A Gift for Mom! 🤍

Before I had kids I envisioned a perfect family dinner setting:

The 3 course meal would be prepared and ready by 6:00 pm; my husband, my two children, and I would sit down together. We would take turns sharing stories from our day, listening to what each other had to say, smiling and adoring our precious children…

I’m not sure the exact moment when I realized this was NOT going to happen. Maybe it was the accumulation of the following that put it all in perspective

1. Feeding time takes place within minutes of landing at the mothership. On a normal day, by the time I pick my kids up from daycare/school and get them home, it’s nearing 4:00 pm. They are, in their own words, “Starrrrvvvingg!” and cannot wait for me to cook dinner. And I do not mean that they are thoroughly excited for me to cook a nice meal. I mean, they are impatient, hungry, grabby little children who must eat within 1 ½ minutes of telling me that they are hungry. This usually leads to me heating up Spaghettios or making macaroni and cheese to hold them over until the real dinner can be made.

 ​2. I may or may not be able to create something edible for the night. There are days when we come home and my kids are angels. They play nicely with each other, they do not fight, and they don’t destroy the house in the first 10 minutes we are home. Then there are the days when they will not leave my side. My son wants my attention every 2 minutes to show me something, and the toddler wants me to pick her up constantly. I don’t usually see my kids until 3:00 pm, so if they demand my attention, I don’t like to say, “Sorry, kids, Mom has to cook food instead of paying attention to you!” So there are definitely days when I can’t even get into the kitchen to accomplish any type of sustainable food for dinner.

3. Dinner at 6:00? My kids are halfway to zombie mode by then. My kids get up fairly early during the week, at 6:00 am. Despite the fact that their tiny human bodies have 10 times more energy than mine; they are still usually pretty exhausted by 6:00 p.m. And it’s not that enjoyable to sit at a dinner table with kids that can’t even form a sentence without whining because they are so completely exhausted. Or kids who fall into their plate of hot dogs and ketchup and end up looking like they were an extra from a scene in Braveheart.

 4. I don’t like to exercise while I eat. Actually, I don’t like to exercise at all, but that’s not really the point. Dinner time at the table becomes an aerobics routine for my husband and me. As much as I try to make sure everything is ready to go for all four of us, and everything is within an arm’s reach, it usually unfolds like this…Someone doesn’t want their milk, they want water instead. Child #1 wants ice cubes, and now Child#2 wants ice cubes. Child#2 got more ice cubes than Child#1. Child#2 threw her beans and now she’s crying because the beans have dog hair on them. They both want more food, but they need it heated up. Now it’s too hot, it has to go in the fridge. He wants a blue fork, she needs a red spoon. But not the red spoon I grabbed, the OTHER red spoon…Basically for the 17 minutes we try to sit down for dinner, I spend 14 of those minutes getting up and down trying to keep the two tiny humans satisfied.

5. It’s a battle of “I WAS TALKING FIRST!” My son is 5 and my daughter is 3. They have not quite mastered the art of taking turns while telling me the events of their day. This is due to both the sheer excitement of their story telling and the fact that they do not want the other one talking when they are not. And when I say the events of their day, I mean who wiped a booger on somebody at school. It is a constant battle of, “MOM! I WAS TALKING FIRST! LOOK AT ME! YOU’RE NOT LOOKING AT ME! MOMMMMM!!!!” And by the end of the conversation I still am left hanging (no pun intended) on who wiped a booger on whom.

6. I’m not going to lie, I enjoy kicking back on the couch. When it was just my hubby and I, before the tiny humans came along, we often ate dinners on the couch in front of the TV. The living room is where we all socialize and gather, and so we are just used to eating in there at times too. I work all day, and I like sitting on the couch with my feet up eating dinner! I know, I’m a terrible person. I mean, I’m the one that cooks it; I can eat in the bathtub if I want, right? The kids have their little table in the living room too, and they hang out there and we usually all eat together, one big happy family.

I don’t think at this point in my kids’ lives we are missing out on any crucial moments by not sitting at the dining room table. I don’t think it should really matter where you sit for dinner, as long as you are able to make a conscious effort to all sit together and share that time. In fact, I may just move dinners out to the car. I mean, I could actually restrain the kids in their car seats at that point . . . I’ll let you know how it goes.

*This piece was originally published at cassiehilt.com

So God Made a Grandmother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Order Now!

Cassie Hilt

Cassie is a working mother of two small kiddos. She works on maintaining the delicate balance of work/mommy/wife life, and making sure she doesn’t run out of wine before payday. She enjoys writing in her free time and chronicling the adventures of being a mom. You can follow her on Facebook, https://www.facebook.com/thechroniclesofmotherhood Twitter, https://twitter.com/ChronOfMom and Instagram, https://www.instagram.com/the_chronicles_of_motherhood/ and visit her website http://www.cassiehilt.com/

Ask For the Playdate

In: Kids
Kids playing at park

When my only child was finishing up his first year of preschool a few years ago, I knew he would miss having friends to play with regularly over the summer. One day at pickup, he invited a friend from his class to come to our house.  His friend seemed interested. Her mom and I agreed it would be nice to have a playdate, but never really made plans as we were getting the kids to the car. I am not an outgoing person, and I always prefer someone else to ask me to do something, rather than being the one...

Keep Reading

My Daughter Said “No” and I Listened

In: Kids
Young girl reading picture book on mother's lap

The other day, my daughter said no. Not quietly. Not hesitantly.Just a simple, confident “no.” And for a moment, I saw it happen. That instinct so many of us were taught to ignore. That pause where girls start to second-guess themselves. But she didn’t shrink. And I realized…I’m not raising her the way I was raised. I was raised to be polite.To be agreeable.To not make things uncomfortable. And while those things sound harmless on the surface, they come with an unspoken lesson. One that a lot of us learned early, without even realizing it. Be easy.Be likable.Be quiet if...

Keep Reading

A Letter To the “Extra” Moms

In: Kids
Mom and young son shooting off firework

This is for the moms who go above and beyond for their children, the “magic makers” and “childhood savers.” While moms are always giving boundless love and doing selfless acts for their kids, “extra” moms make motherhood sparkle. You constantly prioritize your child’s well-being and happiness—it is your number one focus. You are out there creating unforgettable moments that shape your family’s lives. You make birthdays unforgettable, complete with themes, elaborate food, and decorations, and lots of thought and loving time behind each to make every year as special as the last. You make each holiday a wonderland to behold...

Keep Reading

Ellis and the Puffers

In: Kids
Little boy holding dandelion puff flowers

Ellis is a dreamer, loves stories of every kind, library books, Star Wars, and all things magical. He especially loves stories from when his mom was little, and prefers that they be shared in her lap. One of his favorite stories from when his mom was a child is the one about puffers—dandelions that bring wishes, and the special square in the backyard that Grandpa left unmowed every year so Ellis’s mom and her big sister and two big brothers could always have access to their wish makers. Ellis made a point of gathering puffers every day on their walk...

Keep Reading

Strong-Willed Kids Are Not a Problem, They Just Need a Different Approach

In: Kids
Child with wide smile and arms out behind her

Some kids don’t just say “no.” They mean it. They resist direction. They question instructions. They want to do things their own way, even when it would be easier to follow along. These children are often labeled as stubborn. But what if that behavior is not the problem? What if it is the beginning of something important? Strong-willed children are not trying to be difficult. They are trying to make sense of the world in their own way. They want to understand why something matters before they commit to it. When they are told what to do without explanation, they...

Keep Reading

He Waited for Me By the Window and It Felt Like Love

In: Kids
Chair in office

Yesterday I went to urgent care. I had a sore throat, and my doctor had no openings. It was super disappointing because I actually had plans in the morning to see my grandson, and in the evening to go out of town for my sister’s birthday party. It was the rare occasion that everything was already set up. After my insanely long bout of pneumonia and being tethered to my nebulizer for so long, I was looking forward to it with enthusiasm. Of course, par for the course, life had other plans. Instead of being just a 24-hour nuisance, it...

Keep Reading

Feeding Neurodiverse Kids is a College-Level Course

In: Kids
Child eating bagel

Imagine a theoretical college course designed for parents called Proper Family Mealtimes. The class focuses on the core ingredients required to have a truly connected meal: dinner etiquette, polite conversation, menu planning, and hosting. Backed by scientific research, parents will gain knowledge of simple yet practical steps to make mealtime meaningful again. My family would fail this course. When it comes to etiquette, shirts and formal seating are optional. My children pass on polite conversation, swapping in slang like “bruh” whenever possible. Our meal plan rotates between five kid favorites with the option to reject them all, at which point...

Keep Reading

As a Medical Mom, I Measure Growth Differently

In: Kids, Motherhood
Little girl climbing outside

In most homes, the marks on the wall are a simple celebration of time passing. They are pencil lines that track how many inches a child has gained since their last birthday. But in our home, those marks represent a much deeper, more complex story. When your child lives with multiple hormone deficiencies, growth is never just “natural”—it is a carefully managed medical achievement. However, as any medical mom knows, the story doesn’t end at the top of the head. It begins deep inside, with a tiny gland that isn’t sending the right signals. Having multiple hormone deficiencies is often...

Keep Reading

Helping My Son Through Bullying Is Healing Something In Me Too

In: Kids
Family sitting on porch

Bedtime is when my kids tend to open up the most. The lights are low, the day is winding down, and their guard finally comes down with it. One night, my son told me he had been having a really hard time at school. Some boys had been so relentless that he left the cafeteria before finishing his breakfast, deciding it was better to go hungry than face more teasing. Because he’s such a kind boy with a big heart for others, seeing him face that kind of cruelty made my heart ache even more. It wasn’t the first time...

Keep Reading

Robotics Kids Are Building More than You Can See

In: Kids
Robotics kid watching competition

These robotics kids are going to shape our future. I think this every time I watch an elementary, middle school, or high school competition. My thoughts go back many years to when my middle child, who was six at the time, went with my husband to the high school robotics shop. They were only stopping in briefly to pick up some engineering kits, but my child quickly became captivated by what the “big kids” were doing. He stood quietly watching until one student walked over and asked if he would like to see what they were working on. My son,...

Keep Reading