By Krystal Sieben 
I believe moms who have a hard time speaking up for themselves as girls get daughters who have no problem speaking up. Daughters who might even be a little too comfortable using their voice (in the best possible way). At least, this is the case for me.
My daughter is bold, kind, strong, tough, brave, and confident. Maybe I was like this too when I was seven. I’d like to think I was, but the world has a way of putting a lid on girls like this. At least it did for me.
I was a girl who wanted to be “good.” And I interpreted from the world around me that being “good” meant making other people comfortable—even at my expense.
Grandpa makes a rude comment about your weight at family Christmas . . . just offer a smile. Parents divorce and can’t get along . . . be as accommodating to everyone as possible—even into adulthood. Dealing with mean girls in adulthood . . . just keep trying. Do something nice for them. Do what they want. They’ll come around.
One simple question (now) flips the script on the above scenarios and many, many more: Is this what I’d want for my daughter?
When I look back at so many situations when I stayed quiet and stayed good to make everyone else comfortable—and I think of my daughter doing that—it absolutely kills me. To picture her spark going out each time she kept it all in and took it. Each time she let something happen to her that was wrong, her little strong self diminishing with each moment. It’s enough to absolutely change everything about how I move in this world.
People commenting on bodies . . . “Oops! We actually don’t talk about bodies in our house.” (And don’t worry about coming back. Ever.)
Adults not allowing kids to be the kid in grown-up scenarios . . . “Hmm. Let’s figure out a way to prioritize the child in this situation. We can work to find what’s best for her.”
Mean girls? Ever again? No quotes, because I’m already gone. There are so many kind and amazing women to be with—they’re everywhere. Say a prayer and start looking. You’ll find ’em.
My daughter changed everything. She is the voice in my heart that’s always been there; I just didn’t listen. Now, I couldn’t tune out her perfect laugh and her imperfect “R” at the end of her words if I tried. It’s the best voice I’ve ever known.
God, thank you for giving me a daughter.
by Brea Schmidt 
by Samantha Krieger 
