I am with you, fellow mama.
I can relate to where your mind is as you plop down onto a couch at 9:47pm after FINALLY getting the last child to stop escaping his room.
I know your first instinct is to stand right back up off the cushions. There are so many things to do that you didn’t get done that day because the baby didn’t nap. You desperately want to just SIT and be mindless and allow your body to be still for the first time since right before your toddler smacked you across the face to wake you up an hour early that morning.
But your always-moving mind keeps pushing you to get back up.
“The house is quiet. Now’s the time to get stuff done. You will already be behind tomorrow if you don’t do it now,” it tells you.
That voice uses it’s invisible hands to force you to get up and clean the countertops and fold laundry on the floor as you wonder if this is your life now. Taking care of children all day and taking care of a house all night, before you wake up and do it all over again in the morning.
Or maybe . . .
Maybe one night you DO decide to sit down.
Maybe you give yourself permission to let go of “all the things” and be still. But because stillness feels uncomfortable in your busy world, you grab your phone to keep your mind’s need for activity moving.
You start scrolling your social media feed of highlight reels of other moms’ days. The ice cream cones with which she surprised her kids or the vacation she is on with her family or the girls night she planned.
You’re reminded how much your life has changed that you are that you are home on a Friday night doing the same thing you do every other week night. And you barely looked your kids in the eye that day let alone did a surprise ice cream outing. You have no money in the bank for a babysitter let alone a vacation.
Or maybe . . .
Maybe one night you fall asleep while lying in bed with your toddler because your body has finally stopped long enough to have you finally notice how exhausted you are.
You wake up at 3:30 a.m. confused and worried that you missed an alarm. You get your bearings, kiss your baby, then head to your bedroom. You have a hard time falling back asleep and you lay awake feeling guilty for all of the things you could have gotten done had you not fallen asleep. So you scroll your phone or maybe even head downstairs to get things done in the middle of the night.
Yes, I see you, mama. I have been there with you battling a mind that is always telling you that you need to DO more. To BE more.
A mind that doesn’t know how to find stillness at the end of a long day. A mind that can’t stop telling you that you’re not doing a good enough job. A mind that is always reminding you that you have to “keep up” when all you want to do is “slow down”.
But tonight, friend . . . I encourage you to fight back.
When it tells you that you need to get up from the couch and do housework . . . tell it you’re not listening today . . . and close your eyes to find enough silence that you can hear your true inner voice’s message that, while the day was busy, YOU did your best. And your best is enough. And you deserve to rest.
When it’s trying to make you scroll your phone . . . tell it you’re not listening today . . . and grab a book about positivity. Talk to your spouse. Call a friend. Journal the things that make you most grateful. Fill your soul.
When it is trying to guilt you that you chose sleep over chores . . . tell it you’re not listening today . . . and know that resting your body is fueling your spirit to have more patience, clarity and gratitude for whatever the next day has in store.
When it is trying to tell you that you are anything less than you are, tell it you’re not listening today . . . and that you won’t be listening tomorrow, either.
Because you know everything you are . . . is more than enough.
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