During the month of November, we hear a lot about adoption. Later this month, on National Adoption Day (November 22), thousands will go to the courthouse and legally grow their family. Adoption can be a beautiful thing. It’s how we chose to grow our family. Without adoption, we wouldn’t have our kids. But we didn’t just get our kids; we got so much more! We care tremendously for our kids’ first families. The ones we know & love and the ones who wish to be unknown.

Getting a call to let you know you’re bringing home a baby in 24 hours is incredible. An instant high. The adrenaline kicks in. Somehow everything falls into place. All your dreams are coming true. As you stare at the sweet baby placed in your arms, you forget everything and your heart fills with love. At least that’s how it was for me. But then you remember.

If I’m bringing home a baby, someone else isn’t.

If my family is growing, another is being torn apart.

My gain is someone else’s loss.

While adoption can be beautiful, it starts as a loss. A loss for that child; losing everything they ever knew. A loss for the first family; saying goodbye to that precious life they created. A heartbreaking loss. The kind of loss that causes physical pain. Watching a mom say goodbye to her newborn baby is something I will never forget. The image is permanently etched in my mind. So many sobs, tears & breaths so deep that she’s barely breathing. Until she goes numb. Just a shell of who she is.

Adoption has given us our happily ever after… but what about the other side of it? Later this month, we plan to share several stories of the different sides of adoption. Stories of love, loss, heartbreak & hope.

Alissa Kay

Alissa was born and raised in the Midwest and currently calls Wisconsin home. She's happily married to her college sweetheart and she's living out her dreams of being a stay-at-home mom. Although, let's be real, she's hardly ever home. She's the mom to 3 kids who all came to her via adoption. A boy (8) and 2 girls (6 and almost 4!). The kids keep her plenty busy, but when she has free time she enjoys a night out with friends or curling up with a good book.