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I sent an email to my second-grader’s teacher this morning. After writing it, I realized it might be beneficial for others to read it and understand this as wellnot just teachers, but parents, siblings, and friends of those with all special needs, not just autism.

𝐆𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠, 

𝐈 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐉𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐈 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐲𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐝𝐚𝐲. 𝐒𝐨 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭, 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞, 𝐉𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐚𝐬𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐦 𝐰𝐚𝐬. 𝐈𝐭’𝐬 𝐟𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐨 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈 𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐞 𝐡𝐞 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐬 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐨𝐟 𝐮𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐚𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐦 𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜. 

𝐀𝐥𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐨𝐟𝐟-𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐝, 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭 . . . 

𝐖𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬’. 𝐈 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐬𝐨 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐑𝐮𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐥𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐧 𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐠𝐞, 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐧 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐠𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐘 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐦. 

RELATED: My Child Has Autism and He is Awesome

𝐈 𝐚𝐥𝐬𝐨 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐦. 

𝐈 𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐱𝐚𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐒𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐥 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐰𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐦, 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐮𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐟𝐟, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐦𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐬; 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐞𝐱𝐚𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞, 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐛𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐚 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐥𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐮𝐛 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐭 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐦. 𝐖𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐣𝐮𝐦𝐩 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐥𝐚𝐩, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐩𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐦 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐦𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐫 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐱𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐝. 𝐖𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐛𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐧 𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐠𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧’𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐜𝐮𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐛𝐞 𝐯𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐥 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧’𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐞. 𝐖𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐮𝐩—𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬, 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐬, 𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬, 𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐬—𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐝𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐩𝐞𝐝 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐦 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐚𝐬 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥. 

𝐀𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐈 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥, 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐈 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝, “𝐒𝐨, 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐝𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬?”  

𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐛𝐥𝐞, 𝐚𝐬 𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 “𝐈𝐭’𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐬𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐨𝐥! 𝐒𝐨 𝐈 𝐚𝐦 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐦?”

“𝐖𝐞𝐥𝐥, 𝐧𝐨, 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐉𝐚𝐜𝐤, 𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐨𝐲, 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐦,” 𝐈 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 

𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐚 𝐛𝐢𝐠 𝐬𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐮𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐚𝐲.  

𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐚𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐚 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞 𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐥. 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐥𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐈 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐠𝐧𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐬, 𝐈 𝐝𝐨 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐢𝐟 𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐨 𝐬𝐨. 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐈 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐬 𝐮𝐩 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐩 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐞𝐟𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐢𝐟 𝐡𝐞𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐞𝐱𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐝𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐬.

RELATED: Don’t Be Afraid to Talk to Your Children About My Child With Special Needs

In sharing this with all of YOU, as well as Jack’s teacher, my hope is that more conversations might be had regarding all kinds of special needs. 

As I shared with Jack, we are all so very different in many ways. These differences make us uniquely wonderful, and they deserve to be celebrated, talked about, understood, and accepted more. 

Not just in the classroom, but out there in the whole world.

Originally published on the author’s Facebook page

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Vanessa France

Vanessa France is a mom of 4 children - ages 13, 12, 10, and 7. After struggling with her mental health and losing herself in alcohol addiction - she is now 2 years+ sober, and recovers out loud in hopes to help others that may find themselves in the grips of the lonely world of addiction in motherhood. She is co-owner of Zen Yoga & Wellness, a yoga and wellness center that focuses on total wellness in mind, body and soul; where she loves to share the life-changing practice of yoga that is paramount in her healing and recovery. She is an autism advocate, helping to raise awareness and acceptance of neurodiversity in any way she can. She is fueled by her faith, family and fitness; all which help carry her through her sobriety. Facebook: www.Facebook.com/VanessaFrance Instagram: www.instagram.com/_vanessafrance_

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