Let’s face it, as a new mom there so many changes in your life. The newest one may not be the appearance of your ever so loving body or the new person in your house. It’s how some sentences just make your skin crawl and your blood pressure rise! Here are a few things no soul should ever say to a new mom!
You wanted this!
Yes, it was my choice to procreate. Yes, I get that. However, when you have that baby fever you don’t remember the sleepless nights, the clothing covered in baby vomit, or the aching breast. You remember the itty-bitty clothes, that sweet smell of baby’s head, or that first smile. When a new mommy is having a rough day, covered in bodily fluids, and has not slept since her third month of pregnancy, please don’t tell her this was her choice.
You knew there could be days…
Yes, I knew that motherhood, (the first or the second time around), was not going to be butterflies and unicorn farts. I knew it was going to be hard! You are responsible for this new little life! You know there are going to be terrible-two melt downs over putting on shoes, diaper blows at the most non-convenient times (most of the time it’s all over you too), and hormone surges that rival puberty. However, on those rare days, where you can’t just laugh it off, you are allowed to have a melt down. It’s OK to cry as you hold the bathroom door shut, shake your arms to the heavens, or to eat the hot fudge directly out of the jar.
I think she/he is hungry….
Ughhh… there is nothing I hate hearing more! I have dedicated myself to be a nursing mom, which means I have become a 24/7 food service machine. Which I am happy to do! It burns off a ton of calories for me; it’s like having a treadmill strapped to your chest! Sure I can eat that extra cookie, heck I am nursing I am burning those calories! However, there is nothing worse when you hear those dreadful words from your husband at 2:00 am, “I think it’s hungry…”Another time I HATE to hear it is when I am at grocery store and every old lady I pass has to tell me that my baby must be hungry. Yes, I understand that the baby is a little fussy, however it’s just that he/she is hot or upset that it has had to spend the last hour in the car seat. Hunger is not a cure all for every noise it makes.
Is the baby sleeping through the night?
What you should say to a new mom
After I had my son, there was one mom friend that sat down looked me in the eye and asked me “how are you holding up?” It almost brought me to tears! After weeks of answering questions about birth weight, sleep habits, and how big sister was handling it, it was one the first times someone had asked me about me rather about the baby first!
This small kindness can go a long way! When you don’t know what to say to a mom who is looking rough or having a hard time – just say, “How are you doing?”