Mamas of teenagers: you’ll be “cool” again soon, I promise.
To young children, it doesn’t get cooler than your mom. She takes you neat places, makes you all your favorite foods, and is your favorite person in the whole world. My mom has always been my safe landing space and I’ve always loved her more than words can explain, but I’d be lying if I said I don’t remember what I was like as a teenager. Moody, a little self-centered (OK, a lot), and my mom was definitely not someone I wanted to hang out with all the time.
I’m not sure when it changed.
She was my whole world and then all of a sudden my priorities shifted to friends and going out. There came a point in my life when I no longer wanted her advice, no longer wanted to share everything with her, and definitely no longer wanted to go places with her over my friends.
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Don’t get me wrong, I still loved her with all my heart but every teen goes through this stage where mom becomes “uncool.” Looking back now, even though my teenage years were hard at times for me, I now know how much harder it must have been for my mom. All of a sudden your child isn’t a baby anymore and you start to wonder if they’re slipping away for good. All of a sudden they no longer think you’re the best thing in the world and boy is that a hard pill to swallow.
I’m here to tell you though, parents of teens in this phase, that this too shall pass. Right now you may fight with them, not see eye to eye, and feel like you’ve lost them.
But I promise, they’re going to come running back.
I know this because I did.
As I passed my teenage years and grew into an adult, I took little steps back toward my mom. I started listening to her advice again because well, I finally saw I actually didn’t know it all (gasp). She helped me figure out how to pick the right college, go after my dream career, pick out what I needed for my first apartment, and handle relationships. She shaped me into a responsible young adult.
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And when I became a mom myself, well, I sprinted back. She was there to help me navigate those first few weeks with a newborn, she was the one I called when I was worried about my baby’s first diaper rash, their first fever, and everything in between.
She was there to drop off a warm meal I didn’t know I needed and tell me to go enjoy a hot shower while she rocked the baby. I finally knew, I could see the whole picture.
I needed my mom now more than ever.
Turns out she did know it all and then some!
I’m almost in my thirties now and I’m closer to my mom than I’ve ever been before. She gives me the most valuable life advice, and she’s definitely cooler than me. She spoils my kids, peps me up when I’m having a hard day, and always has an open door and open arms. I want to be with her all the time . . . so much so that I live on her street!
So if you’re sitting here thinking your teen no longer needs you, well, that couldn’t be farther from the truth. The way your child needs you will come in waves and change, but they will always, always need their mama.
Oh, and one day soon you will be “cool” again, I promise.