When it all started, I honestly didn’t think I was built to mother through it.
I didn’t think I was built to comfort these bright eyes full of innocence through something that, for me, seems so incredibly uncomfortable.
That I’d be teaching my son how to tie his shoes and how to properly wear a mask to cover his sweet little face simultaneously.
That I’d carry a baby in my belly and then in my hands while sanitizing those same hands like my life (and his) depends on it.
That I would have to answer a thousand questions from my littles that even I don’t fully understand on a daily basis.
That I’d have to teach my kids to sit far apart from other kids instead of enjoying the comfort of closeness, high-fives, and hugs.
That they would grow up during a time where it seems safer to sit inside and watch other kids play outside than to actually go outside.
That my daughter would ask over and over again why we can’t go to the grocery store as a family.
That everyone having their heads down looking at phones would be replaced with everyone looking down at lines and arrows on the grocery store floors so they know where to properly exit and enter each aisle.
That I would have to explain why they can’t go to parks and play places and spaces that are really the carefree fun places of being a kid.
That “carefree” would be replaced with so many cares and “be careful” and we can’t ever let you get sick.
My head spins.
I have never lived through a global pandemic and here I am teaching all three of them how to do it while I learn how to do it simultaneously
We are all learning how and it has made our already extra-long parenting to-do lists extra long.
I don’t want my children to live in fear in a world that often feels scary and uncertain, where what they can and cannot do changes all so quickly.
I don’t want them to be riddled with anxiety about what could possibly happen to them when they haven’t even yet realized their full potential.
I want them to be kids because they have their whole life to be everything else but I sort of feel like mothering them through this season has them growing up in fast-forward.
They are constantly asking adult questions. They are keenly aware of what is going on around them.
Even though I don’t have all the answers for myself or for them, I take comfort in knowing God does.
So as I teach them to sanitize and mask up I have been teaching them how to pray and look up.
That their sweet and innocent little hearts will find comfort in knowing that they were built to grow up during this pandemic.
And that their mama was built to mother them through it.