The Sweetest Mother's Day Gift!

My son starts pre-kindergarten this year. Then everything changes. “It’s a good thing,” I tell myself. “Yay, we get to shop for school supplies.” “Yay, no more sleeping late.”

I really am excited for him. The school we selected employs wonderful teachers. The curriculum strikes a great balance between play and academics. I know my son will make new friends, explore his interests and grow. He will learn to navigate good and bad days on his own.

So why am I terrified? I’ve asked myself this question every day since I signed the registration papers. If I know it’s the best thing, why does it make me want to hide under the covers on the first day?

After some soul searching, here is what I came up with– five major reasons why sending a child to school in 2017 is as terrifying an experience as it is joyful.

1. Stranger Danger

From the moment they understand us, we teach our children “Don’t talk to strangers. Don’t go with strangers.” Then school comes along and we send them alone into a room full of STRANGERS. Yes, the majority of them will be four-year-olds, but still, I don’t know these children. I don’t know their parents. I don’t know what they get into outside of school. Maybe Johnny’s parents don’t police the television like I do. I mean, how much does Johnny know? Do Johnny’s parents smoke? Maybe. What do they smoke? I don’t know. Terrifying.

2. Bullying

Sometimes people are mean. This includes kids. If I’m being honest, sometimes my son is mean. When he doesn’t get his way, he can throw a fit, an angry unattractive fit. But bullying is mean on another level. Bullying is name-calling, put downs and just nastiness. I think my son is pretty cool. He is smart. He knows the names of planets and pretty much every dinosaur. I love this about him! It kills me to think he might get made fun of or excluded. He has a wonky extra front tooth. What if some obnoxious kid makes fun of his tooth? What if my son is the bully? Terrifying.

3. School Violence

Children get shot at schools. By OTHER CHILDREN. By ADULTS. This happens way too often for me not to think about it. When it comes to random acts of violence, I have no control. I can’t anticipate insanity and keep him home that day. Even scarier, if something does happen I can’t get to him. A school on lock-down is literally my worst nightmare. Terrifying.

4. Academic Pressure

I learned my letters in kindergarten. In 2017, kids start learning to read in voluntary pre-kindergarten. Why? Really, why? My husband and I went to the parent meeting, and bam, they mentioned homework. I hated homework as a kid. Now I have to hate my pre-school kid’s homework? Boooooo. Don’t set my son up for failure. Don’t pressure him into thinking he isn’t meeting some imaginary standard. Ok, thanks. Terrifying.

5. No more Freedom

I admit, I like the part of being a work-from-home mom where we can pretty much do and go as we please. Once school starts, we are at the mercy of someone else’s schedule. No more wake up and ask, “What do you want to do today?” He has to go to school. This year, it’s just three hours a day, but come kindergarten, he will spend more time at school than at home during the week. Terrifying.

My son can annoy the crab apples out of me, but I will miss him. I mean, he was just a baby. I just brought him home from the hospital. It is my job to nurture and protect him. Now he is going off on his own, buying a backpack and red folders, getting ready to conquer a world where I won’t be there to guide him.

Every night, I pray that he has a good first day. I pray he does well. I pray he doesn’t feel quite so terrified as I do.

So God Made a Grandmother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Order Now!

Sarah Whitman

Sarah Whitman is a writer and mother living in Tampa, Fl. As the religion columnist for the Tampa Bay Times, she covers a broad range of faith and spiritual-related topics. She also contributes parenting columns. She recently started a poetry page on Facebook and welcomes mothers to submit their writings to the site. Visit Mama Dickinson at www.facebook.com/mamadickinson. Visit 1mamadickinson on Instagram.

Robotics Kids Are Building More than You Can See

In: Kids
Robotics kid watching competition

These robotics kids are going to shape our future. I think this every time I watch an elementary, middle school, or high school competition. My thoughts go back many years to when my middle child, who was six at the time, went with my husband to the high school robotics shop. They were only stopping in briefly to pick up some engineering kits, but my child quickly became captivated by what the “big kids” were doing. He stood quietly watching until one student walked over and asked if he would like to see what they were working on. My son,...

Keep Reading

Foster Care Kids Are Worth Fighting for

In: Kids
Hand holding young child's hand

Sometimes foster care looks like bringing a child from a hard place into your home. Sometimes it looks like sitting at a ball field with a former foster love’s mom and being her village. He’s the one who has brought me to my knees more times than my own children. He’s the one I lie awake at night thinking about. He’s the one I beg the father to protect. He’s the one who makes me want to get in the trenches over and over again. It’s our Bubba. So much of the story is not mine to tell, but the...

Keep Reading

We Aren’t Holding Her Back—We’re Giving Her More Time

In: Kids
Child writing on preschool paper

When we decided to give our preschooler another year before kindergarten, I thought the hardest part would be explaining it to other people. I was wrong. The hardest part was the afternoon her teacher asked to talk. In that split second in the pick-up line, my heart sank. I assumed the worst. I braced myself for a conversation about behavior, about something we had somehow missed, about whether her strong personality was causing problems. Instead, it became the moment that confirmed what we already knew. We were not holding her back. We were giving her time. Our daughter is bright....

Keep Reading

A Life Lived Differently Is Not a Life Less Lived

In: Kids
Little boy running in field

My life changed on that beautiful autumn day. The thing is, nothing really happened. Not really. My life kind of went on as usual. A fly on the wall might even say it was a great day. I brought my 3-year-old son to an animal farm for a Halloween event. He was quirky as usual and a bit ornery that day. Aloof. “Come feed the baby animals,” I pleaded. No, thank you. Crowds of excited children? Absolutely not. Buckets of candy? You can keep them. My heart ached watching my beautiful, blonde-haired boy wander into a field alone, away from...

Keep Reading

Enjoy the Ride, Kid

In: Kids
Two people running up from the water at the beach

Last night I watched an episode of Shrinking. If you haven’t jumped into the series yet, it’s one of those that hits the heart hard- at least for me. The episode centered on the birth of a baby, while one of the characters grappled with the closing years of life. Spoiler alert: as the elder of the group cradled this new life in his arms, bridging generations across the hospital room, the moment of realization of how fast life goes hit like a ton of bricks. “Enjoy the ride, kid.” The final words of this episode are sitting with me,...

Keep Reading

Mommy, Will You Play With Me?

In: Kids, Motherhood
Boy sitting in middle of toys smiling

With four kids at three different schools, our days are full. Between sports practices, music lessons, clubs, rehearsals, games, meets, and playdates, it feels like we’re constantly heading somewhere. I love that my children are involved in activities, but occasionally, it’s nice to have some downtime. When I get a text or email that a practice has been canceled, it’s usually a huge relief. Last week, after-school sports were cancelled due to heavy rain. When I picked up my youngest son from school, I told him we’d be going straight home for the rest of the afternoon. He looked surprised....

Keep Reading

Could We Take a Page from the ’80s and Stop Overparenting?

In: Kids, Motherhood

I have a confession: Yesterday I let my 11-year-old play with fire. Like literally. We live in the country, there is still wet snow on the ground, and he’s done it with his dad at least 20 times. But yesterday was the fifth consecutive day of no school, and probably the twentieth consecutive day of him asking to have a small fire without dad. Part of me did it out of laziness. Part of me did it out of selfishness. And part of me did it out of nostalgia. Here’s the thing—when I was 11, I was already babysitting (like...

Keep Reading

A Big Brother Is His Little Sister’s First Friend

In: Kids
Big brother and little sister smiling at each other

He doesn’t remember the day she came home.But she has never known a world without him. From the beginning, he was there first. The first to reach for her hand. The first to explain the rules. The first to decide what was fair and what absolutely was not. He didn’t know he was being assigned a role. He just stepped into it. Big brother. She followed him everywhere. Into rooms she technically wasn’t invited into. Into games she didn’t fully understand. Into stories she insisted on hearing again and again. She wanted to do what he did, say what he...

Keep Reading

7 Is the Bridge Between Little and Big Kid

In: Kids
Girl sitting in front of dollhouse

I was in the middle of the post-holiday clean-up chaos when something hit me. My oldest daughter is seven, and while it feels like an age that doesn’t get talked about much, it really is turning out to be such a sweet spot. It hit me as we were redesigning her room. A change that occurred when she broke my mama-heart a few weeks prior by saying she didn’t think she wanted a princess room anymore. While everything in me wanted to try to convince her to keep it, stay small and sweet just a little longer, I knew I...

Keep Reading

So God Made a Gymnast

In: Kids
Young gymnast on balance beam

God made a gymnast with fearless grace, strength in her heart, and a fire in her spirit. He molded her courage, steady and true, and quietly whispered, “We believe in you.” He taught her balance when life feels chaotic and messy, to leap into her faith and stick each landing just right. When she stumbles, He is always right there to help her rise back up with faith in her soul and a spark in her eyes. Each floor routine with the grace of a swan; each move is a dream, all built on dedication and grit. God made her...

Keep Reading