I Am The Mom Everyone Tells You Not To Be

Hi, my name is Gina, and I’m the mom everyone tells you not to be.

Allow me to introduce myself; I’m a mother of three boys, who range in age from 16 months to ten years. My hobbies include anything that will satisfy my need for creativity. I love to pack my kids fun and creative food for school, I enjoy DIY projects and crafts, and also love planning parties and celebrating pretty much everything. I’m also a writer, and I share my love for the kinds of things I mentioned above, on my blog at GinaKirk.com. However, I’ve noticed a trend among writers, mothers, and bloggers lately – and they all seem to be pointing in a similar direction, my direction. It turns out; I’m the mom that they are telling you not to be.

I am the mom who sends cute food into their kid’s class.

I am the mom who packs fun little bento boxes.

I am the mom who celebrates birthdays with a big, huge, gigantic bash, and with a cake and dessert table I created myself.

I am the mom who bakes homemade cookies for my neighbors.

I am the mom who makes handprint and footprint crafts with my toddler.

I am the mom everyone tells you not to be.

I am not perfect, nor do I strive to be.

I am not supermom, nor do I want to be called that.

I am not putting on a show, nor am I looking for attention.

I do what I do, because I love to do it.

I don’t judge other moms by what they send in for school snacks.

It doesn’t bother me to attend a party with a store bought cake and no party favors.

I don’t critique other moms based on what type of activities they do with their kids.

I do what I do, because my kids enjoy it.

Somewhere along the beaten path of the motherhood, someone thought they could encourage and empower other mothers by telling them that they don’t have to do the things I do in order to be a good mom.

They’re right, you don’t.

What many people don’t realize, however, is that that message can be hurtful to those of us who do these things. Since when does creativity equal perfectionism? There are so many beautiful, talented, creative moms out there who actually enjoy making cute food, or party planning, or crafting – and have never done any of those things to make other moms feel bad about themselves. They’ve never tried to impose their hobbies, or ways on anyone else, or claimed to be a perfect mom, and they’re quite happy doing what they love.

Please stop mom shaming.

Being a mom is the hardest job I have ever had. I don’t want to be a perfect mom. I don’t want to be judged by how I pack lunch or celebrate birthdays. At the end of the day, I do what I do because I love it, and because my kids love it, not because I’m striving for perfection.

Isn’t that what it’s really all about?