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Something I struggle with is constantly worrying about what other people think of me or what they may think of me if I do something. Before making the move to do practically anything, I will first stop to think, “But what will others think of me if I do this?”

Then, if I have any hesitation or if I think there may be the slightest bit of judgment, I will stop myself.

Is this healthy? No. Not in the slightest bit. I’m basically letting other people run my life purely out of fear of the unknown. This has prevented me from trying something new many, many times. It’s a terrible habit to have as it holds you back in life. Consequently, making you unhappy with not only yourself but with life in general. I’m not alone in this though. Many people have this same struggle. So, why do we do this to ourselves?

Why do we care so much about what others may or may not think of us?

Why do we hold ourselves back from doing things we know would make us happy? It’s not like anything we want to do is going to hurt or affect anyone else. So, what’s our reasoning? Anxiety? Fear of failure? The truth is, we need these in our lives.

We need some anxiety. It helps us think things through and question things so we make better decisions. It can also serve as motivation to help you get through challenges you may be facing in your life.

We need to fail in life sometimes. Failure helps us learn. The key is to allow yourself to fail and then ask yourself what went wrong and how you could improve next time. Then try again!

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Having these in our lives from time to time helps us grow and become stronger people. Without these, you will not grow, you will not gain strength or confidence in yourself, and you will not learn things that you potentially could have.

Fear of judgment? We need to learn how to move past this fear.

People are entitled to their own opinions. We cannot control what others think or say about us. But we can control how we react to them. We can choose to either let them bring us down and let them control our lives, or we can be strong and let their opinions roll off our shoulders. The choice is ours.

Yes, others’ negative opinions about us may be hurtful. They may make us very upset. But we need to learn to not let this bother us. We need to realize that how others think about us is not a true reflection of who we are, but rather a reflection of who they are. They have their own insecurities and are trying to bring you down to make themselves feel better. So be the bigger person and let others’ opinions roll off your shoulders.

Nevertheless, when a person does call you down or call you a failure, does it make it true? Does this person have the final say on whether you are good enough to try something? Does this person have the right to dictate the direction your life goes in? Is this person better than you just because they may think they are? The answer to every one of these questions is no!

You are the only one who can dictate how you live your life.

You need to take charge. You need to believe in yourself. You need to take control of your negative thoughts and learn how to change them into positive ones. You must be the first one to believe in yourself. Once you do, your confidence will shine through for others to see.

Constant worrying is a waste of energy. Honestly, people are so preoccupied with their own lives these days that the majority aren’t thinking too much about what is going on in your life.

We need to get out of our heads and start living our life the way we want. We’re only hurting ourselves by making all these assumptions about how others may or may not be thinking about us. The people who matter in our lives will be proud of us no matter how things turn out. They will be supportive. All they want is for us to do what makes us happy. As for everyone else, they may be proud as well or they may not be or they may have no opinion at all. But does it matter anyway what they think?

Some people may have valid reasons for why they think the way they do about your decisions. Why they may be concerned. And it is always a good idea to listen to these reasons. To hear them out and take them into consideration. Maybe tweak your original idea a bit if the points are valid. Everyone sees things from a different perspective, so talking things through with supportive people can be quite beneficial.

But ultimately, if you feel deep down that you want to try something, go for it.

Try it. Make mistakes along the way. Learn from those mistakes and try, try again. This is the only way you grow as a person. The only way you become stronger and gain confidence in yourself. The only way you will meet people with similar interests.

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Only you can truly see the vision you have for yourself in life. Only you can be the true judge of your own character. Only you can look deep within and know who you truly are and what you are capable of in life.

If you have a vision for how you want your life to be, a goal you want to obtain, then you shouldn’t let other people stop you. You should go for it. If you let other people’s opinions always stop you in life, then you will never succeed. You will never be happy. You will have many regrets and resentment.

So, take that very first step and try something new. Live your life the way you want to. Stop fearing what others may think. Stop being so afraid of judgment. Believe in yourself. Believe in your dreams and your direction in life. Don’t let others stop you from what you really want out of this one life of yours. Don’t waste it away out of fear. Take charge of your own life and live it the way that you want to. Live it to your fullest potential.

Courtney Hughes

I'm a busy mom of four, soon to be five, little ones! My bonus son is 9, my daughter is 6, and my two youngest boys are 4 and 1. With the final addition coming this summer. There's always something to do and always someone to tend to! We reside in the country on the East Coast of Canada with my husband. I recently took up blogging and started my own online shop, MaritimeMamaShop, as a little side hobby for myself. Motherhood is a wonderful, but hard journey, and we moms need a little something for ourselves to keep our sanity! Come visit me at www.themaritimemamashop.com! You can also follow me on Facebook or Instagram @maritimemamashop

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