By Emaline Ashe 
About a year before my son was born, I’d given up the dream of becoming a parent. The road to parenthood for my husband and me was long and strenuous. There were many unexpected potholes, detours, and U-turns on our multi-year struggle to become parents. Our journey differed from many friends who wanted to expand their families. For most of them, their journeys were relatively smooth and traffic-free. Some even drove that route several times without complications, which resulted in multiple children.
But not us. We rode on a hellish, infertile highway for years. During year seven, I’d had all the heartache I could endure and pulled the emergency brake. Soon after giving up on the road to parenthood, a miracle happened; we learned about the possibility of adopting Aiden. And three months later, we brought Aiden home from the hospital.
Becoming a parent taught me my first lesson: good things come to those who wait, but amazing things can come to those who really wait.
Aiden taught me how to love unconditionally. My love for him grew quickly, and his needs promptly became a priority over my own.
I learned to be functional at 4 a.m. each morning when he arose refreshed and ready to tackle his toddler day. More importantly, I learned to prioritize staying home to care for him over my demanding career as a biologist. I realize I was fortunate to have that choice.
Aiden taught me that a lot can come from gently observing. As a child, he often hung out on the playground and watched others. It took my husband and me a little while to understand that Aiden was enjoying his playground experience even while staying still. He wasn’t always an active participant, but he constantly absorbed all around him.
Aiden taught us that every child is uniquely special. There is no magic formula for what a thriving child looks like. A quiet and stationary child can have just as much fun as a boisterous and active one.
Aiden taught me to let go of my fear of failure. He pursues what interests him, regardless of whether he thinks he will succeed. He has tried all kinds of sports, including baseball, swimming, karate, surfing, and roller hockey. Last year, I joined a Citizens Academy program at our local Sheriff’s department. I wouldn’t have done that if not for Aiden. Raising Aiden has helped me grow and stretch in ways I never thought possible.
I’ve learned to slow down and take life in, just like Aiden did on the playground all those years ago. I’ve learned that being a mom is the hardest job I’ve ever loved. Parenthood touches the deepest parts of your soul and takes all your energy to truly be present for your child.
As Aiden’s graduation from high school looms on the horizon, I’ve learned that a mother’s heart is never, ever ready to see their child fly away from the nest. Letting our children go is a tremendous act of love; one that slowly breaks our hearts over and over again. Being a parent is a tremendous privilege. It is an important responsibility that I don’t take lightly.
We are our children’s first teachers. The flip side is that we, as parents, can learn from our children. Our sons and daughters have so much to teach us. We can learn by slowing down, gently observing who our children are as individuals, and letting them be who they uniquely are. By honoring what makes them unique, we can open ourselves to learning some very important life lessons.
Thank you, Aiden, for being my greatest teacher, one who was more than worth the wait.
by Arianna Freelen 
