Dear Daddy,

You are the most important man in my life. And even though I will probably never directly tell you I need any of these things said to me, I desperately need to hear them from you . . . 

“You are beautiful.”
Daddy, when you look at me, I need to know you think I’m beautiful . . . really beautiful . . . no-matter-what-I-look-like beautiful. Even if my hair is blue; even if I don’t have the perfect “magazine” figure, I long for you to see me as beautiful . . . just as I am. Tell me you think I’m beautiful, and I will see myself as beautiful.

“You are loved.”
Daddy, when I look into your eyes, I need to see love looking back at me—genuine, never-ending, unconditional, beautiful love. Even when you’re disappointed, I need to know your love never disappears. Never ever. Tell me you love me, and I will love myself.

“You are accepted.”
Daddy, when I mess up, I need to know our relationship won’t get messed up. Even when I make mistakes, I need to know I am not only loved but also accepted just as I am. Tell me you accept me as your daughter no matter what, and I will accept myself no matter what.

 “You are significant.”
Daddy, when you are busy, I need to know that I still matter to you . . . that I am important to you. Please pay attention to me. If I don’t get your attention, I will seek attention from someone else somewhere else. Tell me I am significant to you, and I will see myself as significant in this world.

“You are valuable.”
Daddy, when you give to me, give me your time. When you clear your schedule just to make time for me, I notice. When you intentionally seek me out just to talk to me, I feel special. When you purposely stay a little longer to snuggle at bedtime, I feel lost in your warmth. Your time is worth more to me and speaks my worth to me more than anything else. Tell me I am valuable to you, and I will see myself as valuable.

“You are capable.”
Daddy, when you think of me, I need to know you believe I can do it—whatever “it” may be. When you believe in me, I will be more courageous, more confident, more willing to take steps forward. Tell me you think I’m capable, and I will see myself as capable . . . able to conquer anything!

“You are strong.”
Daddy, when I attempt something new, I need to know you will let me try to fail on my own and not just swoop in and make it all better. When you focus on my strengths and abilities, you will allow me to solve my own problems and fix my own mistakes. And that speaks volumes . . . that tells me I can accomplish big things. Tell me you see me as strong, and I will see myself as even stronger!

“You are safe.”
Daddy, when I do fail, I need to know you will be there to comfort me. I need to hear your reassuring words whispered in my ear that tomorrow is a new day and that you believe I have what it takes to get back up and try again. I need to be able to share all my insecurities, doubts, and fears with you. Tell me my heart is safe with you, and I will trust you with my whole heart . . . even when it’s broken.

“You are mine.”
Daddy, when I feel lost, I need to know I belong to you—that I will always be your precious daughter. When I am sad or afraid; when I feel confused; when my life takes an uncertain turn; or even when everything else seems so unpredictable, I need to know I can run into your loving arms, and you will hold me so closely . . . no questions asked. Tell me I belong to you, and I will feel a sense of belonging that will impact my life forever.

I love you, Daddy. And I want you love me too. No matter where I go, no matter what I do or say, no matter how old I get, the truth is . . . deep down, I just want to be your little girl—loved and accepted by you and safe in your arms. 

Your daughter

Dear Daughter,

Whether you have an earthly father to say these things to you or not, I want you to know I will always be here for you and say these things to you every single day . . . 

      You are beautiful.

      You are loved.

      You are accepted.

      You are significant.

      You are valuable.

      You are capable.

      You are strong.

      You are safe.

      You are mine.

And you will always be my little girl.


Christine Leeb

Christine Leeb--Speaker and Christian Family Coach specializing in Parenting and Child Discipline.  Founder of Real Life Families--a non-profit organization building better families through free classes and resources.  Mother to three awesome (and exhausting) children from whom she shamefully hides brownies.  Wife to one patient (and polar-opposite) husband with whom she constantly quotes "Friends".