First comes love,
then comes marriage,
then comes a baby in the baby carriage.
Remember that old nursery rhyme? I can still hear it playing in my head. Growing up, I had always assumed that would be my story.
The love and marriage part certainly happened for me in an amazing, storybook ending kind of way. However, the baby in the baby carriage didn’t come as quickly for my husband and me.
As a few years passed, we began to feel a little restless and disheartened. However, God opened up His perfect plan for our family by leading us to adoption.
While I believed adoption was important, it had never really been on my radar for us. After all, it sounded complicated, expensive, and like it would take a long time. We weren’t ready for something like that. Or were we?
Let’s just say the emotional struggle was certainly there as we decided what to do. However, God made our path clear, and we trusted his plans for us. We couldn’t wait to be parents!
Adoption is beautiful but hard at the same time. You see, there is a birth mother out there who made a sacrificial choice to allow us to raise her child because she feels ill-equipped to do it herself. I do not take that precious gift lightly.
While we waited for our child, here’s what we learned:
1. A little complication is OK
One thing that we learned about adoption is that it takes time and you have to jump through quite a few hoops. However, we wholeheartedly now realize that anything worth having is worth working toward and waiting for.
Our adoption journey took two years. To say the wait was worth it is an immense understatement. We have a precious daughter who was prayed for and placed in our home at the exact right time for the Lord’s glory and our blessing.
2. The expense is doable
My husband and I were debt-free when we began the adoption process. However, we had several savings goals lined up. Looking at our budget, the numbers just didn’t make sense. How would we afford this private adoption?
Then we were reminded of the scripture that says God’s ways and thoughts are higher than ours. He worked out all the details in a way that was more than we could have asked or imagined.
As we began to research adoption agencies, we kept our prayerful, debt-free goal in mind. Depending on several factors, an adoption can range from $20,000 to $50,000. We had to revamp and refocus both our budget and goals in order to avoid debt.
We made these changes to afford our adoption:
- We nipped and tucked our budget in order to save more money.
- Some of our goals were simply pushed off to free up money for the baby.
- I began a freelance writing business which brought in extra money.
- Our vacations largely consisted of trips to visit family.
Where this is a will, there is a way. I’m so thankful we had the faith and a willingness to work hard in order to afford our adoption because it has been a blessing for our family.
3. The blessing of our child was worth the wait
We raced through the application process with our adoption agency and then the real wait began. During that time, we prayed, read parenting books, and even began to stock up on things like diapers. Just like there is a “nesting” period with a pregnancy, I took that timeframe of waiting to prepare for our little one.
I’m blessed that the baby carriage I mentioned earlier is no longer empty in our household. The day we got “the call” is so precious to me. We became instant parents as we prayed, praised, and cried happy tears. The Lord had blessed us and answered our many prayers.
Our verse during the adoption process was the promise that awaited us in 1 Samuel 1:27 which says, “I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him.” Adoption may take time, but the blessing far outweighs any of those “labor pains” you experience along the way.