This month is National Adoption Month. Its purpose is to raise awareness for the hundreds of thousands of kids waiting for a family in foster care. If foster care or adoption has been on your heart, I definitely encourage you to learn more and prayerfully consider opening up your homes to those who need a family to love them and a home to call their own.
Four years ago on National Adoption Day, we walked into the courthouse with a sweet 8 month old baby boy who we loved like our own. But it wasn’t until we walked out of the courthouse that day that he was legally our son. With a bang of the gavel, he had become our son in every sense of the word. It was truly a happy day at the courthouse. We were among dozens of families who were there to celebrate adoption. The courthouse was decorated with balloons & beanie babies. There was cake, cookies and punch. It was a neat experience to be there finalizing our son’s adoption with so many other families who have traveled the road to adoption and were doing the same with their families. Our son had been with us since he was 4 days old, but some of these kids had been in and out of foster care for years. It was truly a blessing for them to have a forever family.
What I want you to know about adoption is that it can be a beautiful thing; but before the beauty comes there is heartache, loss, brokenness and raw emotion. Adoption should be and is about the kids- the adoptees. It’s about finding families for children; not about finding babies for families.
Our family has been blessed beyond our wildest dreams because of adoption. We have our beautiful children because of adoption. But we didn’t just gain a son and a daughter, we gained their birth families. The families who loved them first.
Adoption isn’t easy. As an adoptive family, I know it wasn’t easy for us… the paperwork, doctor appointments, background checks and home visits weren’t too bad. But what I found challenging was the unknown. Not knowing when or if we were ever going to bring home a baby. Ultimately, we had to be okay with that. Adoption isn’t about us.
Clearly adoption is not easy for the parents who love their kids so much they choose to give them another family with hopes of a better life. We saw moms say good-bye to their babies. Those gut-wrenching moments will be forever etched my mind. The raw emotions; the tears, screaming out in agony, the hurt.
A child grows in their mother’s womb for 9 months and then suddenly they’re taken from the only mother they knew. That’s trauma and certainly not easy.
When we can overcome our own feelings and come together for the sake of a child – THAT is when adoption becomes a beautiful thing. As an adoptive family, it might be easier to pretend that our kids don’t have other moms and dads. As birth parents, it might be easier to forget rather than having the constant reminders of what could have been… But we all love our kids and we know adoption is about them; so we get over ourselves and do what is best for OUR babies.
I can tell you with certainty that our kids are worth it all; they bring so much happiness & joy to all of us.
These are some of the faces of adoption…
Yup, adoption can be beautiful.