Our Keepsake Journal is Here! 🎉

I am sitting here staring at my pumping supplies. Wondering how it all went by so fast. Wondering why I feel this nostalgic. After all, it wasn’t even a month ago I was ever so ready for the finish line. Indeed, between two back-to-back pregnancies, and pumping for both babies for their first year of life, my body has not been exclusively my own for a little over three years. And yet, I am still tearing up. Because I realize, I am letting go. My second baby girl is also my last baby, and yet neither of my baby girls are really babies anymore.

My phone buzzes. It’s my friend, with her newest baby girl. With her first, she had chosen formula—but this go around, she wanted to give breast milk a try. And she is desperate for advice. I let myself smile. Oh, how I remember those early days. I end my reply to her with, “If I could do it, you can. You got this, mama.”

RELATED: Sometimes Breastfeeding Means Exclusively Pumping

Why would I say that?

Because I know the pain of sore, cracked nipples.

Because I know the desperation of trying to keep up with a tiny human’s hunger and need to grow, especially since she had been born underweight.

Because I remember sinking down onto my kitchen floor, sobbing because I really wanted my baby exclusively on breast milk, but supplementing with formula was a must until I could catch up again. Fed is best.

Because I remember the heart-wrenching moment when four ounces of hard-worked-for breast milk fell to the floor, followed by a never-ending stream of my own tears.

Because I know the exhaustion of waking up for a pumping session even if the baby didn’t wake since a skipped feeding time was an opportunity to get ahead on my milk supply.

Because I know the discomfort of mastitis.

Because I remember making it to my 6-week goal, which turned into my 6-month goal, which turned into my 1-year goal.

Because I know the reason the 6-month goal turned into a 1-year goal with my first was that she reacted poorly to formula, and I simply had no other choice.

Because I know the reason the 6-month goal turned into a 1-year goal with my second was that we were in the middle of a pandemic, and I feared a scarce supply of formula.

Because I remember the utter frustration of thinking, Why is it there is plenty of help for nursing moms, but for exclusively pumping moms like me, I am left with Google and trial and error?!

Because I remember the guilt trips people tried to put on me for choosing not to nurse past four months with either baby and sticking with exclusively pumping. “They get more of the good stuff when they are on the breast.” And yet, both babies were off the growth charts, healthy as can be, complete with chunky rolls, determined to take after their 6-foot, 4-inch daddy’s genes.

RELATED: I Wish Someone Would Have Told Me This About Breastfeeding

And I remember the joy of eventually having 50-60 ounces of stored breast milk in my fridge when my baby averaged 40 ounces a day. Remembering the early struggles of pumping even 2-4 ounces, this was the epitome of truly satisfying, maternal bliss.

I remember. I know.

Three years of two tiny humans relying on me for sustenance.

And to the nursing and pumping mamas reading this—You’ve. Got. This.

Because I know if I can do it, you can too.

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Check out our new Keepsake Companion Journal that pairs with our So God Made a Mother book!

Order Now
So God Made a Mother's Story Keepsake Journal

A Cogent

I am a blessed wife and working mama to two little girls, who are 18 months apart in age. Vocationally, I am a medical laboratory scientist; however, my favorite hobby is writing, highly influenced by my journey as a formerly single mom navigating beyond various traumas in my life. My sole purpose is to reach the one person who needs to know she is not alone.

The Not So Talked About Side of Breastfeeding

In: Kids, Motherhood
The Not So Talked About Side of Breastfeeding www.herviewfromhome.com

Exclusively pumping sucks…LITERALLY! It is the not so talked about side of breastfeeding, but I did it and would do it again if I needed too! My daughter was born in April of 2014 with heart conditions causing her not to be able to nurse. Breastfeeding had been my plan from the beginning of my pregnancy and I quickly had to wrap my mind around that I would still be breastfeeding, but just in a different way. The pump became my best friend and my worst enemy! I had never heard of exclusively pumping before having Ellie, but quickly found...

Keep Reading

5 Ways Breastfeeding Moms can Pump More Milk

In: Health, Kids, Motherhood
5 Ways Breastfeeding Moms can Pump More Milk www.herviewfromhome.com

I spent last week frantically pumping for my 4-month-old, in anticipation of a many hour separation over the weekend. I was beginning to become overwhelmed and frustrated because I hate pumping, and it’s hard!  I am blessed to be a stay-at-home-mom so I don’t have to make pumping part of my daily life. But many moms do. And I know these moms are always looking for ways to increase their milk output.  First of all, it is so important to understand milk production. An output of just an ounce or two total is so normal if it is in addition...

Keep Reading

Heartfelt Frida Mom Ad Showing Raw, Messy Reality of Breastfeeding Will Air on Golden Globes

In: Baby, Motherhood

Disclaimer: Post contains sensitive content and uncensored, real depictions of women breastfeeding. One of my most powerful memories of breastfeeding takes place in a dingy, poorly-lit bathroom in the Army Reserve Center where I was at weekend drill, trying to pump milk for my 5-month-old daughter at home. I stood in front of the sink attached to a whirring pump while I carefully laid out all the necessary supplies on the counter: my special bottle warmer without an auto-shutoff, a digital thermometer, a stainless steel bottle, and a plastic bowl full of icy water. Other soldiers trickled in and out...

Keep Reading