So God Made a Mother Collection ➔

We live in a world where anyone and their mom are so quick to judge every single move you make. It has simply become a normal part of everyday life. Sure, I could write a nice long piece talking about how important it is that we change before it is too late; but plenty of those are already out there. If I am being completely honest, one more “be nice” article is not going to change anything, it is our actual actions that will. Don’t get me wrong! I have even written a similar piece before, maybe even two or three. The idea is nice of course but… oops I am getting off on a tangent. Where were we? Right! I think that religion especially has become a touchy subject.

Before I continue, you need a little background. I was born and raised being taught the morals of a certain church. I certainly was not a model child for the faith, I was not a model child in any aspect really. Thankfully, my family is great and my parents have come leaps and bounds. Having a child now, my husband and I have been faced with the decision on how we would like to raise our little girl. While I was a bit rebellious, I am thankful for my religious background. It helped to teach me morals and limits (even though I did not necessarily always follow through with them). I am not naive in knowing that children can certainly be taught to be good people without going to church. There is evidence of that daily everywhere I go. The only problem is that I have never been in those shoes on either side. As silly as it sounds, I do not know how to play those cards.

I consider myself to be spiritual, but not religious. By no means does that mean that I am against any religion (even though I spent too long loathing the one I grew up in). I respect them all in their uniqueness and the fact that they can better the people that they are right for. However, I worry constantly about unintentionally forcing my values onto my daughter. I worry that she will not feel able to chose a religion if one feels right to her because her mother does not attend, there are no roots in her family, or even because it is the one her mother grew away from. Basically, I worry about doing the exact thing that I hope to avoid.

How do I stop one of my greatest fears from happening? I let her choose. I educate her from a young age. I teach her to be open minded, and I expose her to the many forms of faith and religion out there. What else could I do? I will not tell her that she is not allowed to pick a religion because that is what I *so far* have done. I will not tell her that she must become the religion that her extended family believes in. She has her own individual personality and feelings, and what feels right to her is what feels right to her. Nothing more, nothing less. It does not change who she is as a person. If I can help her find something that will help her to thrive as a human being? That is what I will consider a success.

Now I certainly am not pushing this idea on anyone. We live in a wonderful and diverse world and I am no one to suggest what others should do other than teaching their little ones to be good humans. That is what we all hope for as parents right?

Rounding it back up to the beginning, we will be judged for whatever we do, I simply suggest you rock what you are doing and do not apologize for it.

Savanna Monroy

Savanna was born and raised in Utah. She lives there still, but now with her amazing husband and baby girl. Savanna is currently working and blogging while fulfilling her favorite duties of being a wife and mom. You can follow her journey as she advocates for normality for young mothers at http://meandmylittle.com/

While I Wait for Another Door to Open, I’ll Hold One For Someone Else

In: Faith, Living
Woman teaching another woman by computer

I’m waiting for another door. All my life, I’ve been told that when God closes one door, He opens another. And here I am, staring at the imminent end of the business I’ve built from nothing. Closing down what I started up from sheer willpower, too much caffeine, and the bold determination to work for myself. Scratching out what I made from scratch . . . and it feels horrible. God didn’t just close this door. He slammed it shut, boarded the whole thing up, and hammered the nails in where I cannot pry them open. Believe me. I’ve tried....

Keep Reading

Separating Work From Home is a Must For Me

In: Faith, Motherhood
Mom with baby smiling

If I close my eyes and let myself, I can still see the 11-year-old boy with his pale feet sticking out from under the blanket, on his way to the morgue after a gun accident.   If I close my eyes and let myself, I can still see the still, blue form of the 3-month-old who passed away in his sleep. We gave CPR and all the medicines “just in case,” but that baby was gone long before his caregiver brought him in through the door. If I close my eyes and let myself, I can still see the 3-year-old...

Keep Reading

When Teens Are Hard to Love, You Love Them Harder

In: Faith, Motherhood, Teen
Teen boy sitting with hood up

I lay face down on the floor, praying. Praying in the loosest sense of the word. Praying in the Romans 8:26 way—you know, when the Spirit “intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.” Because I could not utter any actual coherent thoughts at that point. I was weary and beaten down. Day after day I had been in combat, battling an opponent I didn’t anticipate: one of my children. My own child, one of the people I had lovingly grown inside my body and loved sacrificially for all these years, had staunchly and repeatedly put himself in opposition...

Keep Reading

In This Stage of Marriage, it Feels Like We’re Roommates Who Share the Same Kids

In: Faith, Marriage
Distant couple on phones in bed

How do you get it back? How do you get back the love you once had? Everyone told me marriage was hard and having kids was hard, but I had no idea it would be this hard. I thought everyone was lying because our relationship was solid before marriage. We were best friends. Some days I feel like we’re roommates who share the same kids. It disgusts me even to say that, but it’s the truth. Marriage is hard and has ugly sides to it that everyone seems afraid to talk about. RELATED: Keep Showing Up Even When Marriage is...

Keep Reading

You Are the God of Details, but God These Details Don’t Make Sense

In: Faith, Grief, Loss
Window open with shutters

That was not the plan. What just happened in there? We walked out a bit defeated. More than a bit. I felt deflated. Things were supposed to be different by now. This wasn’t what I asked for or expected. This wasn’t even what they told me would happen. We cross the street in silence. Headed to the car and as soon as I shut the car door, I could no longer hold it in. I let the tears flow. All this unknown. I don’t understand. This is life. This is foster care. This is what we chose. That doesn’t make...

Keep Reading

I Am a Good Enough Mom

In: Faith, Motherhood
Mother kissing toddler

I came to motherhood knowing nothing about the job. My mother’s example wasn’t an example at all, more of something to forget, and maybe even get therapy for. My own son was the first newborn I’d ever held. When I became a mom, I was 23 and clueless.  Because of my personality, I wanted to do everything right and parenthood was no exception. I read all the books on parenting I could. I talked to older moms and soaked up all the advice they gave me. Having no idea what I was doing made me look to outside sources to inform...

Keep Reading

God’s Plan For Me Wasn’t What I Expected

In: Faith, Motherhood
Woman walking with children silhouette

I grew up in a family where we knew who God was. We went to church, and we were involved in church. However, when we weren’t at church, time spent in the Word fell to the wayside. Don’t get me wrong, my parents were wonderful people, but we didn’t make that a priority in my house.  Going into adulthood, I realized I had deceived myself into believing I had a relationship with God. I knew God loved me, but I questioned whether I loved Him. I wasn’t living life in a way that was glorifying to Him. I’m not only...

Keep Reading

But God is Still Good

In: Faith, Living
Woman looking out window

“I can’t afford a new one,” I thought to myself as I shampooed another stain. This can’t keep happening. Maybe I made a mistake. I have to make this last. And the couch. And the clothes. And all the things. We are done having babies. The price of food has doubled. It’s astronomical to fill the cars with gas. Things are closing in on me. How can I best serve my family? Survival mode engaged. When I read the news, when I follow the headlines, when I listen to the conversations around me . . .  I hear fear. Loss....

Keep Reading

Jesus Helps Me Smile Through the Weary Moments of Motherhood

In: Faith, Motherhood
Woman holding toddler girl, color photo

“Mom, why aren’t you smiling?” My 4-year-old took one look at my face, and like an open book, she could read me. Sometimes I wish I could hide it better, tucked behind an infinite smile or a pasted-on happy face. Sometimes I wish my beautiful children—so young, free, and fun—wouldn’t see my face on a day like today. RELATED: Motherhood is Hard, But Loving You is the Easiest Thing I’ve Ever Done You see, it’s just so hard—all of it. And I am just so tired. Between working a job, trying to keep up with being a supportive wife and...

Keep Reading

The Guilt of an Angry Mother Meets Grace

In: Faith, Motherhood
Mother and son hug at home

“No one’s perfect,” I think. I’m mopping up my overspilled anger like the remnants of an erupted chocolate volcano that hit the kitchen floor.  It was the last bucking whine of “I don’t want chocolate in my milk” that did it. The culmination of about one million “I want chocolate in my milk”s ended with a sticky muddy river of it from highchair to floor.  After reasoning with my toddler, which never works well, I gave in to his adamant refusal of white milk for a chocolatey exchange. He responded to my surrender like a 2-year-old. He revolted. Little feet...

Keep Reading

Get our FREE phone wallpaper to encourage you as the new school year begins

It's bittersweet for a mother to watch her child grow—but you both are ready to soar.