The calls have been frequent in the past year or so. 

“Guess who’s pregnant!”

“The wedding is scheduled for December.”

My nana has 11 grandchildren total, me and my sister and our nine cousins. Only four of us have not married, become pregnant, or had a baby this year. I am one of the four.

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After so many phone calls celebrating the family news, I started to feel a little boring . . . and washed up, maybe?

There has been no life-altering news from my house, nor do I plan for there to be. 

We did buy a new (to us) car. Our old one almost died on the way home from vacation, and our mechanic said it was probably a good move. You don’t put that out on the family phone tree, though. 

We welcomed three new pets, one for each kid. Our oldest picked a hamster. His twin sister has a black and white kitten named Oreo, and our youngest adopted Oreo’s brother and named him Screwdriver. The pets have brought lots of joy, but there are no pet showers or birth announcements. 

As I stood in the kitchen making a very boring dinner on a boring day and thinking about the latest family news, it hit me. I don’t want the excitement of weddings or babies anymore.

We have been there and done that. We have had our moments of excitement that quickly spread through the entire family. Instead, we celebrated our 16th wedding anniversary this year and our youngest turned four. We are past the major life milestones of the young adult years. 

And, you know what? I am good with that. 

This stage of life has many blessings. 

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The kids can talk and laugh and ask for the things they need. They can (with permission) get their own snacks. They play sports and have friends and do homework. They have questions about the world around them

When we traveled to our hometown this fall, we made it with only one bathroom break. No diapers needed to be changed. No children screamed because pacifiers were lost in a car seat. When we arrived, the kids unbuckled themselves and climbed out. They helped carry their own duffle bags. When it was time for bed, they got ready for bed with very little help. 

Days are sometimes still very stressful, but they have settled into a peaceful normal.

It may not be a normal that is celebrated with the extended family, but it is a normal that I welcome and cherish.   

I will happily attend the bridal showers, the baby showers, and weddings for my sister and cousins. I will hold the babies and fondly remember the days when my own were that little. I will celebrate with my family.  

And, occasionally, for a fleeting moment, I will miss the excitement of wedding planning or the sweetness of holding an infant. But for the most part, I am extraordinarily grateful for where we are in life, even if it is a little . . . boring.

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Kara Minor

Kara is a mom of three, pastor's wife, and English teacher. Born and raised in southern Indiana, she now lives in Michigan with her family, one dog, three cats, and a hamster.

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