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I lost my temper this morning.⁣ ⁣ We were runn

I lost my temper this morning.⁣
⁣
We were running late.⁣
⁣
I was trying to frantically shove tissue paper in the teacher appreciation gifts, and nobody was listening to me.⁣
⁣
So I yelled.⁣
⁣
And threw things.⁣
⁣
And said some things I regret.⁣
⁣
I took all my stress and pent-up anxiety out on my kids, particularly my son.⁣
⁣
He yelled back at me.⁣
⁣
So I yelled some more.⁣
⁣
And it wasn’t until I was tossing Uncrustables into lunch boxes while trying to fix my daughter’s favorite bow that I looked over at him on the couch.⁣
⁣
He was crying.⁣
⁣
I dropped everything, walked over, and pulled him into my lap.⁣
⁣
I told him I was sorry for yelling and saying hurtful things, and explained I was just tired and stressed out and not having a very good day, but I need him to listen when I ask him to do something.⁣
⁣
He said he accepted my apology, and he would try harder to listen, but then he said something that almost knocked me out.⁣
⁣
He said, “But Mommy, can you try to listen to me, too?”⁣
⁣
He explained that he was also having a bad morning, didn’t get enough sleep, and was feeling overwhelmed.⁣
⁣
He told me he tried to say something during breakfast, but I was so flustered and on a complete rampage, I didn’t hear him.⁣
⁣
I was blown away.⁣
⁣
I realized sometimes I get so lost in my own stress, anxiety, depression, and frustration that I forget my kids can have those big, scary feelings, too.⁣
⁣
And just how I seek validation, grace, and acceptance when I’m struggling with my own mental health, I need to give it to them when they need it as well.⁣
⁣
We both lost our tempers this morning.⁣
⁣
We both yelled. We both said some things we regret.⁣
⁣
And that’s OK.⁣
⁣
We also both apologized. We listened to each other.⁣
⁣
I smothered him in kisses and told him that even when I’m having a bad day, I still love him more than words could say.⁣
⁣
And I know he loves me too.⁣
⁣
When I dropped him off at school this morning, he turned around, smiled, and waved at me like he does every day.⁣
⁣
Reminding me that despite all the times when I feel like I’m getting everything wrong, he’s one thing I can say I’ve gotten so right.⁣
⁣
Written by @the_hotmess_supermom

❤️🙌

My sister bought him this backpack for his 2nd bir

My sister bought him this backpack for his 2nd birthday.

It has a frog on the front. Its eyes sit above the fly shaped zipper—and when he puts it on his back, I’m sure that frog is smiling at me.

I love his backpack. My guy does too.

It stayed in his closet for a while. He was too little; it was too big.

Eventually, we filled it with crayons and Play-Doh and other small trinkets for church and his sisters’ school activities.

He lugged it through pews and gymnasiums, soccer fields and basketball gyms.

And when his first year of preschool began, we dumped out old toys and broken crayons and filled that backpack with a water bottle, pencils, and an extra pair of pants (just in case).

The preschool teachers recommended a bigger backpack for his 2nd year of Pre-K. “For all the art projects,” they said. But my guy wanted to keep his frog for another year—I did, too.

His backpack was heavier this fall. Each day we’d look through it and pull out new treasures.

Homework with his name written on the front.
Library books with trucks and dinosaurs and faraway galaxies he wanted to explore.
Pine cones and rocks he discovered at recess.
And every so often, a special craft.

“I made it for you, Mom,” he’d show me proudly. “Do you love it?”

Always.

He’ll put on his backpack for the last time this week. My sweet boy, my baby, my last-born, will finish preschool on Thursday.

“I’ll need a bigger backpack for kindergarten,” he tells me.

He’s right.

I asked him if he’ll miss it.

He thinks he might. I know I will.

So, it’s goodbye Mr. Frog.

Goodbye sticky kisses.

Goodbye preschool teachers.

Goodbye story time on the colorful rug.

Goodbye morning drop-off hugs.

Goodbye Spider-Man water bottle.

Goodbye sticks and rocks and pine cones.

Goodbye my baby.

He’ll be a big kid soon. Kindergarten will start in a blink. But I’ll always remember that little boy, his smiling frog backpack, and the little years we loved so much together.
✍️ @leslielmeans (founder of Her View From Home)

Throughout the pregnancy after loss journey, there

Throughout the pregnancy after loss journey, there is a constant inner battle of wanting to over document your pregnancy and the anxiety of wondering if this bump pic will be your last.⁣
⁣
This would be my last bump pic before our second son made his entrance.⁣
⁣
This is the first time we experienced the beginning of the third trimester.⁣
⁣
This is the first time we experienced the pregnancy waddle.⁣
⁣
This is the first time we experienced me losing the site of my toes.⁣
⁣
This is the first time we experienced taking maternity photos, even though it was with IVs and outside of the hospital.⁣
⁣
While we were grateful to experience and get to the third trimester, what this didn’t mean to us yet was survival and we still grieved the experiences we didn’t get to have.⁣
⁣
Pregnancy after loss changes the entire pregnancy journey.⁣
⁣
It’s hard to find hope, even if you want to.⁣
⁣
It’s hard to find joy, even if you want to.⁣
⁣
Yet under all of the emotions, there is love.⁣
⁣
Love for your child in heaven and love for the child in your beautiful belly.⁣
⁣
Love is what keeps us going.⁣
⁣
This is Pregnancy After Loss.⁣
⁣
Written by @carterscause

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