Humor Journal Relationships

Valentine’s Day: Before and After Kids

Valentine’s Day: Before and After Kids www.herviewfromhome.com
Written by Cassie Hilt

The most magical day for couples is upon us….Valentine’s Day. A day where couples all around the world can swoon and canoodle each other, buy overpriced flowers and lobster dinners, and show excessive amounts of P.D.A. without anyone caring.

Anyone with kids knows that Valentine’s Day is most definitely not the same after the tiny humans arrive…

Before Kids: You’d spend hours primping and priming yourself for your man. Shaving, waxing, tweezing, getting your hair done and picking out the hottest outfit with the sexiest matching undergarments.

After Kids: You should probably shave (chances are you haven’t in about a month or so). Waxing? Um, yeah, no thanks, this isn’t the Miss America Pageant. Getting your hair done = washing it (maybe blow drying it if you’re really feeling sexy). You could probably change out of your yoga pants and sweatshirt that has some sort of cheese popcorn fingerprint smudge on them from the toddler. And the sexy lingerie? How about just sans bra and whatever “mom” undies are clean.

Before Kids: You and your partner would have an entire night planned out, something you’d been planning weeks ahead of time. Dinner at a fancy restaurant, a movie and then a romantic evening at home.

After Kids: You both just remembered it was Valentine’s Day last night, so yeah, no reservations for you two. Pizza Hut has heart shaped pizzas though, and you’re always up for those carb filled breadsticks.  Romantic evening = who can outlast the kids to stay awake while we sit on the couch and watch Paw Patrol.

Before Kids: Valentines night activities included lots of foreplay and romance.

After Kids: Valentines night activities include trying to stay awake long enough for the kids to fall asleep so we can have some alone time. Alone time = catching up on episodes of NCIS and Ghost Adventures.  Any sort of adult behavior in the bedroom will instantly awake one of the tiny humans who will immediately run into your bedroom resulting in a cease and desist of all chances of anyone getting lucky.

Despite these differences, all of my Valentine’s Day spent with my kids and hubby are the best ones yet. All the heart shaped paper cards they make me are far better than two dozen red roses. I’m currently sitting on my couch while my daughter plays with her sticker book and my son is sleeping next to my husband who is watching sports center. And there’s no other way I’d rather spend my Valentine’s Day.

This article originally appeared on The Chronicles of Motherhood

About the author

Cassie Hilt

Cassie is a working mother of two small kiddos. She works on maintaining the delicate balance of work/mommy/wife life, and making sure she doesn’t run out of wine before payday. She enjoys writing in her free time and chronicling the adventures of being a mom. You can follow her on Facebook, https://www.facebook.com/thechroniclesofmotherhood Twitter, https://twitter.com/ChronOfMom and Instagram, https://www.instagram.com/the_chronicles_of_motherhood/ and visit her website http://www.cassiehilt.com/