Let’s talk about Mother’s Day. That day has changed for me since becoming a mom. It’s still about my mom who has been an awesome mom and dare I say, an even better grandma! (Happy Mother’s Day, Mom!). My kids do a good job making me feel special, loved and appreciated on Mother’s Day and pretty much every other day throughout the year. But it’s a little bit different that I’m now on the receiving end of the homemade cards. It’s sweeter and more memorable now that I’m a mom and get to be celebrated. Let’s not forget the gifts. The kids are always so excited to show me what they picked out. Last year, it was a pink Nerf gun. I know you’re jealous!

With Mother’s Day quickly approaching, I can’t help but feel a little emotional. I am so incredibly blessed to be mom to three beautiful children. They are my everything. I’ve always wanted to be mom; I feel like it’s what I’ve been called to do. At a young age I learned that biological kids wouldn’t be a wise option for me. I didn’t let that stop my dreams of being mom come true. Early on in our marriage, my husband and I started the adoption process. Nine months to the day we first contacted our adoption agency, we got the call that we were chosen to bring home a sweet baby boy! Eventually, we adopted two more times giving our son, not one, but two little sisters. I still have to pinch myself!

I think about my kids’ first moms a lot, but especially on Mother’s Day. Without those women, I would not be a mom; a title I cherish. I wasn’t there when my kids took their first breath, cried their first tear or gave their first snuggle. I never felt them kicking in my pregnant belly. My voice wasn’t the one they recognized. They don’t share my genes. I wasn’t the first one to hold them. I missed a lot of firsts. But in my place, there was someone else there loving them. Despite missing out on some firsts, I’m still their mom. But I’m not their only mom. They were each born to a different mom. A mom (for various reasons) who wasn’t quite ready and able to raise them. But still very much a mom; a title I cherish so much, that I won’t dare take it away from another mom.

I know this weekend will be an emotional one for them. They miss their babies. The ones I’m lucky enough to tuck into bed at night and share a goodnight kiss with. The ones who run to me when they need a hug. The ones who made my dreams come true. One of these moms will also be missing her mom, who sadly passed away when our daughter was just 6 months old. One of them is raising her other kids, but I’m positive she’ll be thinking about the baby she placed for adoption and probably wishing they could all be together. My heart hurts for these moms; these women that I have grown to love. Without them, I wouldn’t be celebrated on Mother’s Day and I think they deserve to be celebrated and recognized too.

In my eyes, these women are very much moms… they gave our kids a chance at life. They loved them from the beginning. And they still do. They might not be there for the daily grind but they play an important role in our kids’ lives; just like I do. Happy Mother’s Day to all of us!

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Alissa Kay

Alissa was born and raised in the Midwest and currently calls Wisconsin home. She's happily married to her college sweetheart and she's living out her dreams of being a stay-at-home mom. Although, let's be real, she's hardly ever home. She's the mom to 3 kids who all came to her via adoption. A boy (8) and 2 girls (6 and almost 4!). The kids keep her plenty busy, but when she has free time she enjoys a night out with friends or curling up with a good book.