So God Made a Mother is Here! 🎉

Being a mom is hard. I’m not sure if this is a widely talked about subject, because everyone I see makes it look so dang easy. I don’t know about you, but sometimes it feels impossible. I am constantly wondering if what I am doing is “right” or “safe.” Constantly wondering if I am being a “good mom.” Being a mom in any day was hard I am sure, but as a young mom in 2017, I would argue it is only getting harder. I think as moms we are putting more and more pressure on ourselves to be a “good mom.” We are comparing what we see others doing to what we think we should or should not be doing. We are getting input from so many different sources regarding our parenting that it is hard to not question if you are doing it “right.”

But what really makes a good mom?

Is it the beautiful photos of your children smiling so perfectly on your Instagram? All of your picture perfect moments shared and those photos of your kids throwing spaghetti erased? The extravagant birthday party you spend your savings on, just so you can show others how great it was? Are you throwing that party for your child or for your pinterest photos? Is being a good mom making sure our kids have the cutest clothes, their hair is done right, our home decor is pinterest perfect? Are you posting photos in hopes that one of them has a shot at getting as much attention as some of the other photos moms with thousands of followers are posting? Do you spank your child? Do you vaccinate? Do you use the word no? Do you let your child self sooth? Do you co-sleep? The list goes on and on. Everybody has an opinion and you will get a different one everywhere you look. You might be judged because your opinion and parenting style differs from someone around you. When you post a photo of your child doing something, you have a 50% chance someone is going to comment negatively on it. Pinterest, blogs, Instagram, etc… Social Media everywhere has raised the expectations of what makes a “good mom.” Do you ever see the messy home photos? The dirty laundry on the bed photographed? The child covered in food screaming on someone’s Instagram? No, you only see the good. I have had a couple people (that I don’t know, and that don’t know me) tell us how perfect our lives are, and there are times when I want to say, “If you only knew our story…” Everyone has a story, and everyone has moments during the day we would never want photographed. Don’t let our photos of Carter smiling fool you, he is generally a very happy baby but we have meltdowns, fits, and moments of complete despair also. 

Matt usually will give him his dinner food (if he gets home in time from work to see him before I put him down), and this night he happened to be cranky. If Matt wouldn’t spoon the food immediately, despair would happen. We have moments like this, but would I ever randomly post them on Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest, etc ? Probably not, but who knows? I think he is adorable even with this face. This is real life.

 So what makes a “good mom?” I have no idea. I wish I did, but unfortunately the answer to this question probably differs on who you ask. That would make this motherhood thing a whole lot less stressful if someone could just give me a manual containing step-by-step instructions. I am still trying to figure it out, and something tells me I won’t know everything until my kids have kids… and by then, everything will have changed anyways. But I do know this; your kids don’t care if your Instagram feed is perfect, their birthday party compares to those on pinterest, or if their shirt came from a fancy organic boutique. The simple truth is that they desire love. They desire a mother who makes them feel like the most loved kid in the entire world. A mom who fights, gives, works, and loves even when her children are driving her insane. A mom who wakes up every morning with a renewed spirit and open heart. Real life is messy and it is hard at times. There might be times when it feels like you are failing compared to other moms out there, but you’re not. The pressure to be perfect is high, but the reality is you don’t need to be perfect; you need to stop comparing and start reflecting. Did I give my children the best mother they needed today? Did I meet all of their basic needs? Did I kiss them goodnight? Did I make sure they knew they were loved? I guarantee you, when they reflect back on their childhood, they are going to remember the moments you spent time loving on them and spending time with them. So put down that phone, get off Instagram and instead of looking at other moms with their kids, go and play with yours. Build memories and write those memories down, they will go by so fast. In their eyes, you are the best mother out there because you are their mother. Nobody else was given that job, God made you this child’s mother for a reason. So trust that he knows what he is doing, and have faith in yourself that you do too.

This was originally published at
So God Made a Mother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our new book, SO GOD MADE A MOTHER available now!

Order Now

Tayler DiGiacomo

Tayler is a Christian saved by grace, a wife to her high school sweetheart, and mama to two in heaven and two on earth. She spends her days working from home, taking care of her two little ones, and blogging about marriage, motherhood, and her families adventures at: 
She loves connecting with other Christian women who are just trying to be the best mother and wife they can be.

Dear Teachers, Thank You Will Never Be Enough

In: Kids, Living
Kids hugging teacher

Growing up a teacher’s daughter has given me a lifetime of appreciation for educators. Of course, it’s true; I may be biased. I’ve been fortunate to have learned and been guided by many outstanding teachers, including my mother and grandmother, who passed those legacy skills onto my daughter, who strongly feels teaching is her calling. But if you’ve had your eyes and ears open in recent years, you, too, probably feel deep gratitude for the angels among us who work in the school system. So, as the school year ends, and on behalf of parents, grandparents, and anyone who loves...

Keep Reading

Before You, Boy, I Never Knew

In: Kids, Motherhood
Three boys playing in creek, color photo

Before you, boy, I never knew that little boys could get so dirty. Play so rough. Climb so high. Assess your risks. Make me hold my breath. Messes everywhere.   Before you, boy, I never knew how much my lap will make room for you. My arms will stretch to swallow you up in endless hugs and just hold you close. And love you to the moon and back. And back again. Snuggling and snuggling.  RELATED: I Met a Boy and He Changed Everything Before you, boy, I never knew that there would be so much wrestling. And superheroes, and far-off...

Keep Reading

It Hurts Seeing My Kid as a B-List Friend

In: Friendship, Kids, Teen
Teen girl sitting alone on a dock

Kids everywhere are celebrating, or will be celebrating soon. They will be playing outside, enjoying warm summer days, bike rides with friends, and maybe even sleepovers. It’s summer—it’s fun, right? Sure, it is. And sometimes it isn’t. Sometimes it isn’t fun for the kids you least expect it from. We have that issue, and I knew it was building for the past few weeks with our teenage daughter. She was moody (moodier than normal). Short tempered. Obviously frustrated, but not ready to talk about it. But it was when she came home on the last day of school, in tears,...

Keep Reading

Dear Hunter’s Mom, What I Really Want to Say

In: Kids, Motherhood
Mother holding toddler boy, color photo

Hi, I’m Krystal. I’ve wanted to say that every Tuesday and Thursday when I see you in the preschool hallway. I don’t know why I never say it. It might be because I’m afraid to. Maybe you just want to get the drop-off over with and get out of there. I get it. Hunter is crying . . . hard. People are looking . . . they always look. Your face is flushed, your jacket twisted. You are caught between trying to do what you are supposed to do and what you want to do. I can tell. I know...

Keep Reading

5 Money Tips to Set Your Kids Up for a Strong Financial Future

In: Grown Children, Kids, Motherhood, Teen
Father putting quarters in child's hand

As parents, we want to see our children become independent, but the transition to financial independence has unique challenges. I get it. I have three children of my own, and each of them deals with money differently. The transition can be especially difficult if you are a family that doesn’t talk openly about money. Regardless of whether money has been an open topic in the past, as your high school graduate moves on to the next chapter in their life, it’s important to help them start thinking about their financial future. College tuition, rent, and other expenses can be overwhelming...

Keep Reading

Don’t Tell an Anxious Child to Calm Down—Help Them Do It

In: Kids, Motherhood, Teen, Tween
Child sitting against a wall with head in hands

She comes to me with teary eyes, a shaky voice, and stomping feet, “This is dumb! Everything is terrible! I’m never going to school again!” My 13-year-old daughter is prone to drama. It doesn’t take much for her to fly off the handle these days. One minute she’s happily crafting at the table and the next moment her mood has made such a drastic change I have whiplash from it. My first response is to say the easiest—and least helpful—words, “Just calm down.” But I know from my own experience that those words have never helped anyone just calm down....

Keep Reading

I’m Raising a Child Who Only Goes Full Speed

In: Kids, Motherhood
Little girl in yellow dress and sunglasses, color photo

If you’ve ever spent more than five minutes with my daughter, you will quickly see that she is always at a 10. Calm is not in her vocabulary or her existence in any form. From the moment her eyes open, she is on the move. Mentally, physically, all of it. Bedtime is when she shares her deepest thoughts and asks the kinds of questions no parent wants to deal with at the end of the day. And then, after what feels like hours of questions and songs, she’s on the fast track to dreamland and not even an earthquake could...

Keep Reading

I’m Still a Boy Mom Even Though I Had Girl

In: Kids, Motherhood
Mom with son and daughter laughing outside

I am a boy mom. I’ve lovingly held that title since 2014 when my first son joined our family. My second and third children were also boys, which secured my moniker. Boys are great! The rough and rowdy energy to play in the dirt, climb trees, and make engine noises for every moving thing fits my personality. I love being a boy mom!  For six and a half years, I was only a boy mom. But when other parents talked about ponies and princesses, I didn’t feel left out. Trucks and dirt filled my heart so there was no room...

Keep Reading

Admitting Your Child Needs More Help than You Can Give Is Brave

In: Kids, Motherhood, Teen, Tween
Young woman looking out rainy window

It had been nearly a year, and despite my best efforts and constant prayers, the tumultuous relationship with my daughter continued to be on a downward spiral.  I never knew what side of her I would get, some days she was the little girl I had always known, but most days she was a stranger. There were days at a time she refused to get out of bed, filled with little energy she was irritable, angry, and hostile. Followed by days at a time when she wouldn’t sleep, conversations with her were jumbled, and she spoke too quickly to keep up. She...

Keep Reading

Dear Kindergartner, This Is Just the Beginning

In: Kids, Motherhood
Little girl with backpack, color photo

To my future kindergartner, I can’t seem to wrap my head around the fact that I really just wrote those words. It’s hard to grasp that your last day of walking out our door and into your little Pre-K class is coming faster than we think. But it’s almost here and there are a few things I need you to know even if you don’t fully understand them. Things that go further than ABCs and snack time. Know that you are brave. You are probably one of the bravest humans I have ever met. Your fearlessness is often the leading...

Keep Reading