Our Keepsake Journal is Here! 🎉

 “How about we ditch this whole hometown wedding thing and get married in Greece?”

These were my now-husband’s very words to me about two months before our wedding. Although our engagement only lasted six months, he was already done with the planning and the waiting. Dangling a trip to Greece before me was a bit like offering a toddler a cookie – no way could I pass that up – and he knew it.

Except one thing; my husband wasn’t just marrying me. When we exchanged I do’s, two communities came together. From that day forward, our families joined as one. No matter how enticing Greece sounded, I couldn’t do it. Now, if he’d only offer me that trip again after 14 years of marriage…

So we went ahead with our plans and got married on the gravel road in rural Missouri where I’d spent my entire childhood. We wanted to have the ceremony at my dad’s pond – a picturesque setting surrounded by varying shades of green prairie grass, rolling hills and spring flowers in full bloom. Following that, we’d hold the reception under a big, white tent in the backyard. April showers convinced us a plan B was in order. The morning of our wedding, we made the decision to move our outdoor ceremony to the country church up the road from my family’s home place. The church never locked its doors, and our neighbors (the church caretakers), told us we could certainly use the church that morning. Fortunately, it stopped raining long enough in the afternoon for us to still hold our reception under the tent.

Some brides would have lost it over this last minute decision. I read about these weddings that cost upwards of $20,000 and the first thing I do is wonder what on earth people do for a living that they can afford to spend that much money on one event. Then, I realize that’s not the kind of wedding I wanted at all. I made my decision the day my husband asked me if I’d be willing to get married in Greece. I only wanted one type of wedding, a simple day surrounded by loved ones, and that’s exactly what we had.

Altogether, our wedding cost under a thousand dollars. For decoration, we placed Mason jars with silk lavender stalks (the ones that were to sit beside each row of white, wooden chairs outside) to the front steps of the church. My former Sunday School teacher offered to help us set up, and he was responsible for moving the collection of items that had accumulated in the choir loft to the church basement. Two of my cousins, my best friend, and my husband’s best friend provided the music. My aunts made my wedding dress. A local violinist played as I walked down the aisle. My husband’s cousin took our wedding pictures. My youth pastor officiated the ceremony. The redbud tree in my parents’ yard offered a scenic shot for pictures. Everyone’s shoes got ruined traipsing around in the mud all day. My mother-in-law and sister-in-law made the wedding cake. My friend’s dad, who owned a local restaurant in town, carved the whole hog. Our local Hy-Vee grocery store prepared the side dishes, and my mom’s co-workers served the food. Admittedly, I did get a little fancy, ordering chocolate-covered strawberries.

It was a far cry from Greece, but we were surrounded by some pretty important people. The ones who had invested in us our whole lives, invested in our wedding day as well. A friend of ours in attendance that day always tells me, of all the weddings where she’s been a guest, ours was her favorite because I wouldn’t let anything put a damper on our day (and there was plenty of dampness I assure you). It wasn’t about the money, and it wasn’t really about the location either. It was, as any special ceremony should be, about the people we love.

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Check out our new Keepsake Companion Journal that pairs with our So God Made a Mother book!

Order Now
So God Made a Mother's Story Keepsake Journal

Traci Rhoades

Traci Rhoades is a writer and Bible teacher. She lives in the Grand Rapids, Michigan area with her family and an ever-changing number of pets. Connect with her online at tracesoffaith.com or @tracesoffaith on twitter. She is the author of "Not All Who Wander (Spiritually) Are Lost."

I Thought Our Friendship Would Be Unbreakable

In: Friendship, Journal, Relationships
Two friends selfie

The message notification pinged on my phone. A woman, once one of my best friends, was reaching out to me via Facebook. Her message simply read, “Wanted to catch up and see how life was treating you!”  I had very conflicting feelings. It seemed with that one single message, a flood of memories surfaced. Some held some great moments and laughter. Other memories held disappointment and hurt of a friendship that simply had run its course. Out of morbid curiosity, I clicked on her profile page to see how the years had been treating her. She was divorced and still...

Keep Reading

The First 10 Years: How Two Broken People Kept Their Marriage from Breaking

In: Journal, Marriage, Relationships
The First Ten Years: How Two Broken People Kept Their Marriage from Breaking www.herviewfromhome.com

We met online in October of 2005, by way of a spam email ad I was THIS CLOSE to marking as trash. Meet Single Christians! My cheese alert siren sounded loudly, but for some reason, I unchecked the delete box and clicked through to the site. We met face-to-face that Thanksgiving. As I awaited your arrival in my mother’s kitchen, my dad whispered to my little brother, “Hide your valuables. Stacy has some guy she met online coming for Thanksgiving dinner.” We embraced for the first time in my parents’ driveway. I was wearing my black cashmere sweater with the...

Keep Reading

To The Mother Who Is Overwhelmed

In: Inspiration, Motherhood
Tired woman with coffee sitting at table

I have this one head. It is a normal sized head. It didn’t get bigger because I had children. Just like I didn’t grow an extra arm with the birth of each child. I mean, while that would be nice, it’s just not the case. We keep our one self. And the children we add on each add on to our weight in this life. And the head didn’t grow more heads because we become a wife to someone. Or a boss to someone. We carry the weight of motherhood. The decisions we must make each day—fight the shorts battle...

Keep Reading

You’re a Little Less Baby Today Than Yesterday

In: Journal, Motherhood
Toddler sleeping in mother's arms

Tiny sparkles are nestled in the wispy hair falling across her brow, shaken free of the princess costume she pulled over her head this morning. She’s swathed in pink: a satiny pink dress-up bodice, a fluffy, pink, slightly-less-glittery-than-it-was-two-hours-ago tulle skirt, a worn, soft pink baby blanket. She’s slowed long enough to crawl into my lap, blinking heavy eyelids. She’s a little less baby today than she was only yesterday.  Soon, she’ll be too big, too busy for my arms.  But today, I’m rocking a princess. The early years will be filled with exploration and adventure. She’ll climb atop counters and...

Keep Reading

Dear Husband, I Loved You First

In: Marriage, Motherhood, Relationships
Man and woman kissing in love

Dear husband, I loved you first. But often, you get the last of me. I remember you picking me up for our first date. I spent a whole hour getting ready for you. Making sure every hair was in place and my make-up was perfect. When you see me now at the end of the day, the make-up that is left on my face is smeared. My hair is more than likely in a ponytail or some rat’s nest on the top of my head. And my outfit, 100% has someone’s bodily fluids smeared somewhere. But there were days when...

Keep Reading

Stop Being a Butthole Wife

In: Grief, Journal, Marriage, Relationships
Man and woman sit on the end of a dock with arms around each other

Stop being a butthole wife. No, I’m serious. End it.  Let’s start with the laundry angst. I get it, the guy can’t find the hamper. It’s maddening. It’s insanity. Why, why, must he leave piles of clothes scattered, the same way that the toddler does, right? I mean, grow up and help out around here, man. There is no laundry fairy. What if that pile of laundry is a gift in disguise from a God you can’t (yet) see? Don’t roll your eyes, hear me out on this one. I was a butthole wife. Until my husband died. The day...

Keep Reading

I Can’t Be Everyone’s Chick-fil-A Sauce

In: Friendship, Journal, Living, Relationships
woman smiling in the sun

A couple of friends and I went and grabbed lunch at Chick-fil-A a couple of weeks ago. It was delightful. We spent roughly $20 apiece, and our kids ran in and out of the play area barefoot and stinky and begged us for ice cream, to which we responded, “Not until you finish your nuggets,” to which they responded with a whine, and then ran off again like a bolt of crazy energy. One friend had to climb into the play tubes a few times to save her 22-month-old, but it was still worth every penny. Every. Single. One. Even...

Keep Reading

Love Notes From My Mother in Heaven

In: Faith, Grief, Journal, Living
Woman smelling bunch of flowers

Twelve years have passed since my mother exclaimed, “I’ve died and gone to Heaven!” as she leaned back in her big donut-shaped tube and splashed her toes, enjoying the serenity of the river.  Twelve years since I stood on the shore of that same river, 45 minutes later, watching to see if the hopeful EMT would be able to revive my mother as she floated toward his outstretched hands. Twelve years ago, I stood alone in my bedroom, weak and trembling, as I opened my mother’s Bible and all the little keepsakes she’d stowed inside tumbled to the floor.  It...

Keep Reading

Sometimes Friendships End, No Matter How Hard You Try

In: Friendship, Journal, Relationships
Sad woman alone without a friend

I tried. We say these words for two reasons. One: for our own justification that we made an effort to complete a task; and two: to admit that we fell short of that task. I wrote those words in an e-mail tonight to a friend I had for nearly 25 years after not speaking to her for eight months. It was the third e-mail I’ve sent over the past few weeks to try to reconcile with a woman who was more of a sister to me at some points than my own biological sister was. It’s sad when we drift...

Keep Reading

Goodbye to the House That Built Me

In: Grown Children, Journal, Living, Relationships
Ranch style home as seen from the curb

In the winter of 1985, while I was halfway done growing in my mom’s belly, my parents moved into a little brown 3 bedroom/1.5 bath that was halfway between the school and the prison in which my dad worked as a corrections officer. I would be the first baby they brought home to their new house, joining my older sister. I’d take my first steps across the brown shag carpet that the previous owner had installed. The back bedroom was mine, and mom plastered Smurf-themed wallpaper on the accent wall to try to get me to sleep in there every...

Keep Reading