A Gift for Mom! 🤍

I Never Wanted My Mother-in-Law’s Curio Cabinet

4 Minute Read

By Jacqueline Miller

Curio cabinet — Image via Jacqueline Miller

I hate stereotypical mother-in-law jokes and memes because my husband’s mom was one of my favorite people in this world. Always the life of the party, she quickly embraced me as part of her family, warmly sharing her traditions, recipes, and games.

Normally, she was an excellent gift giver—for example, she noticed I traveled with toiletries in random baggies, so for my birthday she got me a quality, hang-up travel kit that’s lasted more than a decade, and she even filled it with fun-sized versions of my favorite products.

Nevertheless, in the early years of our marriage, she suggested a gift that baffled me: a curio cabinet. And what made it worse was that she seemed to expect I would love the idea, like she anticipated I would get all mushy over the thought of such a lavish gift.

RELATED: To My Mother-in-Law, Thank You For Loving Me As a Daughter

Even though I was in my late twenties, I had to force my eyeballs from rolling in my head like a teenager. I had to stifle a laugh, or in my most cynical moments, refrain from making a gag-me gesture.

Seriously, a curio cabinet . . .

For what? My souvenir spoon collection? Or perhaps commemorative coins and porcelain thimbles?

But she was 100 percent serious, which blew my mind. In fact, a few years earlier she purchased a darker-wood model for my sister-in-law, a pricey gift for the new wife of her oldest son. And when we visited during the holidays, I marveled that someone my own age had knick-knacks and tchotchkes worthy of display on mirrored panels.

While my in-laws worked hard to welcome me into their fold, in those moments I felt like an alien in some antiquey alternate universe.

My own mother never had a curio. In fact, I don’t remember any of my aunts or even my great-aunts or grandmothers owning one.

RELATED: My Mother-in-Law’s Legacy: Simplicity

Plus, I consider myself a bit of a minimalist. I don’t check bags at the airport. I donate clothes as soon as my kids grow out of them. And I refuse to buy junk that would just clutter up my house.

In contrast, my mother-in-law’s collections went beyond standard bric-a-brac, she had baubles for every season.

Multiple times a year, this woman changed up her special cabinet. And you can bet she dusted it faithfully. It even held a position of prestige smack in her living room, visible as soon as you walked in the front door.

Though I always tried my best to be polite, I’m sure she clearly got the message that I did not want a curio of my very own. And after a couple of years, thankfully, she stopped asking.

But then life happened. I had kids and matured as one does when suddenly responsible for other humans. My mother-in-law was diagnosed with cancer and fought a hard, stunningly short battle that ended when she was only 59 years old. And just a few years after her gorgeous light flickered out, my father-in-law passed away too.

RELATED: Even Though You’re In Heaven, Your Grandchildren Will Know You

Clearing out the home they lived in for 30+ years was a Herculean task, and I can’t take credit for much of it. But as I wrapped up the heirloom dishes and Venetian glass in her precious curio, I felt her all around me. Despite the sadness and despair, I sensed her joy and wonder at watching all of her little treasures light up and reflect off the mirrors. And when my nephews were ready to haul to the curb that now empty, tall corner cabinet with beveled edges, with plans to leave it out for random strangers to collect, I suddenly couldn’t sit by and watch it happen.

Nobody wanted that curio.

Except for me, who scoffed at the very concept not that long ago.

Today my mother-in-law’s curio cabinet holds a place of prominence in my own living room, in full view of the kitchen table where I do all my writing. I don’t change it up as much as she did, and I certainly don’t dust it as often, but I do keep some of her delicate China teacups and a framed portrait of her on display at all times. Heck, I even threw in some souvenirs from my own travels, including a tiny painted boat from Malta and a snowglobe from Iceland.

And I can’t help but feel her love and warmth all around me whenever I look at it.

And I think . . . My sweet mother-in-law, you got me! You were right all along. Apparently, I did need a curio cabinet.

So God Made a Grandmother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Order Now!

curio cabinet Family in-laws legacy MIL mother in law

Jacqueline Miller

When not worrying about her teenagers, Jacqueline Miller is writing about them. Her recent work appears in Parents.com, HuffPost and The Christian Science Monitor. Follow her on Facebook and Instagram.

Farewell My Father: Walking the Trail of Beauty in Old Age

In: Grief

In his last years, Dad spent his days in a chair by the big picture window. From there, he could survey all the comings and goings of the ranch. He watched the weather, the dogs, and our Arabian stallion, Axum, galloping through the pines and calling to the mares across the hill. Occasionally, Dad would alert us that a certain dog had escaped or that a storm was coming in. He was looking out. He was keeping track. He needed help to move even a few steps. At night, my husband or I cleaned him, dressed him, and tucked him into...

Keep Reading

Sometimes Healing Doesn’t Look Like Moving On

In: Grief

Young woman holding red umbrella walking next to canola field

Outside, the sky hung in a thick, dim slab, like a ceiling over the trees that stood crooked in the wind. Not the fresh spring breeze we’re used to in Florida, but the damp, cold kind that makes you pull your coat together with tight fists. I got there right on time, parked in a front spot in the almost-bare lot, and slid my violet boots with fluffy pom-poms onto the asphalt. I braced for the impact of the frigid air and tucked my body inward as I did a little hop-jog into the pub. Once inside, I let out...

Keep Reading

Now that You’re Gone, I Sit In This Waiting Room Alone

In: Grief, Loss

I lay in bed this morning, sweet boy. It is Saturday. Seven of them since you left. Half awake, I turned over and saw Grief staring right at me. She pounced then stood, haughty, on my chest. I couldn’t breathe. She yelled that she would be close today. If she feels like it, she might even be relentless. She is cruel. You were the reason, sweet boy, for me to get out of bed on a Saturday morning. Actually, every morning you were my purpose from the moment I opened my eyes until the moment they shut. I knew on...

Keep Reading

She Was the Glue That Held Our Family Together

In: Grief

They say you don’t know what you have until it’s gone. I found that to be most true when my grandma passed. Like many grandmas, she was the best. She was kind and tender, but firm when she needed to be. She gave her time freely and used her baking talent to bless others. She had little and needed little, yet she had a way of drawing people together. There wasn’t a day I can remember when someone didn’t call her or stop by. She seemed to have all the answers and somehow knew how to fix almost any problem....

Keep Reading

My Parents Will Never See This Face

In: Grief

Woman with sunglasses shown in rear view mirror

You’ve had that moment, right? That moment when you don’t recognize the woman standing in front of you. Her hair is grayer. The skin around her eyes is a bit darker. Even without noticing the small details, that face is different. It’s aged. And as I stared at her yesterday afternoon, all dolled up and nowhere to go, it dawned on me: My parents will never see this version of me. My mom will never get to see hands that look like hers. She’ll never recognize the wrinkles or the sun spots. My father-in-law joked about gray hair with my...

Keep Reading

The Due Date that Never Comes

In: Grief, Loss, Miscarriage

It is not often talked about. I completely understand why, but when going through something so heartbreaking and devastating, women shouldn’t have to suffer alone or in silence. If you’ve gone through it, you probably already know what I’m referring to – miscarriage. It is the reason many couples don’t tell people they are expecting until after the first trimester. It is so unfortunately common that one in four women will experience a miscarriage in their lifetime. According to the National Institutes of Health, 15-20 percent of pregnancies will end in miscarriage, and it is the most common pregnancy complication...

Keep Reading

Repotting Myself: What My One‑Armed Grandpa Taught Me About Growing Anyway

In: Grief, Living

Black and white photo of older man in garden

I was never meant to be a plant person. I’m the woman who can kill a succulent on the way home from the store. Once, a fern sighed in my direction and gave up. That is my spiritual gift. My grandpa Dominic would have laughed—hard. He loved to laugh. And sing hymns passionately in Italian. He was an Italian immigrant who lost his arm working in a mill, and still, he woke up every morning and dressed like dignity itself. He shopped for my grandma. He fixed what was broken. And he tended the biggest, happiest garden you’ve ever seen....

Keep Reading

When I Look In the Mirror, I See My Mother

In: Grief

Woman with mother smiling in older photo

Recently, whenever I look in the mirror, I see a strong resemblance to my mother. People always said I looked like her, but I never really saw it until now. I think it may be because you always think of your parents as being older than you are. At the age of 61, I am now only two years away from the age my mother was when she died. The only good thing about dying young is that everyone will remember you that way. I have only known my mom as the vibrant, personable, and active woman she was. Well,...

Keep Reading

I Lost My Daughter on Mother’s Day: 3 Truths I’m Believing Today

In: Grief, Loss, Motherhood

Editor’s note: This post discusses child loss Child loss changes Mother’s Day. My 19-month-old, Julia, died suddenly on Mother’s Day in 2024. Three months later, her autopsy revealed she had B-cell Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia (B-ALL, also known as SUDNIC). Julia died a week after we did an embryo transfer at an IVF clinic in an attempt to have a second child. We found out three days after Julia’s death that the embryo did not make it either. Six months later, we did another embryo transfer that succeeded, and I now have an 8-month-old daughter, Lucy Mei (“Mei Mei” means “little...

Keep Reading

I Miss Having Parents

In: Grief

Grown daughter posing between smiling parents

I have been living with the ache of loss for so long that I truly don’t remember what it feels like not to carry it. Sometimes it rests quietly beneath my ribs, dormant and almost polite. Other times it rises without warning—on an ordinary Tuesday afternoon, in the middle of a coffee line—and cuts straight through me. Today, it was a song. I was waiting for my coffee when “Pictures of You” by The Cure drifted through the café speakers. I hadn’t heard it in 20 years. In my twenties, it meant heartbreak—young love unraveling, relationships ending before they were...

Keep Reading

The Peace of Having Faith Like a Child

Faith

The Peace of Having Faith Like a Child

Beauty From Ashes: Adoption Through Foster Care

Kids

I Never Wanted My Mother-in-Law’s Curio Cabinet

RELATED: To My Mother-in-Law, Thank You For Loving Me As a Daughter

Seriously, a curio cabinet . . .

RELATED: My Mother-in-Law’s Legacy: Simplicity

In contrast, my mother-in-law’s collections went beyond standard bric-a-brac, she had baubles for every season.

RELATED: Even Though You’re In Heaven, Your Grandchildren Will Know You

Except for me, who scoffed at the very concept not that long ago.

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Jacqueline Miller

Farewell My Father: Walking the Trail of Beauty in Old Age

Sometimes Healing Doesn’t Look Like Moving On

Now that You’re Gone, I Sit In This Waiting Room Alone

She Was the Glue That Held Our Family Together

My Parents Will Never See This Face

The Due Date that Never Comes

Repotting Myself: What My One‑Armed Grandpa Taught Me About Growing Anyway

When I Look In the Mirror, I See My Mother

I Lost My Daughter on Mother’s Day: 3 Truths I’m Believing Today

I Miss Having Parents

Get It Now

So God Made a Mother

I Never Wanted My Mother-in-Law’s Curio Cabinet

Seriously, a curio cabinet . . .

In contrast, my mother-in-law’s collections went beyond standard bric-a-brac, she had baubles for every season.

Except for me, who scoffed at the very concept not that long ago.

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Farewell My Father: Walking the Trail of Beauty in Old Age

Sometimes Healing Doesn’t Look Like Moving On

Now that You’re Gone, I Sit In This Waiting Room Alone

She Was the Glue That Held Our Family Together

My Parents Will Never See This Face

The Due Date that Never Comes

Repotting Myself: What My One‑Armed Grandpa Taught Me About Growing Anyway

When I Look In the Mirror, I See My Mother

I Lost My Daughter on Mother’s Day: 3 Truths I’m Believing Today

I Miss Having Parents

Previous Post

Next Post

You May Also Like