So God Made a Mother Collection ➔

Before I had my son I was proud of you. We were a comfortable, on-the-small-size of a 34C. You were perky still, not touched by the long night nursing sessions. The little sleep powered sessions of nursing that brought me the realization that something so hard and challenging could be so rewarding. So life changing.

We used to shop at the sexy lingerie stores, ready to sex you up in lacey prints for a fun night with your man. The sleek, smooth pre-baby cleavage has turned into a wrinkly, overlapping ripple of some kind. Now, there’s no going back. Not after my offspring have survived by suckling on you bad boys. Foreplay becomes a formality. Libido becomes a choice. Sexiness used to be easy for you.

The hours spent pumping. Oh the pumping. I never thought something so supple could make me feel like a cow being herded to the stock yard. The pain of suction on your once pink nipples, now discolored. You used to sit straight and when you played peek-a-book through my shirt, we teased our lover. Now, my onlooker tilts his head, curious at how cock-eyed you’ve become from breastfeeding.

On the outside, life looks like it has left you. On my inside I feel like life has left you. Deflated. That’s what we are.

When I just couldn’t take it anymore on the little sleep that was needed of me to bring you out to soothe the cry of my baby, I decided to give you a break. Thank God for the bottle. Thank God for formula. Thank God someone else could feed little one so we could have a break. A break we would feel in the morning. Those deflated breasts now turned into full, prickly painful, heavy breasts screaming for release.

We had our ups and downs for a year. We had our pep talks to get through the sleepless nights. We cried from the pain of learning to help baby latch. We cried from the pain of what it felt like when that life-giving milk decided to flow through you for the first time. We forced ourselves to feel sexy again.

We also had the most eye opening experience when baby nursed for the first time. The gentle tug and swallow we felt. The release of hormones that washes over is something we will never forget. All the selfish feelings I had for you are a foggy, distant memory. The empowering and daunting feeling of knowing that you are the only one who can bring life to baby. 

Now that I have you back to myself, I am honestly not sure what to do with you. Lingerie seems phony. Underwire seems like a nightmare. One thing I do know is this: the now fullness of a 34C that was once barely full brings me pride in a way I never knew existed. That is something we would never trade to be “perky” again.

I am stronger woman now than I ever was.

Gloryanna Boge

Gloryanna is a teacher turned SAHM whose identity is found in her relationship with Christ. She is married to her high school sweetheart who insists that dirty clothes can be left on the floor. Gloryanna writes to encourage others in their walk with Christ, no matter what season you're going through. If you want to be encouraged, you can follow her writing at http://www.gloryannaboge.com/. You can also catch snippets of her faith and scribbles on Twitter - https://twitter.com/gloryannaboge Facebook - https://https://www.facebook.com/gloryannabogewriterand Instagram - hhttps://www.instagram.com/gloryannaboge_writer/a>

I’m the Quiet Mom

In: Living, Motherhood
Mother holding baby, smiling, black-and-white photo

I’m the quiet mom. The shy mom. The highly introverted mom. The mom who doesn’t do very well in social situations. The mom who tries to be social but usually comes off as a little awkward. I don’t overly like this about myself. But it’s who I am. I could try to change this about myself. I could try to be the outgoing mom. The social mom. The loud and extroverted mom. And I have tried. However, completely changing who a person is at heart is not something that can be easily done. Complete change is also very unlikely to...

Keep Reading

These Are the Sick Years

In: Kids, Motherhood
Mom kissing head of sick toddler

I’m still in the trenches of toddlerhood, and yet, I already know I will look back on my daughter’s preschool years with affection for what it is: sweet, fun, curious, and undeniably precious. What I won’t miss about this stage is that it’s germy. SO germy. The preschool years bring endless crud into our home. Crud that is heartbreaking when your beloved child’s body is working hard to fight it off, but that also works its way into other bodies. The adults in the home who have jobs and responsibilities, run the entire household and have just endured the emotional...

Keep Reading

One Day You’ll Have Big Girl Tears, So I’ll Hold You Today

In: Motherhood
Mother holding infant daughter, color photo

Your little eyes are swollen tonight from crying, but I know how to comfort you. I hold you close, hum one of your favorite songs, and nurse the pain away until your breathing slows. Tonight, your tears are from teething pains and being overly tired, but I know one day, probably in a future that will come faster than I can anticipate, they’ll be swollen for big girl reasons. Fights with friends, heartbreak, championship losses, homework stress, the inevitable mother-daughter arguments.  I hope in those times I will know the ways to comfort you, that I can still ease some...

Keep Reading

You’re Not a Bad Mom, You’re a Work in Progress

In: Motherhood
Mom hugging child

I’m kind of hard on myself as a mom. In fact, most days if I were to grade myself on some sort of official motherhood report card, I think I’d give myself a “Needs Improvement,” which isn’t all bad. Nobody’s perfect, and the idea of working on being a better mom is great—important even—but I’m realizing more and more that when I see myself as a mom, I tend to focus on the bad. The things that need improving. All the little mistakes add up, and overall, I end up feeling like a bad mom. Nobody tells me this. It’s...

Keep Reading

I’m Giving My Kids the Summer Fun I Never Had

In: Kids, Motherhood
Two boys playing in the waves on the beach, color photo

I love that my kids hate school. Stay with me here . . . Yes, I absolutely love that year after year, my boys cannot wait to ditch school for summer break, that they endlessly bemoan the academic year and cannot wait for June.  I love it because it is normal. I love it because it means they enjoy being at home and implies that I make summers fun for them, or, rather, allow summers to be fun for them. I love it because I always dreaded summers when I was growing up. Dreaded them with knots in my stomach...

Keep Reading

I Would Relive Every Moment of Sorrow Just To Hold You

In: Baby, Motherhood
Mother holding infant, black-and-white photo

As I sat there rocking my child to sleep, I caught my mind wandering to the past. Not my recent past but my before . . . Before my son was born. Before my stressful pregnancy. Before my positive pregnancy test. Before . . . when I was praying every day for a miracle—six years back. Infertility is a messy journey that few (and many at the same time) are chosen to take. It’s lonely and heartbreaking and dark and will make you hate yourself at times. You feel helplessness and anger and despair. RELATED: This is Infertility Your relationships...

Keep Reading

So God Made a Mother With a Willing Heart

In: Motherhood
Mother and daughter smiling, color photo

You may have heard it said that God only gives special children to special parents.   But, when God made the mother of a child who has special needs, the Lord did not need a special mother, the Lord needed a mother who was willing. God needed a woman who would say yes to an assignment that many choose not to accept. The Lord knew she wouldn’t feel qualified to raise a child with special needs, but that didn’t matter because God would equip her every step of the way. Since there is no such thing as a perfect mother,...

Keep Reading

Mothering One Day at a Time

In: Kids, Motherhood
Mother holding daughter in matching shirts, color photo

As I sat with my growing belly, full of anticipation for the arrival of my firstborn, the possibilities were endless for this little girl. Maybe she would lean toward the arts and be a dancer, writer, or musician. Or maybe she would take after her great-granddad and become a scientist. And maybe one day she would be a mother too. Dreaming about the future was fun and exciting. But then she surprised us with an at-birth Down syndrome diagnosis. Special needs were never included in my dreaming sessions.    All of the sudden, my hopes and dreams for this new...

Keep Reading

Fall into the Arms of Jesus, Little One

In: Faith, Kids, Motherhood
Child walking

I have three younger brothers, so I know how crazy and wild boys can be. Lots of falls, cuts, scrapes, bruises, broken bones, and even a couple of head stitches. My husband has two younger brothers. He’d always tell how they used to jump from the banister down two floors onto the glass coffee table. Why anyone would do that, I have no idea. Pure madness and chaos.  Right now, I have a little baby boy who’s only seven months, but I know he will probably be just as wild as his uncles and dad. But that doesn’t mean I’m...

Keep Reading

You Don’t Have to Lose Yourself to Be a Good Mom

In: Living, Motherhood
Woman brushing wet hair

There is nothing wrong with losing yourself in motherhood. Diving in head first, serving your kids and spouse endlessly, never asking for a break, being proud for providing an amazing childhood for your kids, and allowing mom to become your entire identity. But what if you don’t want that?  When did this become the standard of motherhood we are all expected to achieve? Why does society say the best mom is the one that’s 110% physically and emotionally available for her kids all the time and never does anything for herself? Why are you less of a mom if you...

Keep Reading

5 Secrets to the

BEST Summer Ever!

FREE EMAIL BONUS

Creating simple summer memories

with your kids that will  last a lifetime