Kids Motherhood

The Helicopter Alternative

The Helicopter Alternative www.herviewfromhome.com
Written by Sarah Morell

We have all heard the term “Helicopter Parent” or “Helicopter Mom,” am I right?

I have always been confident in how I parent our daughter. I have never been one to fuss over a scraped knee or a fall on her bottom. Now that is not to say that we are unresponsive when she does get hurt or scared – we are the first ones to jump in and provide comfort in her times of need. Since becoming a mom, I have had that famous “mom instinct” and have trusted in my gut from day one with my Little One.

One instance stands out in my mind when I think about the topic of Helicopter Parenting. I was one of the lucky mom’s that was able to bring my daughter to work with me everyday. {I work for my father out of his home office.} I work with one other lady who, at the time, was not a parent. I let my daughter {just over a year old at the time} play and roam the house while I worked. The house was completely child proofed, so I was not overly concerned about her getting seriously hurt.

One day, while we were working, Little One was playing down the hall and managed to get into the bathroom. It was quiet for a few minutes, and we all know what that means with toddlers, am I right?  Then, Little One started to yell – not scream or cry – just yell. Being the kind of mother that I am, non-hovering and non-overreacting, walked down the hallway to see what was going on. However, at the exact same time I got up from my desk (at the sound of my daughter’s yell) so did the other secretary I work with. The difference? She ran.

I knew that Little One was not hurt. She was yelling because she got into the bathtub and could not get herself back out. Call it my mom instinct, but I just knew that she was okay. The other secretary was so blown away at my calm reaction to this whole situation. She did not understand why I didn’t run at full speed down the hallway to see why Little One was yelling. She did not understand why I giggled a little bit when I saw that Little One was stuck in the tub. {I mean, it was pretty funny that she got herself in, but couldn’t get back out}

That was the day that I truly understood the meaning of a “helicopter mom.”  From that day on, I made the active decision to not be a “helicopter mom” and let my Little One play independently. I am always watching her, but not always telling her how to play. If she falls down, she learns that climbing has a consequence if you are not careful. 

It is so satisfying to watch her figure something out all by herself. She is so proud when she completes a task all by herself – declaring herself a big girl. We allow her to be independent and use her brain to figure things out instead of us telling her how to solve the problem, or not to climb too high for fear of falling. We are building her self-esteem, her problem solving skills and so much more. When something does happen, we are there to comfort her and reassure her that we are always there for her when she needs us.  

About the author

Sarah Morell

I am a mommy to a very stubborn and energetic 4-year old little girl and I am happily taken by her daddy. We are in the Northern California area and lead a very active life.
I have a full time job as a paralegal, and I am continuing my education and to get my BS in Interior Design – which is what I really want to be doing.
Whether it is writing, drawing or painting, I love to spend my time being creative! My other interests range from reading to constantly redecorating and rearranging the rooms in my home.

Follow my active life through my blog at http://www.oneactivemama.com/