Ornaments, Candles, Tees and More! Order Soon for Christmas Delivery!🎄 ➔

Beyonce’s daughter wore a designer dress that cost thousands of dollars to an award show. Well, alright, I get that many people feel it’s extravagant. I mean, she’s like, four-years-old, right? She probably doesn’t need, and maybe she doesn’t even want, an expensive dress.

When I first saw the pictures and read about the cost of the dress, I will admit that I, too, thought it was a bit much. However, it’s really none of my business how much anyone, Beyonce or the neighbor down the street, spends on his or her daughter’s clothing. Plus, I’ve got more important things to think about such as presidential elections, back-to-school backpack organization, how the heck I’m going to get more sleep, find a “real” job, get my first book published, and how to minimize the lines on my forehead.

Seriously, people, sh*t just got real.

What I find to be most disturbing is the number of tweets, Facebook posts, and online comments all over the Internet that proclaim how “ugly” Beyonce’s daughter is. What in the heck is wrong with people? Most of the online comments were written by grown-a$$ adults who clearly have nothing better to do but to sit around all day long reading entertainment magazines and post crap about someone’s child.

Yes, I said, “Child.”

Blue Ivy is someone’s little kid. She probably plays with dolls, likes to paint, eats chicken nuggets (albeit more than likely made by an authentic organic-certified, highly trained person chef), but still, she is somebody’s baby regardless of who might be cooking her meals, and despite the fact that her parents can afford to buy her expensive dresses.

This child, who isn’t even old enough to attend school yet, is being called “ugly” by adults.

Sickening.

First of all, who are these people who have all the time in the world to sit around and comment about how ugly someone’s kid is, and why can’t they all find something better to do? I’m going to just throw it out there and guess that none of these douchebags are the sharpest tools in the shed. They probably don’t volunteer a lot of their free time helping the homeless or underprivileged. I bet they don’t teach adults to read in their spare time. They seem to me to be jealous, self-absorbed, petulant, immature and cowardly folks who, sitting behind a computer screen, use their words to cause pain, hurt feelings and make themselves feel better by tearing down other people’s kids.

Maybe these people don’t talk badly about their friends’ children. Maybe they don’t even say mean or hurtful things about the children at their kids’ schools or in their own neighborhoods, but only reserve the awful insults for the rich and famous. After all, most of those darn celebrities deserve to hear that hundreds of the “common people” think their kids are hideous, don’t they?

See, I don’t think they do. I don’t think that even if you are Beyonce, the President of the United States, or anyone else in the world, that you deserve or need to hear that there are adults out there who think your kid is ugly. I certainly don’t believe that those celebrities’ kids need to read online one day that numerous people thought that they were ugly children. Who is that going to help, and why do we, as a civilized society, think it’s okay to badmouth someone else’s kid?

It’s one thing to criticize an adult celebrity. I don’t agree with body shaming an adult or even calling an adult celebrity “ugly”, but an adult can fight back. An adult celebrity chooses, in most cases, not all, to post pictures of herself, so she probably knows there will be some negative comments. But when people start picking on children, that’s when my blood boils.

So, here’s my advice for those of you who think it’s perfectly okay to bash someone’s kid…

  1. Get a job.
  2. Go to school.
  3. Look in the mirror.
  4. Spend some time with a child, like, some REAL time. Afterwards ask yourself, “Is it truly okay for me to talk about this child’s looks?”
  5. Go for a walk.
  6. Have some ice cream.
  7. Adopt a shelter animal.
  8. Don’t be a dick.
  9. Don’t be a bitch.
  10. Figure out why you decided to post about how ugly you think a child is, and fix what’s wrong with YOU.

Kids are kids no matter who their parents are. They have feelings, just like the rest of us, and just like your own children do. How would you feel if someone told you that your son or daughter was ugly? What would you do? What would you say?

Stop tearing down children. It’s rude, it’s distasteful, it hurts, and it’s bullying.

If you are an adult, and you post something hurtful online about someone else’s child, you are a bully and you need to grow up. Clearly you have forgotten what it feels like to be called names, and you have lost what it means to be a compassionate human being.

Do better, get you sh*t together, and get a life. You’ll be happier, trust me.

 

If you liked this, you'll love our new book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available for pre-order now!

Pre-Order Now

Tammi Landry-Gilder

Tammi is an author, wife, mother and blogger who lives in West Bloomfield, Michigan, with her husband, two sons, three dogs, and too many fish in a tank to count.

Don’t Fear the Gap

In: Baby, Kids, Motherhood
Baby lying on mother's chest, black-and-white photo

I was afraid of the gap. You know, the one where you have some kids and then wait several years to have another? That gap. When we moved here, we kept all the baby things because we weren’t ready to say we were done but weren’t ready to start over. Moving to the farm brought wayyy more chores than our neighborhood home and adding a tiny human to that mix felt a bit crazy. RELATED: I’ll Always Want Another Baby There were months of back and forth . . . talk of barefoot baby feet stomping all over this place...

Keep Reading

The Magic of Having Kids Who Still Believe in Santa Is Worth the Christmas Chaos

In: Motherhood
Kids looking at Elf on the Shelf toy

Our elves showed up sometime in the night between Thanksgiving and Black Friday, just as they have every year for the last seven.  All three of our kids had been excited for their arrival, but we noticed our oldest was especially eager this year.  “Our elves come this month!” he announced on November 1, eyes twinkling with anticipation. He counted down nearly every night after, and once they finally showed up we found him in the corner talking to them several times throughout the day.  “How was the trip from the North Pole?” “Man, I’ve sure missed you guys.” “What...

Keep Reading

It’s Exhausting Being a Teacher and a Mom in the Month of December

In: Living, Motherhood
Mom and two kids smiling by Christmas tree

I absolutely love Christmas. In fact, I start listening to Christmas music right after Halloween. I’m always itching to put decorations up as soon as my other family members are willing. I love the magic of the season, the giving and the meaning behind all of it. By the time November begins, I’m ready to take on the holidays in full force as both a teacher and a mom. If I’m being honest though, Christmas as a teacher mama is both magical and downright exhausting. There are parties for both my own children and my students. There are gifts to...

Keep Reading

Being a Working Mom When Kids Get Sick Is Complicated

In: Living, Motherhood
Mom holding baby on couch

I didn’t know what my ringtone sounded like until I went back to work after maternity leave. “You know it’s always on silent,” I would say every time I missed a call from my husband. “What’s the point of having a phone if you never answer your calls?” “Who calls these days? Text me like a normal person!” It was a circular conversation, lighthearted, and not intended to bring about change. He will always prefer to call, and I will always prefer to keep my ringer off. But when I got my first early pickup text from my daycare provider...

Keep Reading

Dear Daughter, If Something Feels Off, It Probably Is—Trust Your Intuition

In: Kids, Living, Motherhood
Mother and daughter black and white photo

A few weeks ago, my 7-year-old daughter was playing at a friend’s house when she messaged me on her game tablet to come pick her up. I didn’t ask why I just went to get her. I asked her once she was home how it was, and she told me she had a weird feeling and she was just “trusting her guts,” which I loved hearing her say. Apparently, her friend had a bunch of extended family show up at the house that we were unaware of. She is extremely outgoing, friendly, and confident so she thought nothing of listening...

Keep Reading

What Single Moms Really Need

In: Faith, Living, Motherhood
Mom holding toddler on hip outside on dirt road

No, you’re not a single mom for a weekend. I’ve heard it said at social gatherings, in passing at church, and on social media. Perhaps the words are being uttered in a state of awe as if comparing themselves to valiant warrior princesses, knights in shining armor, heroes.  Usually though, it’s an under-the-breath complaint about being left by their otherwise attentive and loving spouse for the week or weekend. “I’m a single mom this weekend; my husband is on a golfing trip with his brothers.” “My husband is away for work, so I feel like a single mom this week.” ...

Keep Reading

I Love You At Every Stage

In: Kids, Motherhood
Three children at park, color photo

Confession: I love the 1-year-old phase. Our youngest is one and such a joy to be around. He’s still so cuddly, finds such joy in the smallest things, is learning new things every day, and smiles at every little thing his big brother and sister do. I love the 3-year-old phase. Our only girl is three. She has a flair for the dramatic, but she is very forthright with her feelings. “I’m having a hard time.” “I just miss my daddy when he’s at the Fire House.” “I’m a princess.” “God made me beautiful.” She is quick to be a...

Keep Reading

10 Lessons I Hope You Learn Playing Youth Sports

In: Kids, Motherhood
Boy dribbling down basketball court, black-and-white photo

Last night was my sixth grader’s last basketball game of the season. He played with many of the same gang of boyhood friends he has known since kindergarten. This year, however, they were introduced to a traveling team, older players, and much stiffer competition than they had encountered in the past. They stood the test and played their little boy hearts out. I am proud of my son, his team, his coaches, and all the familiar faces we came to know in the Greenwood Laboratory School cheering section each week, sometimes two to three times in one week!  Here’s to...

Keep Reading

Having a Late Preterm Baby Is Hard Too

In: Baby, Motherhood
Mother holding infant, color photo

I see you, mama, who holds her breath while they bag your brand-new baby. Asking “is she okay?” and being met with “everything is fine” when you know that everything is not fine. The baby who was due in just a few weeks. The baby, who just a few hours earlier, you joked “wanted to surprise us early.” The baby who was fine on the monitors just minutes before. I see you, mama, when they tell you they are transporting your baby to the NICU. The baby you held for five minutes before they took her to the nursery for...

Keep Reading

You Gave Him So Much More than a Haircut

In: Child, Motherhood
Baby boy with long hair, color photo

“Thank you for cutting his hair,” I’ve told Emily many times in passing, or lightheartedly over text. I wish I could show her what it actually means in my heart. “I’ll go in by myself,” he says. Instantly, my mind flashes from the achingly handsome 10-year-old standing in front of me to the toddler he once was. I see his 2-year-old self standing before me in our mudroom. Fresh from Kids Cuts, a soggy sticker on his T-shirt that reads “I GOT MY HAIRCUT.” A red and blotchy face from crying, eyes swollen. The buzz cut was the quickest way...

Keep Reading