A Gift for Mom! 🤍

I am a mama of two beautiful babies. I was 5 months pregnant with my first child when I was offered a job with the company I ended up working for through both pregnancies. I worked very hard for this company. I was responsible for sales and marketing and met and exceeded their goals prior to taking my maternity leave.

I was 26 years old when I had my son, and I had NO idea what a “normal” amount of maternity leave was. I was told by my employer that I was not covered by FMLA because I had not been with them for 6 months prior to taking maternity leave. I was then told that if I took more than 4 weeks off, they would have to fire me because that was their company policy. They claimed they would hire me back due to my exceptional performance. But they said all of my benefits would start over and I would be considered a new hire in the system so vacation and personal time would start over.

I worked up until Friday afternoon at 5:00 pm before I went in to have my scheduled delivery that Super Bowl Sunday. I had never been a mother before. I had no idea the physical and mental transformation that occurs after giving birth and being responsible for another life. And I agreed to 4 weeks of maternity leave not realizing that it would be extremely detrimental to my health and well-being.

After 27 hours of labor and 3 hours of pushing, it was decided that I had to have a c-section. My body was in a world of hurt. I literally could barely move for 2 weeks after having our son. My husband had to do nearly everything for me and our baby and family members had to come stay at the house and help. But I had agreed to 4 weeks of maternity leave. So I scheduled an appointment with my OB two weeks early (my OB typically does 6 week checkups after delivery) and my doctor (extremely reluctantly) gave me full rights to go back to work. He fought pretty hard to keep me on a weight restriction, but my company refused to let me return with a weight restriction. Luckily, I was in sales, so there was very little, if any heavy lifting.

I left my son at home with a nanny at 4 weeks old. We couldn’t have taken him to a babysitter if we had wanted to because most babysitters in our area will not watch babies until they are at least 6 weeks old. It breaks my heart to think about how little he was and how very much he relied on me for survival. And how very much I needed to be with him to continue my transition into motherhood.

I am not putting down any women who decide to take 4 weeks maternity leave or who are planning to take 4 or less weeks of maternity leave. My hairdresser didn’t even take a full week! I am saying that I believe it should be up to the mother and father of the baby to decide what is best for their situation. I am also not saying that anything the company I worked for at the time did was illegal. It could have been very much legal, I wouldn’t know because I never reached out to a lawyer or asked questions because I didn’t want to lose my job.

In previous posts I have discussed my battle with anxiety and depression during pregnancy. My postpartum anxiety and depression was much worse, and I believe that a very large contributor to my mental health was the fact that I was bullied into taking such a short amount of maternity leave. I encourage everyone, whether you are a soon-to-be mother or father, to know your rights. Talk to your Human Resources Department and if something doesn’t seem right please ask more questions. Require them to present you with documentation and keep documentation and consult a lawyer if you feel like you have to.

Don’t let anyone bully you out of your maternity leave and the precious time that you are not only bonding with your child, but physically and mentally healing from the effects of labor and delivery.

So God Made a Grandmother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Order Now!

Abigail Vetick

Hello! My name is Abigail. I am a Christian saved by grace, a wife to my high school sweetheart, a mama to Brecken and Annabelle and a blogger at Acreage of Grace. I live on the outskirts of a tiny little town in central Nebraska. Buying our 116-year-old acreage was the best decision we ever made because it financially enabled us to live off of one income and for me to become a Stay at Home Mama. Follow our journey at http://acreageofgrace.blogspot.com/Also join me on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest!

Ask For the Playdate

In: Kids
Kids playing at park

When my only child was finishing up his first year of preschool a few years ago, I knew he would miss having friends to play with regularly over the summer. One day at pickup, he invited a friend from his class to come to our house.  His friend seemed interested. Her mom and I agreed it would be nice to have a playdate, but never really made plans as we were getting the kids to the car. I am not an outgoing person, and I always prefer someone else to ask me to do something, rather than being the one...

Keep Reading

My Daughter Said “No” and I Listened

In: Kids
Young girl reading picture book on mother's lap

The other day, my daughter said no. Not quietly. Not hesitantly.Just a simple, confident “no.” And for a moment, I saw it happen. That instinct so many of us were taught to ignore. That pause where girls start to second-guess themselves. But she didn’t shrink. And I realized…I’m not raising her the way I was raised. I was raised to be polite.To be agreeable.To not make things uncomfortable. And while those things sound harmless on the surface, they come with an unspoken lesson. One that a lot of us learned early, without even realizing it. Be easy.Be likable.Be quiet if...

Keep Reading

A Letter To the “Extra” Moms

In: Kids
Mom and young son shooting off firework

This is for the moms who go above and beyond for their children, the “magic makers” and “childhood savers.” While moms are always giving boundless love and doing selfless acts for their kids, “extra” moms make motherhood sparkle. You constantly prioritize your child’s well-being and happiness—it is your number one focus. You are out there creating unforgettable moments that shape your family’s lives. You make birthdays unforgettable, complete with themes, elaborate food, and decorations, and lots of thought and loving time behind each to make every year as special as the last. You make each holiday a wonderland to behold...

Keep Reading

Ellis and the Puffers

In: Kids
Little boy holding dandelion puff flowers

Ellis is a dreamer, loves stories of every kind, library books, Star Wars, and all things magical. He especially loves stories from when his mom was little, and prefers that they be shared in her lap. One of his favorite stories from when his mom was a child is the one about puffers—dandelions that bring wishes, and the special square in the backyard that Grandpa left unmowed every year so Ellis’s mom and her big sister and two big brothers could always have access to their wish makers. Ellis made a point of gathering puffers every day on their walk...

Keep Reading

Strong-Willed Kids Are Not a Problem, They Just Need a Different Approach

In: Kids
Child with wide smile and arms out behind her

Some kids don’t just say “no.” They mean it. They resist direction. They question instructions. They want to do things their own way, even when it would be easier to follow along. These children are often labeled as stubborn. But what if that behavior is not the problem? What if it is the beginning of something important? Strong-willed children are not trying to be difficult. They are trying to make sense of the world in their own way. They want to understand why something matters before they commit to it. When they are told what to do without explanation, they...

Keep Reading

He Waited for Me By the Window and It Felt Like Love

In: Kids
Chair in office

Yesterday I went to urgent care. I had a sore throat, and my doctor had no openings. It was super disappointing because I actually had plans in the morning to see my grandson, and in the evening to go out of town for my sister’s birthday party. It was the rare occasion that everything was already set up. After my insanely long bout of pneumonia and being tethered to my nebulizer for so long, I was looking forward to it with enthusiasm. Of course, par for the course, life had other plans. Instead of being just a 24-hour nuisance, it...

Keep Reading

Feeding Neurodiverse Kids is a College-Level Course

In: Kids
Child eating bagel

Imagine a theoretical college course designed for parents called Proper Family Mealtimes. The class focuses on the core ingredients required to have a truly connected meal: dinner etiquette, polite conversation, menu planning, and hosting. Backed by scientific research, parents will gain knowledge of simple yet practical steps to make mealtime meaningful again. My family would fail this course. When it comes to etiquette, shirts and formal seating are optional. My children pass on polite conversation, swapping in slang like “bruh” whenever possible. Our meal plan rotates between five kid favorites with the option to reject them all, at which point...

Keep Reading

As a Medical Mom, I Measure Growth Differently

In: Kids, Motherhood
Little girl climbing outside

In most homes, the marks on the wall are a simple celebration of time passing. They are pencil lines that track how many inches a child has gained since their last birthday. But in our home, those marks represent a much deeper, more complex story. When your child lives with multiple hormone deficiencies, growth is never just “natural”—it is a carefully managed medical achievement. However, as any medical mom knows, the story doesn’t end at the top of the head. It begins deep inside, with a tiny gland that isn’t sending the right signals. Having multiple hormone deficiencies is often...

Keep Reading

Helping My Son Through Bullying Is Healing Something In Me Too

In: Kids
Family sitting on porch

Bedtime is when my kids tend to open up the most. The lights are low, the day is winding down, and their guard finally comes down with it. One night, my son told me he had been having a really hard time at school. Some boys had been so relentless that he left the cafeteria before finishing his breakfast, deciding it was better to go hungry than face more teasing. Because he’s such a kind boy with a big heart for others, seeing him face that kind of cruelty made my heart ache even more. It wasn’t the first time...

Keep Reading

Robotics Kids Are Building More than You Can See

In: Kids
Robotics kid watching competition

These robotics kids are going to shape our future. I think this every time I watch an elementary, middle school, or high school competition. My thoughts go back many years to when my middle child, who was six at the time, went with my husband to the high school robotics shop. They were only stopping in briefly to pick up some engineering kits, but my child quickly became captivated by what the “big kids” were doing. He stood quietly watching until one student walked over and asked if he would like to see what they were working on. My son,...

Keep Reading