Our Keepsake Journal is Here! 🎉

I’m not ready to say goodbye to one.

One has been a year full of fun and laughter. This year of toddlerhood made right all the things that felt wrong through the difficult year of infancy. It deepened my love for you with every smile and broadened my pride with every accomplished milestone.

We’ve come a long way this year, you and I. We have grown as individuals, both finding our own confidence as we discovered who we wereyou as a person and me as a mama. Each day a new piece of your personality developed, and it was a delight to get a front-row seat to watching you become you.

RELATED: They Tell You To Hold the Baby, But No One Warns You How Fast He Grows

You explored your world with wonder and curiosity in your eyes and you taught me to find awe in the little things too. We found that Saturdays are better when they start with dance parties in the kitchen and summer nights are ended best with a popsicle on the back porch while we watch fireflies.

We both learned lessons in patience and self-control, and you reminded me to check my own heart even as I was correcting yours.

I vowed to do my best to be your safe place, somewhere you could run to with every emotion and find comfort and peace. You proved to be the same with your unwavering loyalty and babyish grin. I will forever treasure these days where a kiss from me will cure any hurt and a hug from you can quiet the chaos of my grown-up world.

RELATED: The Secret No One Told Me About the Toddler Years is How Much I Could Absolutely Love Them

I love our little life together in its simplicity and sweetness. You have grown so much and come so far in this year that seemed so very short. Your little legs that started the year wobbly and uncertain now run, jump, kick, and dance with abandon. You went from helpless to helper as you jump into cleaning every spill, collecting laundry, and running little errands around the house.

With each passing day, I have watched you become less baby and more child, but the memory of your dimpled little fingers pointing out the window, the way your little voice fumbles words that are only barely recognizable as the word you are trying to say, and the feel of your downy head on my shoulder as I sing you to sleep are forever branded in this mama’s heart.

These are the moments of perfection.

Yes, this year your vocabulary expanded and so did my heart. Your independence increased and so did my joy. Although my heart is not ready to let go of sweet one, I also look forward to the wonders that two will hold. One taught me there is simply no re-do, rewind, or even a pause on time, so I will do my best to not waste a single second of two. I will savor every trace of your babyhood that is leftthe pudgy little legs, the need for mama’s comfort, the belly laugh. But I will also celebrate every glimpse of childhoodthe mastered skill, the blooming imagination, the conquered fear.

RELATED: I Hope I Loved You Enough Today

Saying goodbye to this first year of toddlerhood is anything but easy. I feel my heart still clinging to it every day we have left. Despite my hesitation to say goodbye, I am certain this second year will bring just as much joy, as many lessons, and even more love as we continue to grow together.

So, happy birthday dear baby! It’s time for our next big adventure.

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Check out our new Keepsake Companion Journal that pairs with our So God Made a Mother book!

Order Now
So God Made a Mother's Story Keepsake Journal

Brianna Forsman

Brianna is a pastor's wife and stay-at-home mom to a rambunctious toddler and new baby. As a former preschool teacher, she is a Pixar enthusiast, eats way too many Goldfish crackers, and prefers socks with characters on them (generally mismatched because who really has time to pair socks?). She has loved writing for as long as she can remember, and she always strives to write authentic, humorous, and encouraging pieces. Her greatest passion is to write in a way that supports young moms and reminds them they're not alone in the battles and triumphs of this beautiful road of motherhood.

This is the Bittersweet Goodbye to the Baby Years

In: Baby, Motherhood, Toddler
Little girl pushing toddler brother in baby swing, color photo

Last August, I had my last baby. Oof. Even typing those words makes my heart ache. There’s something so final, so sad, so unreal about acknowledging the end of having babies. Maybe it’s because I’m the type of person who likes to keep all the doors open. I love possibilities. I hate goodbyes. And this, my friends, feels like a very hard goodbye. When I think about being done having kids, it feels like a goodbye to the baby years. For six years now, all I’ve known is the baby years. And while the baby years can drain me and...

Keep Reading

Sometimes God Sends a Double Rainbow

In: Baby, Loss, Motherhood
Two sacs as seen in early pregnancy sonogram

I lay on the ultrasound table prepared to hear the worst. While this pregnancy wasn’t totally expected, it was a miracle for me. I knew with the current stress in my life and the symptoms of a miscarriage, I may have to face another heartbreak to my series of heartbreaks over the last two years. I questioned what I did wrong to deserve it all. I prayed I had been stronger in my prior life: to have made better decisions. So I lay there, I held my breath, and I waited as the tech put the cold jelly over my...

Keep Reading

When Your Baby becomes a Big Boy

In: Baby, Motherhood, Toddler
Toddler boy smiling with hoodie on

My son recently learned how to climb out of things, so I asked my husband to take the side off the crib to convert it to a toddler bed today. I snapped one last picture of my son in his crib before I hurried off to get him dressed for school. As I got to work, I saw my husband had sent me a text of the transformed crib, and it just about killed me. I know, I know . . . what even changed? It pretty much looks the same. But it’s more than just the side of the...

Keep Reading

I Know This Baby Is Our Last and It’s Bittersweet

In: Baby, Motherhood, Toddler
Woman snuggling baby by window

Three is our magic number. It always has been. It feels like the perfect number of kids for us. Everyone who belongs around my dinner table is here. Our family is complete. And yet even though my family is complete, I still find myself grieving that this is our last baby just a little bit as I pack up the teeny, tiny newborn onesies and socks. I’ve folded up swaddle blankets that saw us through the all-nighters of the newborn phase, ready to be passed along to a new baby in someone else’s family. But they won’t be swaddled around...

Keep Reading

I Wasn’t Sure You’d Be Here To Hold

In: Baby, Motherhood
Mother with newborn baby on her chest in hospital bed

I stood naked in my parents’ bathroom. Even with the tub filling, I could hear my family chattering behind the door. I longed to be with them, not hiding alone with my seven-month round belly, sleep-deprived, and covered in pox-like marks. For three weeks, I’d tried Benadryl, lotions, and other suggested remedies to cure the strange rash spreading over my body. No luck. By Christmas Day, my life had been reduced to survival. Day and night, I tried to resist itching, but gave in, especially in my sleep. At 1 a.m., 2 a.m., 3 a.m., the feeling of fire ants...

Keep Reading

No One Warned Me About the Last Baby

In: Baby, Kids, Motherhood
Mother holding newborn baby, black-and-white photo

No one warned me about the last baby. When I had my first, my second, and my third, those first years were blurry from sleep deprivation and chaos from juggling multiple itty-bitties. But the last baby? There’s a desperation in that newborn fog to soak it up because there won’t be another. No one warned me about the last baby. Selling the baby swing and donating old toys because we wouldn’t need them crushed me. I cried selling our double jogger and thought my heart would split in two when I dropped off newborn clothes. Throwing out pacifiers and bottles...

Keep Reading

My Second, It Only Took a Second To Fall In Love With You

In: Baby, Motherhood
Mother with newborn baby on chest, black and white image

You were the second. The second child who, as a mother, I wondered if I could love as much and as fiercely as my first. It’s true, I’m ashamed to admit. As much as you were so desperately prayed for, I was scared. So, so scared. I was scared I was going to fail you. You were the second. And already so loved. But, you see, your brother was my whole entire world. My everything. He made me a mother and gave me all the firsts. My lap was only so big. My heart was only so big. There was...

Keep Reading

Dear Helmet Mama, It’s Not Your Fault

In: Baby, Motherhood
Mom holding baby with helmet, color photo

I’m a helmet mama. It’s something I never thought I’d say, but there it is. And I’m not going to be ashamed of it. Of course, at first, when the doctor referred us to see a specialist for “flat head,” I thought, “Oh, please no. Not my baby.” I’ve seen those babies, and I’ve always felt bad for them and wondered how their heads got that bad. And I’ll be honest, I’d usually pass judgment on the mother of that baby. So how did I end up with my own baby having a helmet on his head? It’s called torticollis—and...

Keep Reading

Thank You to the Nurses Who Cared for My Baby First

In: Baby, Motherhood
Infant in hospital isolette, color photo

I wish I knew who she (or he) was and what she looked like. Was she young or older, experienced or just starting out? How had her weekend been? Was she starting or ending a work shift at 2:30 a.m. that Monday morning when they ran me into the surgery room? The first few days after my son was born, he was kept in intermediate care as we recovered from an emergency C-section that saved both our lives—his by just a few minutes. I occasionally managed to shuffle over to see him, but was pretty weak myself, so the nurses...

Keep Reading

Hey Mama, This Is Your Labor & Delivery Nurse Speaking

In: Baby, Motherhood
Mother holding newborn baby looking up at labor and delivery nurse and smiling

First of all, mama, I want to congratulate you! Whether this is your first baby or not, I am honored to be here with you through this experience. Before you ask me, no, I do not care if you shaved your you know what. There are plenty of other things I’m thinking of, and that is not one of them. I’m so happy to be here for the birth of you and your baby, but most importantly, I’m happy to be here for YOU. It doesn’t matter to me if you want to breastfeed, it doesn’t matter if you want...

Keep Reading