Sometimes it’s easy to take you for granted. Sometimes it’s easy to put my focus on other people, things to get done, places to go. Sometimes it’s easy to assume that you’ll always be there.

But sometimes I need to make you a priority. I need to thank you for your hard work, your dedication to me and the kids, your selflessness. I need to ask how your day was, take an investment in your interests, and be more considerate of your needs.

The hustle and bustle of everyday life gets in the way and is an easy excuse.

Honestly, sometimes I don’t know how to be a wife anymore.

My number one role right now is mom, and it can be tough to squeeze in other identities. The one-on-one time together is important—a necessity—but it’s hard and doesn’t feel as natural as it once did.

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We have built an amazing life together. Thirteen years ago today, you took me out for the first time. We had just met the night before, and yet you knew you loved me by the end of our first date. We sat in your car for an hour and a half getting to know one another while we waited for a table at a restaurant I was dying to go to. You were ready to make me your girlfriend before I knew what I wanted. You planned a perfect proposal the following Easter, and I’ll always remember finding my ring at the bottom of an Easter basket. 

Over the years you’ve always followed your dreams and aspirations, and you’ve encouraged me to do the same.

You’ve taken on the roles of husband, father, and provider.

We’ve weathered ups and downs—moves, health concerns, jobs, job losses, pets, pet losses, and two wonderful children. We are a great team, and I want that for us always.

Remember, a few weeks ago on vacation, you asked what was weighing so heavily on my mind? It was this.

How can I begin to embrace my role as a wife again and give you what you deserve?

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Well, I’m here to say, I’m going to try. It will take time and patience for both of us, but we both deserve it. I’m going to ask about your day. I’m going to consider your views and feelings more and try to begin knocking down the wall that I always have to be right. I’m going to try to treat you more like an equal than as another child. I’m going to try to lighten up.

I’m going to try. I’m ready to try.