So here we are again. We blinked and suddenly everywhere we turn there are pink hearts and red roses and all things lovey-dovey.

As a first-time Mom, I’m slowly finding how my thoughts and ideas of holidays continue to change as I now look at them through the eyes of a child. This one is no exception. As a girl mom in particular, I find myself looking at Valentine’s Day a little differently and thinking about what I really want my daughter to know about the 14th of February.

At four years old, Valentine’s Day is as cute as it gets. I’m anxiously awaiting that mommy and me trip to Target to pick out little cards for all her friends and classmates. I’m looking forward to all things red and pink in the arts and crafts department. I’m even willing to put aside the “new year, new me” diet routine in exchange for an afternoon of chocolate-covered strawberry making.

But the tiniest little piece of my love filled heart breaks knowing it’s not always going to be like this. It’s not always going to be cute and sweet and carefree. It won’t always be days of endless Valentines to and from everyone in her class. One day that little girl is going to grow and is going to feel the pressure of a big girl Valentine’s Day. There’s nothing I can do to stop it but I can set the stage now to help ease it just a little bit.

RELATED: 11 Lessons For Kids About Love On Valentine’s Day

I want my daughter to find that perfect balance. I don’t want her to downplay the day, but I also don’t want her to grow up with impossible standards surrounding it. I want her to celebrate love, any and every kind, on this day. But I also want her to understand it’s important to do that every single day.

I want her to both get AND give flowers or chocolates or whatever it is she enjoys most. But I also want her to know that those gifts don’t define the day or HER in any way. I want her to celebrate it however she wants, with whoever she wants. Secretly, I wish Mama (and Daddy) will always be her #1 Valentine. I know that’s completely unrealistic, but I want her to know it’s true.  

I want her to feel loved and show love on this day just a little more than others. I want her to remember the magic of these younger years and cling to it. To not let the harsh realities and heartbreak of a grown-up world ruin it for her. I want her to celebrate it as big or as small as she wants. If it brings her joy, it’s what I want for her. Personally, I am a believer in celebrating everything. I know it’s not for everyone, but it’s for me and I want to share that with my daughter and let her know it’s okay to feel the same way. It’s also okay to feel the exact opposite.

I want her to know her romantic relationship (or lack thereof) is in no way a measurement of her or her character. She is beautiful and bright and has so much to offer the world outside of her love life. This is true 365 days a year, not just on Valentine’s Day and I will remind her of it as often as I have to.

RELATED: Valentine’s Day Gift Ideas for Teens

At the end of the day, what I want her to know about Valentine’s Day is what I want her to know every day: how much love really matters. In any and every way. With any and everybody who holds a place in her heart. It’s at the core of our home and we want her to always keep that with her. Sometimes that might look like a day filled with chocolates and flowers and decorations. Sometimes it might not. There is nothing wrong either way and I want her to know that.

And I want her to know she is always, always going to be our little Valentine.

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

You should also check out our new Keepsake Companion Journal that pairs with our So God Made a Mother book!

Order Now
So God Made a Mother's Story Keepsake Journal

Megan LaPorta

Hi! I am the mama of a 4-year-old daughter. I have recently made the jump from the corporate world to full-time mom life. I've always had a passion for writing & am so glad to be able to share it!

Dear Husband, This is What Your Wife Really Wants For Valentine’s Day

In: Marriage
Man and woman embrace in forest

This is what your wife wants for Valentine’s Day: She wants a break. A few hours or a massage (when the kids are awake—this should not be during nap time). This should not cut into the little reprieve she gets, this should be extra. A night away at a hotel would be ideal. Could be a mile down the road. Uninterrupted sleep, TV, and snacks will do wonders for a woman who eats last and gets to dream very little. She wants to know you think she deserves it, that you see how hard she works. That you notice everything...

Keep Reading

I Want My Kids To Feel My Love Every Day

In: Kids
Smiling little boy with cutout hearts on table

It started with a note I wrote for my son while we were practicing his letters one day. You make my heart happy. “What does that say, Mom?” he asked. As I read it back to him, his eyes lit up and a smile spread across his face. He beamed just as big when I wrote, “You are special,” out of the magnets on his dry-erase board a few days later. I started leaving more notes, and his reactions were priceless every time. The thing is, he’s used to hearing me say I love you several times a day, but...

Keep Reading

7 Tips for Surviving Valentine’s Day when Your Relationship Sucks

In: Mental Health, Relationships
7 Tips for Surviving Valentine's Day when Your Relationship Sucks

I don’t know why you feel like your relationship sucks this Valentine’s Day. I don’t know if this is just a really hard season you need to push through to get to wonderful, connected intimacy on the other side or if this is a relationship where you need to cut your losses and move on. I don’t know, but I trust your best friend and your mom probably have an opinion and maybe it’s worth listening to. But for whatever reason you find yourself in a frustrating situation, just know I get it and I’m not here to judge. Sometimes...

Keep Reading