When my four kids were in diapers and Pull-Ups, I needed mom friends to sit with me in survival mode and talk about the mundane and messy stuff of motherhood. Friends who understood the gift of a caramel macchiato at the doorstep when I didn’t have makeup or a bra on. Friends I could tell, “I blew it today. What about you?”

This season of friendship was about survivaltogether.

When my kids were toddling around our wood floors, exploring every cupboard breaking the locks my husband and I spent hours babyproofing, I needed friends willing to pack up their Suburban and drive to the mall or a McDonald’s or Chick-fil-A PlayPlace to burn off steam. I needed friends who understood exhaustion, bed wetting, night terrors, potty training, sickness, constant discipline, sleep deprivation, and more. 

This season of friendship was about relating through outingstogether.

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When my kids started preschool, I needed friends to help with carpool and shuffling kids around to Mother’s Day Out, MOPS outings, and doctor’s appointments. I was happy to do the same for them. I needed mom friends for adult conversation and shared experiences through planned playdates. 

This season of friendship was about taking advantage of those fast, kid-free hourstogether. 

Now, my kids dress themselves (no more fights over putting on socks and shoes!) and are walking the halls of their elementary school. I never thought the day would come. Yet, it’s here, and I love it. 

The house is quiet when they’re gone, and while I substitute at their school and write from home, I still have to be intentional with friendships. So far, it’s looked like inviting friends for coffee, starting a Bible study, planning a weekend trip with our kids, going to conferences, or getting our husbands together for a dinner date.

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Some days, it’s just a quick text to my friend that says, I’m praying for you and thinking about you, friend. Or sending a video chat through Marco Polo for her to see my disheveled hair, hormonal acne, and piles of laundry on the couch. 

Even though motherhood progresses, not much has changed on the relational side for me. I still have to reach out and show my group I value them, and that requires prioritizing time spent together. I still need my friends like I did when my kids were babies. I desire to know more about them and for them to know more of who I am.

This current season of friendship is about intentionality—together. 

The beauty in the friendships God’s given me each new season of motherhood is He’s known exactly what I needed even when I didn’t. He’s brought moms and women of all ages to me, and I’ll treasure them forever. 

RELATED: Make Room For Mom Friends in Your Life—You Need Them More Than You Know

He’s proved His faithfulness even when I was drowning in despair.

As my family grows older and spring soon turns to summer, I know He’ll continue providing the friendships I need right where I’m at.

Samantha Krieger

Samantha Krieger is a pastor's wife and mom to four children, 11 and under. She's the author of Quiet Time: A 30-day Devotional Retreat for Moms in the Trenches. She writes from rural Colorado and enjoys connecting with readers on her personal blogFacebook and Instagram.