Sometimes the real winners are sitting on the bench

You see the young athlete standing on the sidelines, waiting for their chance to step on the field. You know how hard they’ve worked to get here—and to see them not get much of an opportunity is a sucker punch to morale.

It makes for a tough season, and not because of wins and losses. Sometimes, at a bigger school or on a higher-level team where many are competing for spots, just making the team might be enough. But for athletes coming back from injury or feeling burned out by the weight of expectations and criticism, it’s easy to wonder: Was it all worth it? All that work, all that sacrifice—just to sit on the bench and watch it slip away?

From the sidelines watching rather than playing, it would be easy to be frustrated, unsupportive, and stop showing up. But they don’t. Some adults can’t show up in life with the amount of grace a kid sitting on the bench demonstrates.

Watching the benchwarmers waiting for their moment to shine, I saw when other players on the team got mad at the one playing in her position, or when the person who was her top competition got more minutes. Yet it was she, the one on the bench patiently waiting for a turn that may never come, who was the first to have her teammate’s back.

Sometimes, youth sports culture makes it seem okay for kids to tear down teammates when they struggle or make mistakes. Playing time and winning seem to be what it’s all about—but my daughter cheering on the sidelines tells a different story.

I can be upset she might never see the field. But after a tough loss, watching her support the girl who played her position—and being angry with those who’d rather tear her down—nothing makes me prouder of her and her character.

I don’t care if your kid is the best player on the team; I’ve seen superstar athletes leave high school and fail in the real world because they lacked character. I’ve watched my fair share of youth sports over the past decade, and have always had a soft spot for the underdog, the kid who gets overlooked. The underdogs are often the toughest ones in the pack.

There’s toughness and grittiness in the kids who sit on the bench that will serve them well. I see the way they show up. I see the way they support their team. We all see them, and we should all be proud of them.

Because that’s the kind of character that will help them win at life.

So God Made a Grandmother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Order Now!

Angela Williams Glenn

Angela Williams Glenn writes about the struggles and joys of motherhood. Her book Moms, Monsters, Media, and Margaritas examines the expectations verse the realities of motherhood in our modern day digital era and her book Letters to a Daughter is an interactive journal for mothers to their daughters. She’s also been published with Chicken Soup for the Soul, TAAVI Village, Bored Teachers, and Filter Free Parents. You can find her humorous and uplifting stories on Facebook page.