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I’m Learning To Control My Temper For My Child’s Sake

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By Courtney Omell

Frustrated mom on couch — GaudiLab/Shutterstock.com

My biggest struggle as a new mom has been learning to control my temper. And you know what? I fail. A lot. Cutting my squirming, screaming daughter’s nails can send me into a fit, flying out of the room in a huff only half-finished. I am not proud of this. In fact, it is one of the most embarrassing things I’ve had to admit as a mother. I was terrified to write this post but thought if I could make one other mother feel less alone in this struggle, then it would be worth it.

RELATED: I’m a Yelling Mom But Here’s How I Stop

I see moms with infinite amounts of patience, and I wish so badly to be like them. I know they reach their limits sometimes, too, and that nobody is perfect, but I also know my fuse is shorter than a lot of other moms. Sometimes it’s a pile of dishes my husband left in the sink. Other times it’s a whole bowl of homemade food being thrown on the floor.

It’s very rarely worth my anger and almost always something I should have shrugged off.

The truth is, I’ve never been a calm person. My emotions run hot and I boil over fast—and only after I’ve lost it, can I seem to find calm. This is something I’ve been working on in my first year as a mother. And it’s been really hard. I feel an enormous sense of guilt when my daughter sees me lose my cool. Will she feel like this exasperation is her fault? Will she be scared of me?

RELATED: Dear Kids, I’m Sorry I Yelled But I’m Just So Tired

I started giving myself a goal as a way to handle my outbursts: How many days can I go without losing my temper in front of her?

When I feel myself losing my cool, I think about how many days I’ve stayed calm and whether or not the current situation is worth ruining my streak.

Sometimes that alone is enough to make me shrug off whatever was about to set me off. Other times, I have to leave the room. If I know I need to blow off steam, I go shed a few angry tears in the bathroom and then come back and try again.

And sometimes I fail completely. And then I start over. Back to day one.

RELATED: I Failed as a Mom Today and I May Fail Again Tomorrow, But I’ll Keep on Trying

I have no solution for this. It’s my biggest flaw, and I’m ashamed of it. But I do know that all I can do is keep trying. No matter how many times I have to start over, I will keep trying. My daughter deserves the best version of me, and I deserve to focus on my strengths as a mother.

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Courtney Omell

Courtney Omell is a Michigan native living in Pennsylvania with her husband, daughters, and two rescue pups. She loves to cook for her food blog and could eat mac and cheese every day of the week. You can follow her on Instagram for pics of food, dogs, and her two beautiful girls.

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I’m Learning To Control My Temper For My Child’s Sake

RELATED: I’m a Yelling Mom But Here’s How I Stop

It’s very rarely worth my anger and almost always something I should have shrugged off.

RELATED: Dear Kids, I’m Sorry I Yelled But I’m Just So Tired

When I feel myself losing my cool, I think about how many days I’ve stayed calm and whether or not the current situation is worth ruining my streak.

RELATED: I Failed as a Mom Today and I May Fail Again Tomorrow, But I’ll Keep on Trying

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Courtney Omell

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Mom Showed Us Love that Lasts

This Is How I’m Raising My Sensitive Son

Get It Now

So God Made a Mother

I’m Learning To Control My Temper For My Child’s Sake

It’s very rarely worth my anger and almost always something I should have shrugged off.

When I feel myself losing my cool, I think about how many days I’ve stayed calm and whether or not the current situation is worth ruining my streak.

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

I Finally Admitted I Didn’t Want To Be a SAHM Anymore

I’m Not Really Sure How To Do This Teenager Thing

Why Don’t We Talk About Jonah’s Mother?

To the Mom Worrying She’s Not Doing Enough This Summer

Your Worth As a Mother Is Not Defined By How You Feed Your Baby

A Mother’s Love Doesn’t End When Her Kids Move Out

The Hardest Part of Divorce Is Being Away from My Kids

I May Let Go of the Baby Things, but I’ll Hold the Memories Forever

Mom Showed Us Love that Lasts

This Is How I’m Raising My Sensitive Son

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