There’s a half-eaten, yellow Dum-Dum sucker stuck in the console of my dashboard, right in front of my gear shift. Every day when I pick my daughter up from daycare, she gets a Dum-Dum sucker from the director as we leave. Once in the car, she usually eats some of it and either puts it upside down in the cup holder of her car seat, or she hands it to me, and I place it in the console until we get home when I can toss it in the trash.
This is nothing new. This has been part of our routine for about a year now. I honestly intended on throwing the yellow sucker away, but I forgot. Then the next day came and went, and I forgot. By the end of the week, I couldn’t bring myself to toss it. This sounds gross, I know, but I had begun to actually like seeing that yellow sucker there. In fact, it took me over a month before I finally decided it was gross enough, and I needed to toss it.
Every day on my way to work, I would see that half-eaten yellow sucker and smile. Then within a matter of seconds, I was thinking about my daughter and how much joy she radiates. How amazing this adventure is and how much she has changed me.
I used to be a complete clean freak. My car was spotless before having my daughter. Nothing free-flowing was in my car. Everything had its place, and it was always vacuumed and cleaned. That all went out the window once my daughter reached the toddler years.
Now there is probably a mountain of half-eaten snacks under her car seat, popcorn in the back seat, a blanket on the floorboard, and probably another one or two half-eaten suckers stashed away somewhere back there to be honest. And I love it.
The mess is so beautiful. I wouldn’t have it any other way. When I look at that sucker, I remember all the years I spent praying for this little girl. I remember how much I pleaded with God for the life I have now. I prayed for this. I prayed for that yellow, half-eaten sucker on my dash.
It not only serves as a warm reminder of my sweet girl, but it also serves as a cruel reminder that time is a thief. My daughter is going to grow up so fast right before my eyes. My car will be spotless again. It will no longer have snacks scattered across the back seat, and there won’t be a half-eaten yellow sucker on my dashboard.
For now, I am embracing the mess. Time is a thief, but time is also a gift. Every time I see that yellow sucker, I am reminded to enjoy these days. To welcome the mess and to remind myself that this is an answered prayer. Until the sucker disappears permanently, I will be thanking my God for these moments and embracing his incredible gift to me.
Originally published on the author’s blog
by Jaymi Torrez 
by Lizzy Christian 
by Anneliese Lawton 
