So God Made a Mother Collection ➔

This one is for my girls. The ones who love me through my ugly. The ones who show up at my doorstep ready to fight a bear on my behalf. The ones I can be myself around.

This one is for you.

My ride-or-die girls, you are the ones who keep me grounded. When everything around me feels like it is crashing in, you throw me a lifeline. I can be honest with you about the hard stuff, like fights with my husband and financial struggles. You don’t judge, you don’t try to fix, you just show up at my door with my favorite coffee and an open ear.

You girls saved me.

Motherhood did a lot of strange things to me and loneliness was pretty high on the list.

After baby number one my friend list slowly dwindled down. I didn’t know how to cultivate adult relationships, and all of my energy went to keeping tiny people alive. With each passing month, I felt my mental health slipping, but instead of getting help I just pushed through and hoped it would all go away.

RELATED: When Mama is Lonely

I didn’t know it at the time, but I just needed a friend.

I told myself I would be fine, that I didn’t need anyone. I closed up my heart and refused to let anyone else in. I stayed home far more often than I should have, and I relied heavily on my husband to bear the lonely pieces of my heart.

Then he deployed.

I was thrown into this ugly sea of isolation and felt whispers in my ear that I was just not worthy of friendship.

I scrolled through social media feeds and watched as my friends talked about their tribe. I longed for a friend, but I just told myself I was an introvert. I made myself believe this was just the way I would live for the rest of my life.

Until I couldn’t anymore.

RELATED: It’s OK to Admit You’re Not OK, Mama

My breaking point was ugly. Tears streamed down my face as I looked around at the scene before me. The contents of our dog’s food and water bowl painted my kitchen floor. In the midst of all the chaos, there she was, my beautiful 2-year-old. Tears poured from her eyes as she looked up at me with confusion. My outburst resulted in kicking the bowls across the room and then suddenly regretting my actions. I quickly scooped her up in my arms, and we embraced each other with broken forgiveness.

It was in this moment, I realized I needed help.

After much counseling and several acquaintanceships later, God did it. He gave me my tribe.

I found these reliable people who cared about me, my family, and my well-being. These strong women came in my life with this warrior spirit and took on my baggage. They built up my self-esteem and carried some of my weight. They cried with me and folded my laundry and built me up in ways I could never explain.

RELATED: To the Friends Who Stay—Thank You

This one is for my girls.

Girls, you are my favorite human beings. I could never put into words the love I have for you, but I’d like to try. You are the rainbow at the end of my storm. You are the creamer to my coffee and the dry shampoo to my crazy days. Thank you for being my people and showing me that adult relationships do exist.

I love you girls.

You are my people.

Lindsey Carson

Lindsey Carson is a christian mom blogger that spends her days chasing babies and chugging coffee. She was raised in New Mexico and holds the Zia Symbol close to her heart as she learns the ins and outs of east coast living. She enjoys writing about her adventures in motherhood, marriage, and redemption at www.lovefaithandtonsofgrace.com.

Dear Friend, I Don’t Want To Lose You

In: Friendship
Two women smiling, color photo

I’m sorry I don’t text you like I should. I’m sorry I don’t call you like I should. I’m sorry I don’t check in to see how you are. I’m sorry this friendship can feel one-sided at times. I’m sorry I’m so distant. The truth is I’m struggling. I’m struggling with life. I’m struggling with finances. I’m struggling with trying to please everyone and do everything. RELATED: Check on Your “Strong” Friend, She’s Faking it The problem is I try to please everyone—everyone who doesn’t matter. My problem is I’ve gotten so content with our friendship that I know you’ll...

Keep Reading

Not All Friendships Are Meant for Forever

In: Friendship
Sad woman looking at phone

There are friends for a reason, a season, and a lifetime. When we embark on a friendship, we have high hopes that those beginning seeds will blossom into forever. But the time and nurturing required of that kind of friendship is reserved for a few, special people who mesh into our souls and lives seamlessly year after year. There are reasons friendships are short-lived, and those are often obvious. Maybe it was to fulfill a need for you—whether physically or emotionally. These relationships are short, usually sweet, and the ending comes as swiftly as it began.  RELATED: Our Friendship Was...

Keep Reading

This House is Far From Perfect, But its Doors Are Always Open

In: Friendship, Living
Partially painted wall, color photo

This is my kitchen and dining area in all its unfinished glory. Just one project of many that I don’t have much time to work on but am working away at, little by little. I’m tempted to feel embarrassed about it and not want people to see it. However, I also want to regularly invite people into my home, and I believe hospitality is very important no matter what the state of your home is. I’ve decided I won’t let a messy house, dog hair, or unfinished projects keep me from having people over. Because it’s not about the house...

Keep Reading

I Want to Be a Friend Who Listens

In: Friendship, Living
A group of friends smiling at the camera, color photo

“So then, the kids were so out of sorts since they had stayed up late, that I just totally lost it and . . .” “Oh my gosh, I know! Mine were the same way Saturday night! Everybody was crying and . . .” And no one was able to finish their story. Sound familiar? As a person who likes to talk, a lot, I’m guilty of this conversation style. I get stuck in my own head, and I fail to listen. When a friend is telling a story, I immediately have the thought, “Yes! Me too! Same here!” and...

Keep Reading

Some Friendships Aren’t Meant to Last Forever

In: Friendship
Women walking together

Make new friends but keep the old. One is silver and the other is gold. As a young girl, I remember hearing this song and not truly understanding what it meant at the time. As an adult, I see the value in it. True friendships, especially for women, are priceless and worth more than any amount of silver or gold. We are bonded, like a family or community. The friendships we have as children and the friendships we gain as we get older are not the same. Some of the best relationships in my life are with my childhood friends....

Keep Reading

Can You Be a Gap Filler?

In: Friendship, Motherhood
two women talking with coffee cups in hands

When my sister-in-law had her first baby, feelings of jealousy and anger rose to the surface and caught me off guard. As a mother of four, I expected to feel only happiness for her as she became a mother. But, while I did feel happy for her, I didn’t expect the raw emotions of a year prior, when we welcomed our twins, to bubble to the surface.  I felt jealous her husband had four months of paid leave. My husband had none with any of our four children. I felt jealous that she had a village. Her parents, my in-laws,...

Keep Reading

Find the People Who Will Root for You

In: Friendship, Kids, Motherhood
Empty sports field, color photo

My son participated in tryouts out for a new travel soccer team at the end of a recreational fall soccer season one chilly evening in November. He has been playing recreational soccer since he was three years old when we started with the local club. He has been asking about joining a travel team since kindergarten. In recent seasons, I watched him struggle in the recreational league. I watched him wanting a little bit more in the sport as he developed his passion—he was ready to grow.  We knew he loved soccer, and it was something he had always wanted...

Keep Reading

I Know My Friends Aren’t Bothered by My Messy House, but I Am

In: Friendship, Living, Motherhood
Sad woman by laundry pile

My house screams at me. It screams to clear off the kitchen counters, to put away the clean clothes, to organize the shoe collection in our entry, to gather up the scattered toys, to sweep the crumbs up, to place the throw pillows back on the couch, to clean off the table—you get the idea. Everything in my sight speaks volumes to the state it does not want to be in, for the chaos it is imposing.  Keeping home is a labor of love and never of balance for me. Everything that is cleaned, made, or organized will always get...

Keep Reading

Friends Can Be a Sanctuary

In: Friendship, Grief
Group of friends hugging

A sanctuary is defined as anywhere people go for peaceful tranquility or introspection. My friends became my sanctuary when my husband, Frank, died. They became my refuge and my safe place. Friendship is one of the most wonderful gifts in this world. It is beautiful, comforting, ever-changing, and, for me, a fixed point.  My friends seemed to know exactly what I needed and when I needed it. Their love and constant support got me through the worst of times and gave me the courage and confidence I needed to move forward.  I could never give an adequate thank you to...

Keep Reading

What If the Woman Who Seems to Have It All Actually Admires You?

In: Friendship, Living, Motherhood

I’ve known her for a long time, and as long as I’ve known her, she’s always been beautiful. Beautiful on the inside and even more beautiful on the outside. Her makeup is perfectly done, her hair with not a strand out of place. And her clothes? Chic. She is well put together, always in vogue. While I have recycled the same clothes for the past five years, she is on point with the latest trends. She can even rock a pair of sweatpants. Her pictures on Facebook and Instagram posts confirm this as well. (She also has a successful career,...

Keep Reading

5 Secrets to the

BEST Summer Ever!

FREE EMAIL BONUS

Creating simple summer memories

with your kids that will  last a lifetime