I’ve always had a rather unique style.
I’m not afraid to dress loudly and stand out.
I’ll be the only girl wearing heels in a stadium full of flats.
I’ll wear sequins and glitter in my 30s.
I’ll wear vintage, current trends, and things that have possibly never been fashionable.
If I feel confident and comfortable in what I’m wearing, that’s really all I care about.
I’ve been complimented on my outfit choices plenty of times.
I’ve also been negatively judged—many times I know about and probably more times when I’m blissfully unaware.
One specific instance will always stand out, not because this person or their opinions hold any significance to me whatsoever. In fact, if I had to choose one person on this earth to care the least about in the entire human race, it would easily be this person.
I forget they even exist, but I will always remember this statement . . .
“If she’s going to be a mom, she needs to learn to dress like one.”
I was wearing a tank top stylishly tied to the side, jean shorts, and flip-flops. In the middle of summer. At a gathering in a park.
An outfit perfectly appropriate for the weather, occasion, and setting.
Honestly, I don’t think it matters what I was wearing that day . . . this person would’ve scraped for reasons to insult me anyway.
But as irrelevant as it is, I’ll always be thankful this particular insult made its way to my ears.
The absurdness of the statement is really what got me. It was said specifically to be hateful toward my character and ability to be a mother—something this person knows absolutely nothing about.
Not to mention this person has no children of their own and has no idea what it’s actually like to be a mom yet felt the need to correlate my parental value with my wardrobe.
Go ahead and insult my flamboyant shoes all you want, but don’t downgrade me on such a meaningful, personal level when you don’t even know me.
I’m the same mother whether I’m wearing stilettos or if I’m wearing the same spit-up stained T-shirt I wore yesterday.
Since when does being a mother mean you have to dress a certain way or you’re an inadequate parent?
I’m not “going to be a mom,” I am a mom. An amazing mom at that.
And my mothering abilities have nothing to do with my outside appearance or attire whatsoever.
I’ll never tone down my fashion sense to conform or try to blend in with others.
And I pray my sons and daughter follow my example and aren’t afraid to wear red when everyone else is wearing white.
Clothing never determines personality. That’s a hill I’ll die on . . .
While I’m wearing whatever I want.