Like so many kids are, I was raised by a single mom—the kind of woman who always put her kids first and did her absolute best to provide everything she possibly could for us. She worked 12-hour days to keep a roof over our heads and spent her last pennies ensuring our birthdays and Christmas were times to remember. Sometimes she chose not to eat so she knew we would have enough food for several days in a row. She was a superwoman! But she was lonely, and as I grew up, I noticed it more and more.
Then one day in June of 2010, my mom said my sister and I were going to meet her boyfriend.
I was already 18 and had just graduated from high school. What did I need a “pretend dad” for now? I was grown. I didn’t need someone new to come into my life and try to dictate what I was doing or who I was going to be. I was reluctant, but I obliged.
The following day, Randy came to our apartment. I naturally had a huge wall up because I was perfectly capable of living life without a dad. Who was this dude? Did he have kids already? How long have they been together? If he thinks for one second he’s about to come into this house and boss everyone around, he has another thing coming.
But he wasn’t like that. Randy seemed a bit rough around the edges, but he had kind eyes. He looked at my mother like he already loved her. He shook my hand like I mattered, not like he was coming into my life to make it harder, like other people had done before. He seemed different. But was he? We would see about that because I had become an expert at this point in sniffing out people who didn’t have my best interest at heart.
A few months later, we moved to Maryland after living in Pennsylvania my entire life. We were moving in with him, but that was okay. I actually liked him! He didn’t try to make me feel like a child, or his child, which was important because I wasn’t his child. But man, he was growing on me.
We moved into an apartment with him and his two children, and we all got along well. Wow, I thought, I can’t believe this is actually working out! Mom is so happy, and I’m starting to really care about this guy. My little sister likes him, and he’s been a breath of fresh air for us. I’m happy.
I had waited my entire childhood for a dad, but I got one in adulthood.
It’s been 15 years since I was first introduced to Randy. He and my mom have been married for 13 years, and he is the dad I didn’t know I wanted but needed. In adulthood, Randy has been there every step of the way. He showed up to replace my car battery when it died, helped me moved countless times, helped me stand back up on my two feet when my life was out of control, shared so many laughs and several tears. He was there the day I announced I was pregnant with my son, and was the man who walked me down the aisle three years ago when I married my husband. There has never been a moment since we met that I felt like my mom made the wrong choice in being with him.
I never thought I’d have a dad, but now I do, and wow, is he an amazing one.
by Janelle Sims 
by Jennifer Bailey 
by Stephanie Freybler 
