Our Keepsake Journal is Here! 🎉

My middle child. My wild child. My absolutely, positively difficult child. 

She was my easiest birth. After going overdue with the two pregnancies before her and laboring for 12+ hours with them, my middle child arrived one day before her due date in a beautiful, natural birth lasting only six hours.

She went on to be a very easy baby, too. A self-soothing queen who would sleep through the night at just a few weeks old. She hit all the milestones early, weaned herself from me without any pain or trouble, and potty trained easily at just two years old. 

RELATED: The Secret No One Told Me About the Toddler Years is How Much I Could Absolutely Love Them

People would tell us, as they like to do when you’re experiencing joy in parenting, that these weren’t necessarily good things. “Easy babies become difficult toddlers,” they would say. I don’t think that’s always true.

But we did learn the meaning of difficult soon enough.

I should have seen it coming when she came into the kitchen one winter morning before she turned three, telling me she didn’t sleep well and needed a coffee. It was all downhill from there.

Still sweet. Healthy and strong. But also wild.

She tests her boundaries, outside the reach of normal boundary testing. We now have four other children to compare it to, so trust me on this.

She does the polar opposite of what I tell her to do most of the time.

She doesn’t listen. Ever.

If you think that’s an exaggeration, I invite you to spend a couple of hours at my house to observe it for yourself.

She gets her siblings riled up beyond belief and makes our house sound like an energetic WWE match on a regular Tuesday night.

RELATED: The Mama of the Wild Child is Trying Harder Than You Know

She is the loudest voice heard through the hallways in all of the post-bedtime shenanigans.

She has exited her kindergarten classroom every day since school began by loudly proclaiming, “I. LEARNED. NOTHING!” in front of her teacher and the other parents in the pick-up line.

She is stubborn. So, so stubborn.

She. Never. Finishes. Her. Meals. She sometimes doesn’t even pick at them. She’d rather fend for herself when she feels like eating than sit down and eat a meal that’s been prepared.

I often question where we went wrong in the discipline. While the rest of the kids seem to act right most of the time and have moments of being wild, it sometimes feels like my middle child has only moments of behaving well.

She is untamed.

But being wild and untamed isn’t all bad, crazy stuff.

Let me tell you what else she is:

She is sensitive and compassionate.

She has a tough exterior with melty insides.

RELATED: Behind Every Strong-Willed Child is a Vulnerable Soul

She is sweet and kind.

She gets along well with others.

She is silly with a giggly, infectious laugh.

She’s an old soul. She loves David Bowie and knows all the words to “Bohemian Rhapsody.”

She dances all day. Gets where she’s going in whirls and twirls along the kitchen floor.

She loves to grow things and eat vegetables from her garden. She is selective about picking flowers because she knows they’ll stay beautiful if left in the ground.

She is gentle with animals and babies.

She is brave. She’ll go check out a scene before everyone else to make sure it’s safe.

RELATED: In Defense of the Wild Child

She is super athletic. She’s a fast runner, can do a million push-ups, and mastered the monkey bars on her own when she was two. She’s been climbing on playground equipment not meant for her age group since she was a baby.

She has long, wild hair and throws together some of the craziest outfits I’ve ever seen. She also does not care what anyone thinks of said outfits. Hashtag confidence.

She is strong-willed, a natural-born leader.

She loves Jesus and her worship singing might just bring you to tears.

I wouldn’t change a thing about her. If I traded the challenges, I’d lose all the joys of raising such a beautiful and loving child. Sure, she’s difficult sometimes.

But difficult isn’t the worst thing.

She’s my middle child. My wild child. My absolutely, positively beautiful child. Inside and out. Wild and warm. Tender and tough. Salty and sweet.

She is extraordinary and true. 

Previously published on the author’s Instagram

So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Check out our new Keepsake Companion Journal that pairs with our So God Made a Mother book!

Order Now
So God Made a Mother's Story Keepsake Journal

Jheri Jordan

I am a wife and mother of five, raising arrows in Pennsylvania with my hot, hardworking husband. I love Jesus, coffee, plants, and carbs. I can sometimes be overheard yelling things like, "You don't have to ask permission to poop!" Come hang out with me on Instagram @joyful.growing

Do They Notice My Self-Doubt as a Working Mom?

In: Living, Motherhood
Woman taking a selfie in a bathroom mirror holding a coffee cup

At the office, I forget yet another small detail. Later, I am asked a simple question, something I should know the answer to, and I respond with “I don’t know” because it didn’t even occur to me to have that information on hand. I feel incapable of planning much ahead and insecure about my ability to read through the fine print. Another day of work is missed to be home with a sick baby, it’s been a difficult winter with illness striking our home, including a round of influenza for me. Meetings I was supposed to lead are covered by...

Keep Reading

You Are Someone’s Beautiful

In: Motherhood
Woman hugging herself

It’s 10:45 p.m. For the first time since I “put my face on” this morning, I stood staring back at myself in the mirror. I poked at my eyes and forehead. “How much you’ve changed,” I thought as I noticed new lines and grooves in my face. It’s funny, because earlier in the evening, I sat at my parent’s kitchen island, looking at magnets that hung on their refrigerator. Our daughter’s birth announcement stood out to me. “Wow!” I remarked to my mother who was admiring them with me. “That feels like forever ago.” It was only six years ago when...

Keep Reading

Having Kids Shows Who Your Real Friends Are

In: Friendship, Motherhood
Mother and child walking through forest, color photo

Any mom, typical or special needs, will tell you having kids is the fastest way to tell who your real friends are. When your child is born with special needs this process becomes even more severe and obvious. At first, people visit and want to hold the baby, but once the delays kick in slowly people start to pull away. Disability makes them uncomfortable. That’s the truth. They hope you won’t notice, but you do. Honestly, most stop trying altogether. It’s not just friends who act this way either, sometimes it’s family too. That hurts the most. As a parent...

Keep Reading

Hey Mom, It’s Okay Not to Be Perfect

In: Motherhood
Mother with head in hands and child jumping on couch nearby

Have you ever walked into a room, to an event, or a meeting, where you immediately felt out of place? As if you had come into a foreign space where you were not worthy, or just didn’t belong among the other mothers in the room? Maybe you were not dressed the part. Your hair may have fallen in messy strands around your face, or you may not have taken the time to put on a full face of makeup as the other women in the room had. Maybe your clothing choice of the day was just not quite as put...

Keep Reading

Dear Child, You Are Not Responsible for How Anyone Else Feels about You

In: Kids, Motherhood, Teen, Tween
Teen girl looking in the mirror putting on earrings

Dear kiddo, I have so many dreams for you. A million hopes and desires run through my mind every day on a never-ending loop, along with worries and fears, and so, so much prayer. Sometimes, it feels like my happiness is tied with ropes of steel to yours. And yet, the truth is, there are times you disappoint me. You will continue to disappoint me as you grow and make your own choices and take different paths than the ones I have imagined for you. But I’m going to tell you a secret (although I suspect you already know): My...

Keep Reading

Now I Know How a Mother Is Made

In: Motherhood
Husband, wife, and young son, color photo

It’s been almost three years now, but I can still remember how your 8-pound body felt in my arms. Night after night as we tried to sleep, I remember your sounds, your movements, and your tiny hands. I gave it my all but still felt I fell short. You see sweet little one, you may have been brand new to this world, but so was I. The day you were born, a mother was born too. Things didn’t always go according to plan. It’s hard when you try your best, but you just can’t get there. So many new things...

Keep Reading

I’m Praying for My Teenager in These Challenging Years

In: Faith, Motherhood, Teen
Teen boy holding a smartphone and wearing headphones

In my mid-40s, I began to long for a baby. We didn’t get much encouragement from friends and family. My husband is a high-functioning quadriplegic, and I was considered way too old to start a family. But our marriage was stable, we were used to obstacles, we were financially prepared, emotionally experienced, and our careers were established. I began to paint my own sublime mental portrait of parenting tranquility. What could go wrong? At 48, I delivered a healthy baby boy, and he was perfect. We adored him. The baby we had longed for and prayed for, we had. And...

Keep Reading

Going to Church with Kids is Hard but We’ll Keep Showing Up

In: Faith, Motherhood
Mother holding young daughter in church

Going to church is hard with young kids. It used to be something I looked forward to. It’s something I’ve always valued deeply and needed desperately. It’s the one place that will always be home regardless of what location or building it’s in or what people attend. Church is my sanctuary. But it’s become a battle with the kids’ resistance, my tired mind and body, and my lack of ability to actually listen to the sermon. Going to church is hard with young kids. It’s become normal for me to lie down in bed on Saturday night thinking, with dread,...

Keep Reading

When Motherhood Feels Like a Limitation

In: Faith, Motherhood
Ruth Chou Simons holding book

Twenty-one years ago, my husband Troy and I welcomed our first son into the world. Two years later, I gave birth to another boy. And again two years later, and again two years after that. A fifth boy joined our family another two years later, and a final son was born 11 years after we began our parenting journey. If you were counting, you’re not mistaken—that’s six sons in just over a decade. We were overjoyed and more than a little exhausted. I remember feeling frustrated with the limitations of the little years with young children when I was a...

Keep Reading

I Obsessed over Her Heartbeat Because She’s My Rainbow Baby

In: Grief, Loss, Motherhood
Mother and teen daughter with ice cream cones, color photo

I delivered a stillborn sleeping baby boy five years before my rainbow baby. I carried this sweet baby boy for seven whole months with no indication that he wouldn’t live. Listening to his heartbeat at each prenatal visit until one day there was no heartbeat to hear. It crushed me. ”I’m sorry but your baby is dead,” are words I’ll never be able to unhear. And because of these words, I had no words. For what felt like weeks, I spoke only in tears as they streamed down my cheeks. But I know it couldn’t have been that long. Because...

Keep Reading