changers could be enjoyable, much less riveting! Couldn’t put them down…three in a row. “50 Shades…” intrigues me in much the same way. It makes me wonder what (or whether) readers crave what the book offers or if it is a diversion from real life which can be challenging and muddy.

    I appreciate the divergent views expressed about the book and series. I’m determined to keep an open mind! I watched “Ellen” when she read an excerpt from the book and it made me laugh out loud. Plus, it made me curious!

    I haven’t read “Hunger Games” yet, either! Any reviews forthcoming or am I WAY behind on those, too? :-)

    Reply
    • May 24, 2012

      Joni – I haven’t read hunger games yet either (SO BEHIND!) and I didn’t get on the Twilight bandwagon until really late as well. Didn’t read the books – but watched the movies. ;) They are another fun way to just ‘not think.’ Sometimes – that’s needed.

      Reply
  23. Gail S.
    May 24, 2012

    I agree completely with Teresa Marie!! I am on book 2 and enjoy reading about Ana and Christian. I work full time and when I come home I have a house to clean, laundry to do, dinner to fix etc…..it is not all that interesting so in the evening if I can sit down and “get away from it all” & read about someones fantasy life – great :) I too loved the emails back and forth between Ana and Christian! Hey even Dr. Oz has recommended reading them so enjoy :)

    Reply
  24. Lisa Kennicutt
    May 24, 2012

    I have been hearing a lot about this book. I even saw the interview with the author on Good Morning America. At first I didn’t think that it would be a book that would interest me. It sounded more like a “cheesy” romance novel ( no offense to those who might like those kinds of books). But it would seem that the more I hear about this book, the more I think I should read it and make my own decision about it. Besides, as a mother of three boys, it isn’t often I get to read anything romantic. And while I didn’t get into the whole “Twilight” phase, I was more of a ‘Harry Potter’ buff, I did enjoy the ‘Hunger Games’. But with those whole series under my belt, I really would like to find some thing new to read.

    Reply
  25. Terry
    May 24, 2012

    I loved 50 Shades of Grey it took me away. I agree with Teresa Marie it wasn’t the best book I have ever read but it took me away, transported me away from badly written TV shows. I liked the story line to think how love changed Christian’s life. From a lonely person needing some control in his life to a very giving loving person. Yes the content was very blunt at times but that was the shock to keep you reading.

    Reply
  26. Sarah
    May 24, 2012

    I loved the book…not really into bondage and stuff but I found myself blushing and not wanting to put it down! I am on the 2nd book and am almost done with it and can’twait to read the 3rd. I think that later down the road I will have to re-read it! Some of the stuff made me blush when the kids were around!

    Reply
  27. Cindy
    May 24, 2012

    The last time I checked on where I was on the libraries list, I was 33!

    Reply
  28. Jessica
    May 24, 2012

    One of my friends rolls me about this book and I want to read out so bad!!

    Reply
  29. Toni
    May 24, 2012

    I plan to read it. I believe that a book is just a book – same with movies and tv. Yes, there may be a better use for my time, but that doesn’t change the fact that I am a responsible adult and not an easily influenced person. I don’t believe that sex, or violence, or anything else in books and on tv will corrupt me or change my thinking.

    Reply
  30. Amber
    May 24, 2012

    Hmmm. Not going there! Our society paints such a skewed picture of intimacy. For years I thought I was truly “messed up” from past experiences and after many years of treading through the mire and muck, I cannot find a reason good enough to stick my head in a book that could send me reeling after so many strides that I’ve taken to heal. This book sounds damaging to relationships, self esteem and I hate the thought of bad writing being published before quality uplifting words that can inspire life. No reading this for me.

    Reply
    • May 25, 2012

      Right there with you Amber. I’ve been there as a kid so I know the damage things like this can cause in the wrong hands.

      Reply
  31. Tara
    May 24, 2012

    My coworker has read all three books and said how hard they were to put down. I am excited to start reading the 50 shades books, they are on my “MUST” read list!

    Reply
  32. Amber
    May 24, 2012

    I am choosing to not read the book based on a lot of things Heather included in her reasons. I would however LOVE to read the other book mentioned…even if there’s no waiting list for it at the library :)

    Reply
    • May 25, 2012

      Amber you will love it, I couldn’t put it down. Under A German Moon, combines history, a woman’s heart, and adventure. So SO good. :-)

      Reply
  33. Michele
    May 25, 2012

    Heather did an excellent job representing my reasons for passing on “50 Shades”. I find it quite disturbing that many women are choosing to read this book because they don’t want to be left out of the discussion. I also find the excuse that it is “only words” difficult to swallow in a culture that increasingly asks us to consider more carefully the impact that words have on others. If they are “only words” are they “words” that you would feel comfortable reading outloud to children? I think it is sad that women are sending the message to publishers that this is the type of literature that we want, because I can assure you it will be the type they produce now that they have seen the $$$ they can make. As the mother of two adult daughters and a daughter in law, I wish a different message had been sent.

    Reply
    • May 25, 2012

      I think that as well. Only because I know that words can tear a person apart or build them up. Thanks Michelle for sharing.

      Reply
  34. Ann Snider
    May 25, 2012

    I will not be reading “50 Shades.” While I appreciate good literature and love to read, I consider this genre nothing more than “pornography.” I believe just like with soap operas, romance novels and other types of this same entertainment that they paint for us a picture of what we thing “normal” should be. When I am in in a relationship with someone, you and I both know that we aren’t always dressed in our best clothes, our make up and hair isn’t perfect and by all means I am not always having the perfect day .

    I appreciated Heather’s stance on the book. We need to teach our children that life is real….what is normal and that everyday is filled with many challenges that we might not expect. If our children get the sense that life is making love all day and being completely in love with no other cares in the world, I think we have done them a huge dis-service.

    I work hard everyday in my relationship with my husband. I have to carve out time for that relationship and it takes work . I am saddened when others cheapen that relationship. I try to have what I call the “Holy Spirit with me me each day. I believe that God’s presence can be with me and that that spirit is offended when I bring that kind of thing into my mind. I believe my body is a “temple”. We need to nourish it both physically and mentally with things that will help it remain so. Eating properly, getting rest, reading good literature, watching good entertainment, talking well about others, treating others kindly, exercising, working on relationships, for me that is what life is all about!

    So sorry, I won’t be buying into the “50 Shades of Grey” hype! Give me a chance to win the other novel you suggested.

    Reply
    • May 25, 2012

      Thank you Ann, great analogies. Alot of women don’t have great relationships with thier spouses which is why so many turn to books like this. Nope not for me.

      Reply
  35. Connie
    May 25, 2012

    I find it interesting that the 30-something generation finds this kind of literature OK. And encourages their friends to read trash. (remember,Playboy has great articles) My parents taught me that trash in is trash out. They are right. Everything you read changes you in some way. Why spend time making yourself less than who you want to be?

    Reply
    • May 25, 2012

      So true Connie, trash in, trash out.

      Reply
      • May 25, 2012

        People have different versions of “trash.” People have different versions of words. To some – words are painful – for others, it’s just words. The book didn’t change me. ;)

    • Jennie
      May 25, 2012

      Interesting point. It might be that our generation has been bombarded by naked pictures, rated R movies, and SEX all the time. Perhaps that’s why this just doesn’t seem like a big deal. I also feel that I’m strong enough in my own self, marriage and faith to be able to read something and leave that in a ‘fiction’ box and return to my own life. I love my husband and family. I’m confident in that love. I work hard every day just like anyone who knows marriage is hard work. I just don’t think reading a book affects that.

      Reply
  36. Lindsay Abegglen
    May 25, 2012

    After reading your opinions on the book, I want to read it! It peaked my interest when I heard it being compared to the twilight sereies which I love! My husband first told me about this book which I had been hearing about but didnt know a thing about it. I think it will be interesting to read, something totally different from what im used to but that can also be good. Im excited to start it this summer, it will be at the top of my list!

    Reply
  37. Laura
    May 25, 2012

    I will also be choosing not to read these books. The first thing that comes to mind are the verses in Philippians that Heather quoted. Thinking on things that are good for me and pure is the best way to go. I know the days I put scripture in my head and read books that reflect my Christian values my heart and mind are able to stay focused on God and not go in directions they shouldn’t. Our culture has become a “do what feels go to you” culture which is leading us down some very bad roads.

    Reply
  38. May 25, 2012

    I don’t see any benefits of reading a book like this. It is perverse and pornographic in nature. God gave Man and Wife sexual intimacy as a wonderful gift. Unfortunately in our broken and sinful world, it has been twisted and violated. I completely agree with Heather’s post, and am happy to see others stand strong in what they know to be true.

    Reply
  39. Nina
    May 25, 2012

    I’m not sure I see the point in reading a book like this so you can discuss it especially if you wan’t be getting around to it for a long time. It seems like by the time you get to it the world will have moved on to the next big thing. I wouldn’t say I’m a prude when it comes to reading material but, from what I’ve heard this isn’t a very well-written series. In fact it sounds like it’s main lure is the graphic nature. There are so many books out there, I guess I just feel like reading this one would be a waste of my time. I love fiction but I want it to be the sort that makes it a little difficult to pick something up for a while because it was such a good book.

    Reply
    • Alison
      May 25, 2012

      I disagree Nina. Yes, when we are not a part of the current discussion it does seem like we’re missing out but I don’t think this is a reason to not read a book. In many instances, books take on a second life after their initial release. Granted this book will probably not be a classic, but a book doesn’t become a classic right off the shelf. Plus, popular books get a second life in movies, television shows and plays which usually come out years after the initial publication.

      Think of it like technology, we have the early adopters who take the plunge and then show the rest of us how cool something is but then it might take the rest of us years to catch on while they have already moved on to the next new thing. We all can’t be the early adopters!

      Reply
  40. May 25, 2012

    I’m so glad we have so many different opinions on this site. Thank you ALL for sharing yours – and for staying ‘kind’ with your views!

    Reply
    • May 25, 2012

      Being able to discuss where we come from is SO SO important. :-)

      Reply
      • Jennie
        May 25, 2012

        Agree!!

  41. Cindy
    May 25, 2012

    I’m with you Heather! Not going to read this book. Ever since I was born again, I have been very careful not to expose my mind or eyes to this type of material and, more importantly, I have no desire or need to do so. Far to often movies, music and books will lead us into temptation. We have to be so careful of that “slow fade”, every step we move away from what is good and healthy for us, the more desensitized we become, and more accepting of what is going to be harmful to us and our relationships in the long run. My rule of thumb is, if it’s not appropriate for my kids to watch or listen to, why would it be ok for me either?

    Reply
    • May 25, 2012

      With the rates of crime, divorce, teen pregnancy, high school drop outs, and the break down of families, one only needs to point to the media. I’ve just completed several studies for another book I am working on.

      Reply
  42. Jennie
    May 27, 2012

    The more I’m reading this series and the reasons why people are not reading it, the more I’m thinking about it. The really interesting part to me is that Anastasia is loving Christian through all of his faults. She is teaching him to love her back. The whole series is about overcoming evil in its rarest form. It is about helping people to see love, to feel love and to change. And (although I didn’t read this book or series for any Christian purposes) the series actually highlights what Christians are supposed to do… love the sinner not the sin… help people overcome their sinful lives. Yes, the BDSM is sinful. Yes, the lust the media discusses is sinful. The words make me uncomfortable. But in the end, the series has an interesting message.

    Reply
  43. Shari
    June 08, 2012

    I don’t think we should make things complicated when they don’t have to be, take it for what it is- an erotic story that will take you out of your life for just a little while, think of it as a mini vacation from your life(that’s what it felt like to me). I was hesitant about reading these books but I am glad I did.

    Reply
    • Jennie
      June 09, 2012

      I totally agree, Shari. It seems like the reason most people (including myself) are reading it isn’t so much the sexual draw, but to figure out why everyone is so angry about it.

      Reply
      • June 09, 2012

        I would have to agree with you both in a way. I was angry about it, the more I thought about it, I realized it was because I felt threatened that no one else saw or understood my perspective. I still won’t read it though. :-)

  44. Mike
    June 12, 2012

    I have read it (after my wife did) and I’m conflicted about it. I’m more lined up with Heather.

    If the aim of this is erotica, then frankly, I don’t want my wife sleeping with me because she was turned on by someone else…real or fiction. In the same way, I understand and try to be consistent in my viewing habits. Hooters is not a restaurant I’d eat at, for instance. Maybe I’m narrow-minded!

    But I am amazed at the following of the book. Mommy Porn. I always thought that us guys were perverts growing up…thinking about sex all the time. That women had it under control. But, that doesn’t appear to be a fair statement. I wonder what really is going on in a woman’s mind if reading this book helps her sex life at home.

    That being said, I do enjoy the story of redemption in the story… that no one is unlovable….that there is hope for ‘normal’ relationships.

    Reply
    • Jennie
      June 18, 2012

      I agree, Mike. I’m reading the second book — slowly — as life is getting in the way. I like the story that no one is unlovable. To me, it is just a story. It didn’t change anything in my bedroom. I read it just like I read the Twilight series or any other book I”ve read. I’m facinated by the nature vs nurture argument the book brings up. I just find it interesting. I think people are getting really worked up over what they ‘think’ might be written. Honestly, the ‘eriotica’ isn’t very erotic.

      Reply
  45. Heather
    June 18, 2012

    A Man’s Perspective Dave Boehi
    Recently my wife, Merry, asked, “I’ve been hearing about this new book, Fifty Shades of Grey. I wonder if that would be good to read?”
    To answer her question, I began by looking up the book on Amazon and reading the description:
    When literature student Anastasia Steele goes to interview young entrepreneur Christian Grey, she encounters a man who is beautiful, brilliant, and intimidating. The unworldly, innocent Ana is startled to realize she wants this man and, despite his enigmatic reserve, finds she is desperate to get close to him. Unable to resist Ana’s quiet beauty, wit, and independent spirit, Grey admits he wants her, too—but on his own terms.
    Shocked yet thrilled by Grey’s singular erotic tastes, Ana hesitates. For all the trappings of success—his multinational businesses, his vast wealth, his loving family—Grey is a man tormented by demons and consumed by the need to control. When the couple embarks on a daring, passionately physical affair, Ana discovers Christian Grey’s secrets and explores her own dark desires.

    “Actually, this description doesn’t reveal much about what the book is really about.” I said to Merry. “From what I’ve read, this is a book about sexual bondage and sadism. So … does that sound like something you want to read?”

    “I don’t think so.”

    It was an easy decision for Merry, but apparently there are many Christian women today who are hearing about this book and are wondering, “Should I read Fifty Shades of Grey?” Many women love stories about romance, and here’s a book that has become a national sensation—the book and its two sequels rank 1-3 at the top of the New York Times paperback bestseller list. So many women are talking about the book that others want to become part of the conversation.

    For some women, the decision of whether to read it is simple once they learn what the book is about. Others are curious and want to try it out, so to speak. And others can’t understand what the fuss is about. “Isn’t this just a book?” they ask. “It isn’t real, after all, it’s just fiction. It might even spice up your sex life with your husband!”

    Falling into the same trap

    Words like these sound awfully familiar to me because they’re the same justifications that men use for consuming pornography. And that’s why I’m writing, as a man, about a book written primarily for women. I hate to see women falling into the same trap that has claimed so many men.

    I’m writing these words a few hours after watching a preview session from FamilyLife’s upcoming Stepping Up video series for men. In this session, men were challenged to “stand firm”—to step up and do the right thing no matter what temptations you face or what circumstances you find yourself in. As 1 Corinthians 16:13-14 tells us, “Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. Let all that you do be done in love.”

    One of the ongoing battles for any man is with lust, and each day he is tempted to look at images that feed this lust. At one point the video session focused on one man’s struggle with pornography and how it nearly destroyed his marriage. And it struck me that there’s little difference between the effects of a man choosing to view pornography and the effects of a woman reading books like Fifty Shades of Grey.

    The right place for sexual desire

    Some people will say it’s unfair to criticize a book I haven’t read. Often I agree with that sentiment, but not when it comes to erotica or pornography. Here are a few points to consider:

    1. Erotic photos, videos, and books are all designed with one thing in mind—to stimulate sexual desire. From a biblical standpoint, sexual desire is good as long as it’s in the right context. But I think it’s safe to say that the creators of erotica and pornography are not very concerned about whether they help couples build stronger marriages. Instead, using these media invites men and women to fantasize about sexual relationships outside of marriage. That’s a dangerous path to walk. It leads to unhealthy comparisons with your spouse and a host of other problems. If the sexual relationship in a marriage is weak, reading erotica or viewing porn is not a good way to add some sparks.

    2. Erotica and pornography promote a corrupted view of something God designed as beautiful. Dr. Al Mohler, president of Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, says it well:

    Rightly understood and rightly ordered, marriage is a picture of God’s own covenantal faithfulness. Marriage is to display God’s glory, reveal God’s good gifts to His creatures, and protect human beings from the inevitable disaster that follows when sexual passions are divorced from their rightful place.

    The physicality of the male and female bodies cries out for fulfillment in the other. The sex drive calls both men and women out of themselves and toward a covenantal relationship that is consummated in a one-flesh union. By definition, sex within marriage is not merely the accomplishment of sexual fulfillment on the part of two individuals who happen to share the same bed. Rather, it is mutual self-giving that reaches pleasures both physical and spiritual.

    A man who directs his sexual drive toward the one-flesh relationship in marriage, Mohler writes, “is the perfect paradigm of God’s intention in creation.” By contrast, a man involved with pornography subverts his sex drive toward lust and self-gratification. “Rather than taking satisfaction in a wife, he looks at dirty pictures in order to be rewarded with sexual arousal that comes without responsibility, expectation, or demand.”

    3. The particular genre highlighted in Fifty Shades of Grey, BDSM, is even worse. BDSM stands for bondage, dominance, sadism, and masochism. These practices are the opposite of the “mutual self-giving” that should characterize a holy, biblical sexual relationship in marriage.

    4. The fact that a book is fiction doesn’t negate the damaging consequences of reading it. Words can penetrate your mind in negative ways just as images can. In Philippians 4:8 the Bible tells us, “whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” Can you truly do that while simultaneously reading this book?

    5. You don’t need to join every conversation. We like to think that teenagers are particularly vulnerable to peer pressure, but sometimes I wonder if it’s just as bad for adults. Think of what a mother tells her kids: “If all your friends jumped off a cliff, would you do the same thing?” The same goes for friends urging you to read erotica or look at pornography.

    Is it good for your marriage?

    “I’ve been studying what God says about sexuality for 15 years,” writes Dannah Gresh in a blog post titled, “Why I’m Not Reading Fifty Shades of Grey.”

    According to Him, there is only one who should stimulate sexual desire in me: my husband. Since that’s God’s plan for my sexual desire, anything other than my husband creating arousal in me would be missing the mark of God’s intention. (Translation: it is sin.) Jesus said it this way: “You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” The same is true of a woman looking at or reading about a man.

    Erotica, especially the genre involving bondage and sadism, easily leads to a corrupted view of something God created as good within the context of marriage. It sparks physiological reactions that require greater and greater levels for fulfillment; it causes unhealthy comparison to a real-life spouse; and it leads men and women to be preoccupied with sexual fulfillment at the expense of other relationships, including their relationship with God.

    So you’ve got to ask yourself: Is any of that good for your marriage?

    My hope and prayer is that Christian women, when faced with the temptation of a book like Fifty Shades of Grey, will “be watchful” and “stand firm in the faith.” Don’t fall into the same trap as men do with pornography.

    Reply
    • Jennie
      June 18, 2012

      I honestly don’t agree with several things stated here.

      1. This book has a story. It talks about nature vs nurture. It isn’t purely created to stir up pleasure in women. It IS “just a book”. I CAN read it and move on. I honestly was as turned on by this book as by Twilight or any other romance novel I’ve ever read. It is NO BIG DEAL.

      2. I have nothing to add about what God wants me to do in my bedroom.

      3. Ana refuses the BDSM part of the relationship. It is about overcoming evil, not giving in to it.

      4. I would have to give up most of the TV, movies, books, etc that I actually enjoy to be thinking ‘pure and honorable’ thoughts all of the time.

      5. I’m a curious person. I love to find out why people are talking. I actually have always thought about that cliff saying with a smile. I have always thought, “I might jump off a cliff if everyone else was.” And I might. I’ve jumped out of a plane. I’ve bungie jumped. I consider the consequences and, if I think I can handle them, I do it. I did that with this book. I COULD handle it. Perhaps it is because I’ve lived in a world constantly barraging me with sexual scenes since the day I was born (just an average American household.) Honestly, this book is interesting. It is causing an interesting stir. But it is JUST A BOOK. At the end of the day I am stronger. My faith is stronger. My love for my husband is stronger than a silly book. Nothing has changed in my life since I read it.

      I’m totally fine with people choosing not to read the book. Good for you. I chose not to read The Hunger Games and Harry Potter series. We all read what we want to read.

      I’m NOT okay with people condemning me or implying that either I’m too weak, my faith is too weak or my marriage is too weak to handle me reading a silly book.

      Reply
  46. Megan
    July 06, 2012

    Proverbs 4:23 “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” If I could pick out one thing that God has been teaching me in the last few weeks, it is that He loves me far more than I could imagine and has far more planned for my life than I could dream. It’s with this in mind that I think about my thoughts on the last craze of 50 Shades, Magic Mike, sex parties, etc. God calls me not to judge (Romans 8:1) but it’s not because everything is permissible, it’s because He is the king and the only one in charge of judgment (2 Timothy 4:8). He doesn’t call me away from sin because He’s ruining my fun, He calls me away from it because He is the giver of “every good and perfect gift.” This includes my heart, because it is the “wellspring of life”. The gifts that God gives me include my shelter, food and clothing, but they also include blessings beyond the temporary. The best gifts that God gives me come through my heart. Contentment, love, faith, hope, a strong relationship with my family and friends, and intimacy and passion with my husband. If I am going to truly enjoy all that God has in store for me, I MUST guard my heart. I MUST protect what enters my mind, not because I am earning God’s love but because I don’t want anything else (sin) stealing away the joy that God has for me.
    Philippians 4:8 shows me how to guard my heart, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.”

    Reply
    • July 06, 2012

      Well written and well said Megan. Thank you. :-)

      Reply
  47. Annie
    July 11, 2012

    I like this article by Jill Savage
    There’s a push these days for healthy eating. We have more nutritional information than any previous generation and many of us are conscious of our carbs, sodium, and calorie consumption more than ever before. Countless concerned moms are limiting processed foods and trying to provide fresh, organic foods for their families.

    There’s also a push for green home products. More and more we’re hearing about just how many chemicals can be found in everyday cleaning supplies. Scores of conscientious moms are making their own cleaning supplies using natural products like vinegar and baking soda.

    After all, we want what’s best for our family and some of us will go the distance to protect them from the dangers of this world. Right?

    We’re concerned about what we’re putting in our mouths. We’re concerned about what we’re absorbing through our skin. Why then are we not concerned about what we’re feeding our minds?

    What I’m talking about are the droves of mothers who are grabbing girlfriends and heading out to see the movie “Magic Mike.” I’m also referring to the thousands of moms who are snatching the book Fifty Shades of Grey off bookstore shelves or downloading it onto their Kindle or Nook readers.

    Let me tell you right up front, I haven’t seen the movie “Magic Mike,” nor have I read Fifty Shades of Grey. I won’t be opening my heart up to either one. Why? Because I firmly believe they are junk food for the mind.

    In the same way that potato chips do nothing to nourish my body, movies about male strippers and erotica novels about extramarital affairs do nothing to nourish my mind.

    There’s a reason God tells us in Philippians 4:8, “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”

    He clearly wants us to consume only what is good for our mind.

    I won’t be reading an erotica novel or seeing a sexually tantalizing movie for these reasons:

    They can cause me to compare my real life to something that is not real. This can cause me to be dissatisfied with my real life and ultimately become discontent.
    They can erode my sense of right and wrong.Sex outside of marriage is wrong, no matter how you paint the picture. I don’t need to feed my mind any message that desensitizes me to what is right and what is wrong.
    They can cause me to think about another man. The Bible calls this lust and God says it’s not healthy for our hearts and minds.
    Don’t get me wrong. I like sex. A lot. I wouldn’t have written a book on the subject if I didn’t!

    However, I’m intensely aware of how easily the human heart can be led in the wrong direction. A movie here. A novel there. Before you know it, your heart has been drawn away from the things most important in this world.

    For me there’s fifty shades of “no” and there’s no magic in Mike…only Mark.

    Will you join me in fifty shades of “no?”

    Reply
  48. Cara Putman
    September 11, 2012

    I’m late to the party…just found you on Facebook today. As a Nebraska girl and an author, I agree wholeheartedly with Heather. I want to fill my mind with things that are pleasing to my Father. I also want to read books that encourage me, challenge me and fill me with real emotion. There are so many authors that do that. (Tricia Goyer is a great example). And I want to feel the real ups and downs of love and attraction with my husband not with some figment of another writer’s imagination.

    Reply

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