Dear Bully,
Hello. Do you remember me? Well, maybe you don’t remember me, but I remember you.
I remember all of the emotional pain you caused. You taunted and tormented me. Your words cut me like a knife. You rallied others against me. You went out of your way to embarrass me, to strip me of all my confidence and self-worth. You almost won. The thought of going to school would make me feel physically ill. You transformed school into my hell on earth.
I’ll be honest, I recently looked you up on social media. Not in the creepy-stalker way, but the child in me was curious about what you’ve been up to. I owed it to my inner child as a way to achieve some sort of closure.
I wondered about the level of your success. I’m not sure how one measures another’s success, but part of me hoped you were unhappy because you tried so hard to steal my happiness when we were children.
I found your page. I didn’t expect to forgive you for all the hurt you caused. I changed classes because of you. I was shy to begin with and your teasing caused me to recede further into my shell. Only when I escaped from your clutches was I able to breathe again. How could I possibly forgive you?
I saw a photo of you with your daughter.
I, too, have a daughter. I pray no one ever makes my daughter feel as little as you made me feel. You may be surprised to learn I also pray your daughter will never have to encounter a bully like you.
I hope you do better. I can’t hold you one hundred percent accountable for your actions. Children look to the adults in their lives for approval and if the adults condone their behavior, it will likely continue.
Your mother and our delusional teacher saw nothing wrong with your actions. “There is a hierarchy,” said the teacher.
I hope having a child of your own has humbled you. I know there is no worse feeling in this world than having your child hurt and being unable to do anything about it. That’s how my mother felt so many years ago. Your mother didn’t understand.
I hope you now understand. I hope if you discover your daughter is being cruel, you will do better. I hope you will discourage any toxic behavior and teach her to be empathetic. Likewise, if my daughter is ever the one being cruel, I promise I will do the same.
We must do better. I hope that, years from now, neither of our daughters will have hurt enough to have to write a letter to their childhood bully. I pray neither of us ever has to worry about our children being teased. If one day our paths cross again, I hope it is under better circumstances and we will set a positive example for our children.
Sincerely,
An Old Friend