I have always been intrigued by “nepo babies,” probably because it’s a funny name for an even funnier concept. In case you don’t know what it is, a “nepo baby” refers to a person who benefits from nepotism, usually in the entertainment industry. This term highlights individuals who gain opportunities or advantages due to their family connections.
But I also get caught up in the fact that just because your parent is great at something, it doesn’t mean you can’t earn that skill or title, fair and square, on your own. And vice versa, it doesn’t automatically mean that you’re good at their thing either.
My kids are technically “nepo babies.” I think I always knew it, even if I didn’t officially connect the dots.
My husband is a Division I college coach. And in that world, I always knew there could be people who wanted to be close to us because they thought there might be value in it. And then when we had kids, I could see how their friends saw what we took for granted as a typical occurrence as something that would be a highlight of their lifetime. And that meant not everyone was into being their friends for the right reasons.
Normally, I just laugh it off, because our opportunities and advantages are not based on anything of real value.
Two of our three kids now play the sport my husband coaches. One is a girl, so she is not directly tied to that “nepo” piece because it’s a very similar but very different game for girls. So, she’s been able to be seen for her natural skill level and love of the game.
But my son plays too, and he is now stepping into his father’s shadow.
He put off playing for as long as he could, partly because he has his mama’s rebellious heart and didn’t want to do what was “expected” of him. But partly because he was having so much fun just being a kid, he wasn’t interested in spending all his free time practicing, improving, and obsessing over one thing.
He’s trying out for the travel team this week. And that’s what made me realize what he will have to deal with the rest of his athletic career. They were going to let him join the team without a tryout. Just him, though; everyone else would have to earn their spot the old-fashioned way.
He said absolutely not. He wasn’t going to take the easy path. He wanted to try out and deserve the spot he got.
I don’t think I’ve ever been prouder of him. Actually, I have, because it was related to being kind and inclusive as a middle school boy. But that’s a story for a different day.
Maybe that’s why there are many successful nepo babies, as well as entitled, talentless ones. It starts with the parents and what they truly value.
Just because my son chose the best approach to managing the nepo cloud doesn’t mean others will see or believe that. He will always have to deal with it, whether it’s fair or not; it doesn’t matter. That’s just the way it will be.
Like it or not, find the term hilarious or not, as long as he wants to play, he will always be a “nepo baby.”
So, I guess what I’m asking is not just for him. Yes, I am lightheartedly referring to children whose parents are actually famous. But mostly, I’m talking about the ones you have to think a little harder about to connect the dots as to why you assume what you assume—the quarterback’s son, the dance teacher’s daughter, the pastor’s kid, the boss’s child.
See the person behind the term. Stop yourself once you naturally assume something about him or her. Evaluate their skill and talent with an open mind, not clouded by the shadow they were born into.
by Jordan Harrell 
by Carolyn Moore 
