Inspiration Journal Relationships

Husband Material: 11 Ways to Know He’s “The One”

Husband Material: 11 Ways to Know He's "The One"
Written by Blair Cissell

I’ve always believed in fairy tales, but in real life it isn’t always as easy to find your Prince Charming. You may have to go through a lot of bad guys & maybe even kiss a few toads. But then, you see him (probably minus the white stallion or puffy sleeves) & once you find him, it’s easy to know what makes him so special… 

 

11. He’s There to Pick You Up

Literally, he physically picks you up after you have fallen: down the stairs, over your heels, on ice. Wherever the “hypothetical” location, he’s the one who rushes to your side to make sure you are okay. If you’re sick, he goes to the store to spend his latest paycheck on ice cream, Gatorade, every cold/flu medicine possible, a thermometer, and chocolate. Anything to help you get back on your feet.

10. He Goes Above & Beyond

He will do anything for you. Whether that is reaching things on shelves you cannot reach, killing spiders for you, making you breakfast when he knows you are running late (again), or patiently teaching you how to lift weights, so you don’t look quite as pathetic in the gym. He also goes above the ordinary to be a real life Prince Charming. When you can no longer attend the concert you bought tickets for a year in advance, due to torrential rain in the area — he downloads every Fall Out Boy song ever made (even though he likes about 2 of the songs), drives an hour to your house, gets you to come outside in your pajamas, and blasts your own personal concert through his car speakers so you can dance. Or he writes one reason he loves you every day for two months, when the Army takes him away for training….above & beyond anything you can imagine. 

 
9. He Keeps You Humble

You are able to tease each other about your mistakes in life. Remember the time you had a meltdown in Walgreens because your lipstick broke open over your brand new coat? And THE WHOLE WORLD was out to get you because LIFE IS NOT FAIR… (again, “hypothetical”). While he was there to listen, he can also bring up the scenario later to help you laugh off tough situations. On a scale of 1-Walgreens meltdown, how upset are you? You can also do the same for him: Like giggling about the time he realized ‘Netflix’ is a combination of two words… 

 
8. He’s The New Family Favorite

He not only realizes the importance of your family, but wants to make your parents his parents too. He will asks for their permission to marry you and asks your best friends too, because they are a subset of your family — he knows how they all make you who you are. After that, he will become the new favorite. Signs include: Your mother making treats especially for him, dad approving of him taking care of his little girl, and your friends/ siblings actually wanting to hang out with him for fun. Once he’s in the family group text, you know he’s here to stay.

 
7. You Are Friends First

Building your relationship on friendship is really important. Now, I’m not saying you should be like me and keep them in the friend-zone for too long, but friends get to know each other. They like spending time together. They laugh and cry. They are your support through life. We were friends for 5 years — writing letters through a deployment and several international trips, participating in musicals together, going to classes & studying together, and making surprises for each birthday. He attended my college graduation, cheered me up when I lost loved ones, helped move my furniture, talked me through a stolen car (not hypothetical) and so many other things. Those are the guys who are always there & this one will be forever.

 
6. You Communicate Without Speaking

You can tell he loves you by the look in his eyes. They way he hugs you. The smile he makes when you do something silly. You could sit in a room and never say a word, because you don’t need to. Not that conversation isn’t important, it is imperative to a great relationship (Trust me: I’m a communication major). You are just able to read each other like a book — and thankfully this one doesn’t have an end. 

 
5. He Brags About You 

If I could count the number of times some of his friends/family/co-workers/random strangers said, “Oh, so she’s the one you always talk about” I could retire comfortably.  He thinks about you often, so in turn those around him hear about you just as much. For me, this sunk in when ALL of the people at a local business knew about me through his job– when he stopped there he would gush about me to whoever would listen. The entire establishment sent us an engagement card. He tells you and the world how beautiful you are and isn’t afraid to be a little vocal. 

 
4. He Inspires You to Be Your Best

You see the amazing characteristics and abilities he has to offer the world and you think to yourself, “How did I get to be so lucky?” You know that a guy like him deserves a girl at the same caliber, and you want to be better. Not that he thinks you need to be by any means. You just internally want to portray your best self — because he inspires you to be just that. 

 
3. You Forget the Past

The moment he held my hand for the first time, I knew this was something completely different than I have ever felt before. The kind of butterflies you experience with him make you forget about any previous relationship — there is just no comparison. You learn lessons from those relationships and carry them with you, but not once do you think about another guy. Your brain & heart are just too full thinking about your future husband. 

 
2. You Find Yourself

Some people think that relationships are a 50/50 compromise; each putting in half to make up a whole, but in reality it’s a 100/100 arrangement. Neither of you are putting in more than the other, because you both are 100% in love, 100% invested in the relationship, and 100% yourself. A great example is in Runaway Bride, when Julia Roberts has no idea what kind of eggs she likes; she always likes whatever her significant other eats at the time. I did the same thing with the kind of music I listened to — changing to what he liked best. You cannot be with another, before you can be alone by yourself & be okay with who you are. When he is the one, you don’t feel the need to conform to what you think he would want you to like, you can just be yourself. Plus, he helps you discover who you are. 

 
1. He Makes You Feel Christ’s Love

When you pray about the man you want to marry your whole life and then God places him in your life, your faith will definitely grow. If you are like me, you prayed for the “perfect” man — wanting an abundance of amazing qualities (hard working, handsome, thoughtful, musical, humble, godly etc.). You don’t want to settle for anything less, but deep down, after failed relationships & boys that let you down, you start to think you may never find “the one”. But then, one day there he is, your dream boy & God has placed him in your life just for you. So your faith grows. How could the God of the universe take time to create and give me exactly what I have imagined? And you are humbled, every day. Then, knowing how much you love each other as a couple & how much this man loves you — it is almost impossible to fathom how much Christ loves you infinitely more. I think that true love shows you just how wide, how long & how deep the love of God is for you — which is exactly the way He designed it to be.

Written for my future husband, Jerromy. 

About the author

Blair Cissell

Blair Cissell is a recent college graduate who is learning to take on the newfound title of being an “adult”. She has landed her first grown-up job as the Event Director for the Kearney Area Chamber of Commerce, but Blair will always be a kid-at-heart who loves all things Disney. In her own fairytale of a life, she recently married the man of her dreams and has added another title to her resume — wife. When she isn’t at work, you can find her volunteering, spending time with friends and family, meeting with church groups, working out, or playing her favorite sport – shopping. Writing has always been a passion, that she uses to express her (limited) experience on love, relationships and growing-up while exploring the beauty & power of words. She encourages you to SimplyB.. yourself. http://bcissell.blogspot.com/