Before becoming a mom, I didn’t like the idea of leaving my children all day to go to work. But I didn’t like the idea of giving up my work and staying home every day as their full-time caregiver either. I wanted to continue doing the work I loved but not have to be away from my kids for most of the week to do it.
So when I got pregnant, I figured the ideal solution would be to work from home.
After the pandemic, more people were doing that anyway. I could take care of my baby myself without having to give up my career. I could do the work I loved and enjoy being home with my baby too! I thought it was the perfect plan.
What I didn’t count on was how little time I’d have to do both things well.
I didn’t count on how short his naps would be those first several months. Or how badly I would want to sleep while he was sleeping.
I didn’t count on how little time I’d have to decompress in the evenings if I spent half of it working.
I didn’t count on the weeks when he’s teething or sick or just extra needy.
I began to wonder when I’d ever find time to work. When would I be able to schedule meetings? And when would I get to SLEEP?
Let’s just say it wasn’t the perfect solution after all, which got me wondering if there even is one perfect answer.
No matter what a mom chooses to do, there will always be wonderful things about it and hard things about it.
There will be times of thriving and times of questioning, good days and bad days, sacrifice and blessing. And as time marches on, we will continue adjusting and re-aligning our choices with the current season of life we’re in.
At the root of this decision, what matters most is that we make our choices for the sake of our children. We care so much about finding the perfect answer because we love our kids. We want to give them the best life possible. We want to provide for them, care for them, and make them feel safe and loved. And we want to give them the gift of a mom who feels happy, healthy, and fulfilled. Who feels like she is living out her purpose and is exactly where she needs to be.
So to all the mommas who work from home—this may not be the easiest or simplest arrangement, but if it’s the one we’re called to right now, then it’s the right arrangement for the moment.
I know there are days where you work all day long yet feel like you got hardly anything done.
I know it’s hard to make yourself sit down to work when you can see the unfolded laundry and scattered toys and leftover mess from lunch.
I know it feels like you’re trying to hold two worlds at once, and you’re wondering if it’s even possible.
I know the guilt you feel—wondering if you gave enough of yourself to both jobs today. Wondering if there’s anything left to give to anyone else.
I also know you love what you do. You love both things. They’re both parts of who you are and what makes you you. You’re doing two things you love, and that’s pretty special.
If this is what you’re called to do right now, then you are right where you need to be, and there is joy and beauty and growth to be found here.
So let’s forget about perfect. Instead, let’s choose to do our best and let that be enough. Let’s choose to see the good. To give ourselves grace. To adjust to life’s demands and find joy in each journey.
I realize that there may never be one consistently perfect arrangement. And I may not feel like I’m doing a perfect job. But I am the perfect momma for my baby. And so are you.