So God Made a Mother Collection ➔

We like to talk a lot about how tired moms are, right? 

“I was up six times with the baby last night. I’m so tired!” 
“We have two doctor’s appointments, piano lessons, and a soccer game after school. I’m so tired!” 
“I’ve had three cups of coffee and it’s not even 9 a.m. yet. I’m so tired!” 

I mean, it’s true—motherhood is one of the most tiring things you’ll ever do. 

But you know what I’ve learned four kids and almost a decade into this gig? What’s making me weary isn’t my lack of shut-eye.

Truthfully? That’s the easy part. (Because caffeine.)

It’s the part they don’t warn you about, the part that’s wrapped in that well-worn receiving blanket with your brand new bundle of joy that exhausts a mother down to her very core: the mental work of motherhood.

It’s freaking exhausting.

Every day, I do all the things for all the people: get the dog to the groomer; make yet another Target run; boil more water for another box of macaroni and cheese; brush teeth; braid hair; sort laundry; schedule an oil change; hunt down the “right” kind of string cheese; quiz spelling words; mend pants. 

But what you don’t see—what no one can prepare you for—is the way I’m constantly assessing and tending to the well-being of each one of my children (and my husband, for good measure). It’s like a sliding scale that never stops moving, and it’s loaded down with so much emotional weight it would squash a grown elephant like an ant. 

Is my son having a good day at school—or are those girls who’ve been bothering him lately hurting his tender heart and triggering his anxiety? 

Is my daughter mulling over questions about her soon-to-be-changing body that she’s afraid to ask—or am I doing enough to keep our lines of communication open? 

Is my preschooler going to cope well enough when her dad and I go out of town for a few nights next week?

Is my husband overwhelmed by shifting dynamics at work that he doesn’t want to bother me with?

At least the baby’s easy—all she does is get me up at night. 

See, it’s not the tasks of motherhood that do me in, that exhaust me from the tips of my toes to the split ends of my neglected hair. I mean, let’s face it—a marginally trained monkey could de-crust peanut butter sandwiches and semi-reliably pilot the van to Sunday school. 

But the ongoing attention to these precious souls on loan from God? That’s the kind of work that never lets up—the kind of work that I alone can do. 

It’s work that shifts just when you think you’ve got it figured out, that whirls you back around to square one with a sly little maniacal laugh. 

It’s work that no vat of coffee or bottomless McDonald’s Coke can even begin to suppress or smooth out around the edges. 

It’s why I’m exhausted, friends. It’s why we’re all so unbelievably exhausted all the time. 

And I don’t know, maybe it’s high time we start talking about THAT instead.

Read This Next: Why Tired Mothers Stay Up So Late


Carolyn Moore

Carolyn has served as Editor-in-Chief of Her View From Home since 2017. A long time ago, she worked in local TV news and fell in love with telling stories—something she feels grateful to help women do every day at HVFH. She lives in flyover country with her husband and four kids but is really meant to be by the ocean with a good book and a McDonald's fountain Coke. 

As My Children Grow, I Miss It All—Even the Sick Days

In: Kids, Motherhood
Toddler on mom's shoulder

I whisk my daughter through the doors of urgent care and cradle her head as I stand behind three other mamas clinging to their babies. We’re each rocking in different ways but moving nonetheless. The silent, comforting rhythm of motherhood. I see sad, sick eyes from the babies with their heads nestled into the necks of their mama. I’m tired from the sleepless night, and I shift from foot to foot. There is hushing and humming and back-patting. A pacifier drops to the floor. All of a sudden my daughter feels heavy. A vague sinking feeling comes over me, like...

Keep Reading

Life with Autism Is Full of Ticking Time Bombs

In: Kids, Motherhood
Mother, father, teen daughter, color photo

Many of us who live with autism are familiar with the comings and goings of the ticking time bomb—one that disappears for periods of time, so much so that we might forget about it. Then, suddenly, this bomb drops at our doorstep in the form of a returning or new obstacle, so intense that it causes us to pause our lives, alter our plans, maybe even change our current paths. For our family, the new challenge has been sudden, piercing, sporadic screams. Not constant, not even often, thankfully, but jolting nonetheless. So here we were, in the midst of our...

Keep Reading

Youth Sports Build Strong Kids

In: Kids
Young girl with gymnastics medal, color photo

My kids are heavily involved in sports. My son plays for an elite basketball team and my daughter competes on an Xcel gymnastics team. It takes up a lot of our time and a lot of our money. Even though prioritizing youth sports seems to be an American norm, we still sometimes receive criticism and judgment as to why we would spend so much of our time and resources on it. (“Don’t you know the chances of your child going pro is less than 1%?”) As I sat at my daughter’s gymnastics meet, listening to the parents cheer so excitedly...

Keep Reading

Don’t Let Anyone Rush You, Mama

In: Kids, Motherhood
Mother with two kids at home relaxing

From the moment our children are born, other people make it challenging to stay in the present moment—they start asking questions that look forward instead of at the now we are in. Can you believe how big she’s getting, where did your newborn go? Oh my goodness, he’ll be walking any day now! Are you thinking about preschool? What will you do when they’re both in school? What will you do when your baby goes to college? While these questions may come with good intentions, they’re not helpful at all. We moms need to be allowed to be fully in...

Keep Reading

Dear Child, God Sees All of You—And So Do I

In: Faith, Kids, Motherhood
Mom and young son painting together

Math has always come easily to him. Even from the beginning stages when we counted wooden blocks on the living room floor, the numbers just came to him. “How many blocks are there?” I asked him, pointing to the scattered row of blocks. I expected him to count them. He was only three or four years old. “Six,” he answered promptly. “Yes . . . but how did you know that?” I asked hesitantly. He had not taken the time necessary to have counted them. “Three and three are six,” he replied. And on it went. The math came easily,...

Keep Reading

Kids Crave Your Time, Not Fancy Things

In: Kids, Motherhood
Dad and daughter with basketball smiling

I have four kids, and like most parents, I’m doing my best to give them a happy childhood, but we’re not really an activity family. Don’t get me wrong, we love a good day trip to the local water park or a night out at the movies, but with several different ages and a tight budget, activities or outings are rare for us. Sometimes I end up feeling bad about it, like our kids are missing out, but then I take a deep breath and realize that some of the best moments come from the simplest of things. Lucky for...

Keep Reading

Dear Kindergarten Graduate—Wherever Life Takes You, I’ll Always Be Your Safe Place To Land

In: Kids, Motherhood

I cried on your first day of kindergarten. Did you know that? I held it together through the getting ready and the goodbyes—but once I had waved one last time and was pulling out of the parking lot, the lump in my throat poured out as hot tears down my cheeks.  How could you be starting kindergarten? You, my precious firstborn baby. We had some growing pains as we adjusted to a new routine. The school days were so long. I spent my days missing you and you spent yours missing me. We were apart from each other more than...

Keep Reading

The Secret to Slowing Down Time Is to Notice the Moments You’re Living In

In: Kids, Motherhood

Dear current self, You’ve heard a lot of mothers admonish you to slow down and enjoy every moment with your children. They’ve warned you with phrases like “before you know it,”  “in the blink of an eye,” and other cliché’s that haven’t really hit you, but they will. Soon, they will. I am writing you now because I’ve seen you trying to wrap your mind around the how-to—as if holding time in your hand is a skill anyone has successfully mastered. I’ll save you the suspense. It can’t be done. It is inevitable. Your kids are going to grow up....

Keep Reading

You Don’t Have to Celebrate a Holiday Just Because It’s On the Calendar

In: Kids, Living

I switched on the computer, adjusted my chair, then quickly swiveled back around again toward my husband, “Are you sure? You don’t mind?” “Me?” he made a swift waving motion as if swatting a fly. “Psht. Yeah, I’m fine with it. You?” He lifted his head and locked our eyes a little more securely, “Are you sure?” “Yes,” I said firmly, without hesitation. “OK, good,” my man turned back to his phone, “Love you.” “Good,” I confirmed. A rush of relief swept through me as muscles I didn’t even know were tense suddenly relaxed. A bubbling surge of energy had...

Keep Reading

I’m Raising Wild Boys

In: Kids, Motherhood
Young boy and toddler smiling at each other, color photo

Yesterday my boys (two and eight) were playing outside in our cul-de-sac—running, yelling, tackling each other . . . all the normal stuff. One of the neighbor moms was out as well, looking on as her son joined the fray.  “I need to send him over to your house for a week or two,” she joked, “so he can get more in touch with his boyness.”  “No, you don’t want to do that. My boys are wild things,” I quickly replied. And I wasn’t joking. My sons are rough, tough, primal beings.  Moments before this conversation, my oldest was ramming...

Keep Reading

 5 Secrets to Connect with Your Kids


Proven techniques to build REAL connections