A Gift for Mom! 🤍

I found out I was pregnant with our third child on August 28, 2020. Which means– you guessed it–this baby was conceived in the era of COVID-19 and quarantine.  When we announced our pregnancy, we were bombarded with the same congratulations and excitement we received with the first two but we also received many a smirk or flat out laughter with one of these sentiments attached:

 “Oh, you’re having a COVID baby!”

“You going to name it Corona if it’s a girl?”

“HAHA, a quarantine baby!”

“You know there are gonna be lots of pregnancy announcements comin’ out of this year . . . if you know what I mean.”

Etc. Etc.

RELATED: You’ll Never Forget Having a Baby in 2020

And I jovially chuckled along, nodding as though confirming, “Yes, yes, this baby was conceived because we were so bored while both working from home and simultaneously keeping our two small children occupied, all we did was have sex all day long for months on end. That’s of course how this baby was conceived.”

I know, I know. Our friends and family joking along with us have nothing but good intentions, and my feelings are not that fragile. Believe me, I chuckled in the same manner when finding out about our happy surprise. But the further I’ve progressed into this pregnancy, the more I’ve truly thought about what we are saying about these babies who are starting to be born into the world, and the jokes have become less and less funny.

Because these babiesthe one currently kicking my insides and giving me the beginnings of heartburn and the one your friend just announced on Facebook?

They don’t deserve to be nicknamed after a disease that’s killing people at an unprecedented rate, after the pandemic that has shut down businesses and caused mental health around the globe to plummet. They don’t deserve to be joked about like they were all accidents that just happened because we were forced to be home more.

They don’t deserve it, and it’s just not true.

This article by USA Today states that the rates of pregnancies during 2020 has actually gone DOWN, and that there are estimated to be around 300,000 FEWER babies born in 2021 than usual. They refer to it as a “baby-bust” as opposed to the “baby-boom” commonly joked about.

There are many hypotheses about why this is the reality–financial stress on families, relationship strain from being home so much, families wanting to postpone bringing another life into the current state of the world, etc. All of these are valid reasons for people to choose not to get pregnant. But it just goes to show that those of us who did get pregnant, whether it be a pregnancy answering years of prayer, a stressful addition, or a happy surprise . . . these pregnancies and these babies?  

These babies were conceived despite COVID-19 and quarantinenot because of it.

RELATED: Dear 2020 Baby, You Changed Everything

So, as a whole. As a society. Can we please stop calling these precious lives that have been conceived during this time “COVID Babies”?

These babies deserve more from us. These babies are special. They represent everything COVID-19 is not.

In a time of darkness and hopelessness, these babies represent hope and the future. In a time of isolation and loneliness, these babies are the result of connection and intimacy. In a time of division and side-picking, these babies can be bridge builders. In a time of pain, sickness and death, these babies will be living, breathing proof that Life with a capital “L” did not end during 2020. In fact, life could be, and was, created. These babies are a slap in the face of this virusof the overall darkness that was the year 2020. 

These babies should be celebrated.

As the weary world rejoices at the close of 2020 and celebrates the beginning of a new year that brings the hope of vaccines and hopefully a way forward, a generation of hope bringers is starting to literally be born.

Hope bringers and light shiners.

The babies conceived despite a pandemic.

RELATED: Dear 2020 Baby—Thank You For Being a Light In the Darkness

Starting to be born right at the beginning of the new year.

Hope.

So, for the remainder of my, probably last, pregnancy, I will defend my little light shiner. I will correct people when they say he is a COVID or quarantine baby. 

Correct them and say he, along with all the other babies of his time, is a hope bringer.

A hope bringer about to be born into a world so desperately in need of hope.

So God Made a Grandmother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Order Now!

Kiley Hillner

Kiley Hillner lives in Texas with her husband, two beautifully lively daughters, and sweetest baby boy. She works full time and has her MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling. She is loving life and embracing the chaotic beauty of motherhood. You can find more of her thoughts on this parenting gig on her blog and on Facebook.

Your Worth As a Mother Is Not Defined By How You Feed Your Baby

In: Baby, Motherhood
Mother and baby stand by crib

I’m not breastfeeding my baby. I wanted to. And I was able to for the first several weeks of her life. But as the days went on, I could tell it wasn’t enough for her anymore, so we started supplementing. And sure enough, without warning, she began screaming through nursing sessions, but was satisfied with a bottle. And that’s when I knew what I needed to do. A similar situation also happened with my first. She didn’t gain her birth weight back on my milk alone, so I had no choice but to supplement right away. And before I knew...

Keep Reading

I May Let Go of the Baby Things, but I’ll Hold the Memories Forever

In: Baby, Motherhood
Woman looking through closet of baby items

It’s easy to think of multiple sayings and mottos about how invaluable earthly possessions are. “It’s not what you have, but who you share it with” “Worry less about things and more about experiences” “Who cares what you have, you can’t take it with you when you go” And trust me, I know these to be true. I am not a hoarder of hotel pens or mini shampoo bottles or every receipt and coaster from my favorite restaurants. I don’t care much for name-brand shoes or designer purses, yet there are a few things I just can’t easily let go...

Keep Reading

I Didn’t Know You Were My Last Baby When I Had You

In: Baby, Motherhood
Mother holding newborn baby, black and white image

I didn’t know at the time that my last baby would be my last. Those late nights with little sleep. The days that felt so long, yet so full all at the same time. The pain that came with trying to breastfeed and wanting so badly for it to work. Learning who was truly there for you in moments that felt lonely. I didn’t know my body would never feel those first flutters again—or experience the emotional joy of meeting your baby face to face after nine months of waiting. I think that’s why I want so badly to experience...

Keep Reading

To My Angel Babies

In: Baby, Loss
Photo frame with ultrasound image

To my three angel babies, From the moment I saw that first positive pregnancy test, you became a part of me. You were never just an idea, a hope, or a dream—you were my babies. I loved you from the very beginning, and I still do. Not a day passes that I don’t think of you or pray for you. I dreamt of watching you grow up with your big brother, dreamt of who you would become, and all the memories we’d make. You may have been tiny, but the dreams I had for you were not. To some, you...

Keep Reading

Having a Holiday Baby Is Extra Special

In: Baby, Motherhood
Newborn baby in santa hat sleeping with lights around him

“That’s right, my secondborn will have mashed potato cakes every year for his birthday,” I say with a forced laugh, knowing exactly how cheesy I sound. My husband and I didn’t exactly plan for a holiday baby, but here we are. Our due date is November 21st, so depending on the year, our son may often share a birthday party with the holiday of gratitude and pumpkin everything. When people find out when we are expecting, the responses are usually mixed, like they’re unsure what to say. These statements range anywhere from a slightly sarcastic “Oh, that will be a...

Keep Reading

I’d Given Up on Getting Pregnant‚ But Hope Had Other Plans

In: Baby, Motherhood
Ultrasound photo of early pregnancy

This is the story I wish someone had shared with me when I was losing all hope. I never imagined I would be the one writing this. But here I am, opening up about something that once felt too painful to say out loud. A truth I believed I would carry silently forever: I had given up on becoming pregnant. After five years. Five years that left me emotionally worn out, physically drained, financially stretched, and spiritually defeated. Five years that included five separate rounds of ovulation-stimulating medication. (I’m purposely leaving out the name to protect others from self-medicating.) Eventually,...

Keep Reading

It’s a Good Day To Celebrate Your Rainbow Baby

In: Baby, Grief, Motherhood
Rainbow baby lying on blanket with onesie that says "rainbow"

Dear Mama, Today, take a moment for yourself. A moment to reflect on this powerful journey. And just soak it in. Soak every single second of it in. Hold that baby a little longer. A little tighter. Smell their sweet little head and stare into their big, beautiful eyes. Whether it’s been a day, a week, a month, or longer since that precious little life joined the world, chances are it’s flying by. So take a minute to slow down, soak it in, and celebrate. Celebrate this little miracle you prayed for so hard. This little human you and your...

Keep Reading

What Comes after the NICU? Sometimes It’s the Struggle No One Sees.

In: Baby, Motherhood
Mother sitting beside preemie in a NICU basinette

They clap when you bring the baby home—finally, miraculously, out of the NICU. They celebrate the milestones, the trials overcome, and mark the battle as won. You made it. You’re home. You’re okay, the baby’s okay. But what about what comes after? What about the silence that follows the storm? The slow, aching process of unpacking trauma no one talks about, and few understand. The wounds no one sees. The moments you’re expected to be grateful when you’re still gasping for air. The days spent trying to be okay, when so much of the past few months have been very...

Keep Reading

Surprise! I’m 42 and Pregnant.

In: Baby, Motherhood
Pregnant woman holding belly, black and white image

Seven years after I gave birth to my youngest child, I made an appointment with my primary care physician. I was 42, had been sick and fatigued, and thought I might have diabetes, thyroid cancer, or be going into menopause. When she asked if I could be pregnant, I laughed. I mean, it had been six months since my husband and I had been intimate—not the recipe for pregnancy. Then, the hCG test came back at 66,000. Shocked doesn’t even begin to encompass my feelings. A little backstory: When our youngest was two, my husband and I tried for a...

Keep Reading

To the Moms of COVID Babies Turning Five

In: Baby, Motherhood
Elevator door in hospital during COVID-19 pandemic

To the mamas of babies now turning five, the ones born during the height of the COVID-19 pandemic. Alone, masked, giving birth in a hospital filled with fear and protocols. Some of you left through back hallways or maintenance elevators—quiet exits where there should’ve been balloons and cheers. The ones with no hospital visitors, no sibling introductions, no joyful flood of family holding your newborn. No newborn photos, no parties, no sweet “welcome to the world” celebrations. Just fear. Isolation. Quiet. Survival. You missed out on moments you dreamed of. And if that baby was your last, it might ache...

Keep Reading