Once we enter motherhood, there is an innate force that begins to stir in our hearts. It propels us to advocate for our children whenever and however they need it, and it is a force to reckon with. Some kids may require more advocacy than others at different times in their lives, but at some point, they all need a loud champion who is not afraid to shout their worth or fight alongside them. That’s when we really shine because when the going gets tough, a mom gets tougher.
But even the strongest of us eventually experience being burned out. Along the way, the trivial details of our day-to-day lives can blur our vision, and we may lose sight of what was initially important—the catalyst for our advocacy: our kid’s happiness. So, what happens when the fire that was previously burning so bright on our torch starts to dim, and we can no longer see the road ahead? How do we go about looking for that flame to light our way? And if we are able to find it, how do we reignite the drive that propelled us on our journey?
During a marathon, the most athletic runners will require a cup of water along the trek to the finish line. A car can travel the country, but it will have to stop for fuel or electricity to do so. Even Superman recharged with the sun to amplify his superpowers. A mother can juggle so many things, but when raising little humans, we need to regroup every so often. After all, we are only human ourselves. But how do we go about doing this? It’s easy to say you want a spa day or a night out with friends and these are certainly valuable, but sometimes we should dig deeper.
As a mother of a child with special needs, I share snippets of our life with others in the hope that the world gets to see his genuine worth. But there have been times when I begin to lose sight of why I advocate, or a heavy tiredness slows me down. This is when reflecting and taking a break has its weight in gold.
If I can muster the strength, I try to realize that although the motherhood switch can never be turned off, the volume at which it’s set can be lowered. It does not always have to be blasted. This awareness helps me meditate on the faults I should work on, but it also allows me to give credit where credit is due. Then, I begin to look at my kids and go back to the past, especially during the hard trials. I attempt to place myself in my old shoes in order to appreciate the strides my family and I have made, no matter the magnitude. Now and again, it’s the small steps over time that make us realize just how far we have come when we are thinking about our journey.
Yet, when we can find the energy and passion to continue advocating, no matter how hopeful we are, there will be more trials in the future. There will be tough obstacles to get through and the process of doubting our motherly capabilities will resurface when we lose sight of the drive once more. It’s the inevitable cloudy skies that make up our lives.
The truth is that we may not always find the strength, energy, or motivation we were hoping for, or that we once felt. But if we can appreciate the victories—big and small—and remember the most important thing is our kid’s happiness, then perhaps that is all we need to reignite the superpowers that come with motherhood . . . at least until the next spa day comes.