A Gift for Mom! 🤍

It seems like just yesterday when the alarm would go off at 6 a.m., I’d roll out of bed and throw my hair up in my favorite scrunchie, slip on my oversized t-shirt and head off to school. I toted a Jansport backpack and a slew of friendship bracelets and shell necklaces were my favorite accessories. A little Caramex balm on my lips and I was out.

Ah, memories.

Except this is the exact same look I see on my three teen daughters every morning as they sit across from me at the kitchen counter.

Enter the age of the VSCO (pronounced “visco”) girl, also known as my teenage years rebooted.

If you are not living with a tween or teen whose sticker-covered Hydro Flask has dented your floors (And I oop), you may not know what this VSCO stuff is. Basically, take every 90s trend you can think of and put it on one modern teenager—except spiral perms and big bangs which have not made an appearance . . . yet.

VSCO is actually a photo editing app used predominantly to create a consistent social media aesthetic, but is now used in a more generalized manner to describe teen girls who post pictures and videos on Insta and TikTok with their eco-conscious metal straws and birkenstocks.

And scrunchies. So many scrunchies.

These VSCO girls work hard for an effortless, laid-back, beachy look that my mom coined in the 90s as sloppy.

“Please, can you just tuck your shirt in,” my mother would beg as she watched me go out the door in my favorite gigantic t-shirt and jean shorts, extra scrunchies on each wrist.

“But mom, this is how everyone dresses,” I would yell back over my shoulder.

And it was.

Which is ironic considering how much flack today’s VSCO-obsessed young girls are getting. In fact, there is an entire subculture dedicated to mocking these young females all over the internet. Even their scrunchies.

When I explain to my girls that their cutting-edge looks were also my fashion staples, I get a “sksksksksksk” which is VSCO code for laughing at something dumb.

But truth be told, I love it. My daughter gets her scrunchies at the corner drugstore, just like I did.

For most adults, however, like any teenage trend since the dawn of time, it’s driving them mad. Some are talking about the pervasive costs associated with the high-end brands these teens covet and others are discussing the promotion of lesbian culture and still others are stating how it is a front for organizations focused on climate change.

Critics claim VSCO is synonymous with basic and boring, and the girls following this culture are more concerned with getting the right photo than any cause they may be promoting.

And just like all the teenage girls coming before them, they can’t win no matter how hard they try.

For most of these girls, whether they want to be VSCO or not, they are just capitalizing on what’s hot at the moment. I mean, where would we be if we didn’t have teenagers to tell us what is cool, even if it’s what their moms used to wear?

But this VSCO mom sees it differently. As I watch my daughters and her friends take the perfect selfies with just the right backdrop, it’s the ever-present quest of a teenage girl trying to find out who she is while desperately seeking to fit in.

I may not wear my scrunchies anymore, but I remember that feeling well.

You may also like:

Why I Loved Being a Teen in the 90s

8 Ways To Tell You’re A Kid From The 90s (And Now We Feel Old)

      

So God Made a Grandmother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Order Now!

Whitney Fleming

Whitney is a mom of three teen daughters, a freelance writer, and co-partner of the site parentingteensandtweens.com You can find her on Facebook at WhitneyFlemingWrites.

I Finally Admitted I Didn’t Want To Be a SAHM Anymore

In: Motherhood
Mother and child silhouette

For most of my life, I believed becoming a stay-at-home mom wasn’t just a choice, it was the ultimate goal. The kind of life a “good” woman was meant to want. The kind of life that meant you were doing things right. I grew up surrounded by that message. In conservative spaces, in church circles, in subtle conversations about what a “real” mother looked like. Women who stayed home were praised. Women who didn’t were quietly questioned. I learned, without ever being directly told, that a mother’s highest purpose was to center her entire world around her children and her...

Keep Reading

I’m Not Really Sure How To Do This Teenager Thing

In: Motherhood, Teen
Teenager on phone

I was not prepared to be a mother of teenagers. Sure, I was warned by other parents about the difficult journey I was about to embark on, but I did not expect it to be this challenging. I remember these two sweet, innocent children who wanted to be with me all the time. Now they barely give me the time of day. How did we get here? Like many parents, we long to have that child who once, a long time ago, called us Mommy and Daddy and begged us to read them another story. Where are those kids I...

Keep Reading

Why Don’t We Talk About Jonah’s Mother?

In: Faith, Living, Motherhood
Woman standing over water

Praying for My Son Send a storm to stop him; Let his friends throw him out. May he drop to the deeps, But gently, please, Stubborn though he may be. If it could only take three days, How my mother’s heart would Rejoice in praise.  From the hell you allow him, Let him cry to you. Is not Nineveh and mercy Exactly what he knows He needs— A mercy on enemies He fears You will concede? Please let all the shade wither If his is an angry soul; Humble him and help him follow Where you would have his purpose...

Keep Reading

To the Mom Worrying She’s Not Doing Enough This Summer

In: Motherhood
Kids looking at lake in summer

It’s only the second week of summer, and, thanks to modern-day social media, I feel like I’ve already seen it all. Picture-perfect beach getaways, color-coded bucket lists, backyard neighborhood movie nights, you name it. And if I’m being honest, I’ve already caught myself wondering if I’m doing enough. More than once, at that. As a solo mom of two, I’m still adjusting to our new norm while trying desperately to delicately let go of any expectations tied to all of our past experiences…including summer vacations. I’m reminding myself that our summers won’t look like they used to. At least not...

Keep Reading

Your Worth As a Mother Is Not Defined By How You Feed Your Baby

In: Baby, Motherhood
Mother and baby stand by crib

I’m not breastfeeding my baby. I wanted to. And I was able to for the first several weeks of her life. But as the days went on, I could tell it wasn’t enough for her anymore, so we started supplementing. And sure enough, without warning, she began screaming through nursing sessions, but was satisfied with a bottle. And that’s when I knew what I needed to do. A similar situation also happened with my first. She didn’t gain her birth weight back on my milk alone, so I had no choice but to supplement right away. And before I knew...

Keep Reading

A Mother’s Love Doesn’t End When Her Kids Move Out

In: Motherhood
Family posing in Time Square

When my last sibling moved out of the house, I watched my mom struggle in a quiet, almost unspoken way. It wasn’t something dramatic or visible; it was something I could feel in her presence. For 40 years, her life had revolved around taking care of us—my siblings and me. Every season of her life had been shaped around our needs, our schedules, our milestones, and our growing up. Being a mom wasn’t just something she did. It was who she was—the structure of her days, the cadence of her thoughts, and the center of her purpose. So when the...

Keep Reading

The Hardest Part of Divorce Is Being Away from My Kids

In: Living, Marriage, Motherhood
Woman in driver's seat

I’ve written several times about how divorce has allowed me to find myself again, and how that version is even better than the one I was before I was married. All of that is still true. I am happier than I’ve ever been. More confident and sure of myself. I understand my emotions and how to handle myself when things get tough or scary. I am more grounded and calm than I’ve ever been. Truly, I have come out on top. I’ve received comments about how happy I look, how I’m “living my best life with kids only half the...

Keep Reading

I May Let Go of the Baby Things, but I’ll Hold the Memories Forever

In: Baby, Motherhood
Woman looking through closet of baby items

It’s easy to think of multiple sayings and mottos about how invaluable earthly possessions are. “It’s not what you have, but who you share it with” “Worry less about things and more about experiences” “Who cares what you have, you can’t take it with you when you go” And trust me, I know these to be true. I am not a hoarder of hotel pens or mini shampoo bottles or every receipt and coaster from my favorite restaurants. I don’t care much for name-brand shoes or designer purses, yet there are a few things I just can’t easily let go...

Keep Reading

Mom Showed Us Love that Lasts

In: Motherhood
Vintage photo of mother and three young kids

We moved a few years ago, and we had a closet that needed some reworking. In doing so, my husband found some old photos. He pulled out an album that held this vintage photo of my mom, my sisters, and me. It was probably circa 1983 when prints were made from Kodak. I actually don’t remember seeing the photo before. But I love it. In the photo, my mother’s eyes are shut with a blink because those were the days when blinks weren’t edited. It’s beautiful, and I can’t stop thinking about the captured connection. She was showing us something...

Keep Reading

This Is How I’m Raising My Sensitive Son

In: Motherhood
Little boy hugs a cat

When I was pregnant with my son, everyone warned me of what was to come. “Just you wait,” they’d say with an underlying schadenfreude, “you’ll never sleep again.” I fully expected sleep-deprived days and long, unrelenting nights, calming my son down from tantrums, trying to keep the peace with my marriage. But I got lucky—my son sleeps through the night, doesn’t throw tantrums, and my marriage is stronger than ever. I didn’t expect that, especially because I struggle with my own mental health and assumed I’d be in the weeds during my postpartum period. Now that my son is almost...

Keep Reading