The Sweetest Mother's Day Gift!

It seems like just yesterday when the alarm would go off at 6 a.m., I’d roll out of bed and throw my hair up in my favorite scrunchie, slip on my oversized t-shirt and head off to school. I toted a Jansport backpack and a slew of friendship bracelets and shell necklaces were my favorite accessories. A little Caramex balm on my lips and I was out.

Ah, memories.

Except this is the exact same look I see on my three teen daughters every morning as they sit across from me at the kitchen counter.

Enter the age of the VSCO (pronounced “visco”) girl, also known as my teenage years rebooted.

If you are not living with a tween or teen whose sticker-covered Hydro Flask has dented your floors (And I oop), you may not know what this VSCO stuff is. Basically, take every 90s trend you can think of and put it on one modern teenager—except spiral perms and big bangs which have not made an appearance . . . yet.

VSCO is actually a photo editing app used predominantly to create a consistent social media aesthetic, but is now used in a more generalized manner to describe teen girls who post pictures and videos on Insta and TikTok with their eco-conscious metal straws and birkenstocks.

And scrunchies. So many scrunchies.

These VSCO girls work hard for an effortless, laid-back, beachy look that my mom coined in the 90s as sloppy.

“Please, can you just tuck your shirt in,” my mother would beg as she watched me go out the door in my favorite gigantic t-shirt and jean shorts, extra scrunchies on each wrist.

“But mom, this is how everyone dresses,” I would yell back over my shoulder.

And it was.

Which is ironic considering how much flack today’s VSCO-obsessed young girls are getting. In fact, there is an entire subculture dedicated to mocking these young females all over the internet. Even their scrunchies.

When I explain to my girls that their cutting-edge looks were also my fashion staples, I get a “sksksksksksk” which is VSCO code for laughing at something dumb.

But truth be told, I love it. My daughter gets her scrunchies at the corner drugstore, just like I did.

For most adults, however, like any teenage trend since the dawn of time, it’s driving them mad. Some are talking about the pervasive costs associated with the high-end brands these teens covet and others are discussing the promotion of lesbian culture and still others are stating how it is a front for organizations focused on climate change.

Critics claim VSCO is synonymous with basic and boring, and the girls following this culture are more concerned with getting the right photo than any cause they may be promoting.

And just like all the teenage girls coming before them, they can’t win no matter how hard they try.

For most of these girls, whether they want to be VSCO or not, they are just capitalizing on what’s hot at the moment. I mean, where would we be if we didn’t have teenagers to tell us what is cool, even if it’s what their moms used to wear?

But this VSCO mom sees it differently. As I watch my daughters and her friends take the perfect selfies with just the right backdrop, it’s the ever-present quest of a teenage girl trying to find out who she is while desperately seeking to fit in.

I may not wear my scrunchies anymore, but I remember that feeling well.

You may also like:

Why I Loved Being a Teen in the 90s

8 Ways To Tell You’re A Kid From The 90s (And Now We Feel Old)

      

So God Made a Grandmother book by Leslie Means

If you liked this, you'll love our book, SO GOD MADE A GRANDMA

Order Now!

Whitney Fleming

Whitney is a mom of three teen daughters, a freelance writer, and co-partner of the site parentingteensandtweens.com You can find her on Facebook at WhitneyFlemingWrites.

I Lost My Daughter on Mother’s Day: 3 Truths I’m Believing Today

In: Grief, Loss, Motherhood
Woman and young daughter smiling

Editor’s note: This post discusses child loss Child loss changes Mother’s Day. My 19-month-old, Julia, died suddenly on Mother’s Day in 2024. Three months later, her autopsy revealed she had B-cell Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia (B-ALL, also known as SUDNIC). Julia died a week after we did an embryo transfer at an IVF clinic in an attempt to have a second child. We found out three days after Julia’s death that the embryo did not make it either. Six months later, we did another embryo transfer that succeeded, and I now have an 8-month-old daughter, Lucy Mei (“Mei Mei” means “little...

Keep Reading

If You Give a Mom a Bouquet…

In: Motherhood
Woman arranging bouquet of pink flowers on table

If you give a mom a bouquet… She goes to grab a vase to put it in. As she grabs the vase, she also grabs the duster because she knows the spot for the vase is probably dusty and she has guests coming for dinner. As she begins dusting, she notices the stack of books that needs to go back on the shelf. When she gets to the shelf, she sees the bendy action figures in battle formation that need to go back in the bin. When she gets to the bin, she spots the toy food that needs to...

Keep Reading

Here In the Liminal Space of Parenting

In: Motherhood
Woman in tunnel

It’s Friday night at 8:00. The intermittent snoring of an 80-pound lap dog is the only thing slicing through the silence of my home. It feels empty, and there is a stillness in the air. I have nowhere to be; there is nobody waiting to be picked up. I’m staring at the empty takeout boxes from dinner sitting on the coffee table. There was no need to cook a big meal; it was just the two of us, my husband and me, sitting together wistfully in this liminal space of parenting. It is the quiet place between an empty nest...

Keep Reading

Mothers Are the Givers

In: Motherhood
Mom embracing young daughter

As we were decorating the tree last Christmas, my son dug to the bottom of a box and pulled out a Snoopy ornament. He set it off to the side quickly and continued his rifling. But I noticed the faint crack along the red jukebox that Snoopy stood beside. In an instant, I was standing back in the kitchen of our first home watching my son wander in to ask, in the cutest toddler voice, if he could “pwess” the button on the ornament to play the music. With gleeful excitement, he pressed too hard. The ornament slipped from his...

Keep Reading

Hyperemesis Gravidarum Means I Survived Something No One Could See

In: Motherhood
Pregnant woman lying on couch with hand on forehead

My hands were trembling as I reached for the pregnancy test developing on the bathroom counter. It had been three months since we lost our second pregnancy to miscarriage, and I was cautiously optimistic that this was our month. My heart tried to leap out of my chest when I saw the two lines. Our rainbow baby had been conceived. Let me preface the rest of this story by saying I knew my pregnancy wouldn’t be magical. My pregnancy with my son, who was 22 months old at the time, hadn’t been, and the short weeks leading up to my...

Keep Reading

I’m Learning To Feel Like I Belong In a Room Because I Want Her To Know She Always Does

In: Living, Motherhood
Little girl looking in the mirror

It took me 39 years to like myself. I mean really, honestly look in the mirror and say, “You go, girl.” I understand the concept of progress, not perfection, but the idea of always working on myself became a tiring and unrelenting objective. Here I was shrinking that waist, smoothing my skin, studying hard, working way too late, and often burning the candle at both ends to yield results that were still less than the ideal. It’s all well and good to be a doer who sets reasonable and sometimes unreasonable goals, but throughout my teens and into my early...

Keep Reading

Soon There Will Be No More Breakfasts To Make

In: Grown Children, Motherhood, Teen
Ten boy eating breakfast at kitchen counter

T-minus 44 days until a new beginning- Math has never been my strong suit or my favorite subject, but it will be about 19 years spent rising and trying to shine in our house. Nineteen years of prepping one, two, or all three of our sons to get up and ready for school. Nineteen years of making breakfast. Nineteen years of making lunches. For those of you in the thick of it right now, you know exactly what I mean. I think my husband Steve and I have it down to a science now. If we had to do it...

Keep Reading

I’m Going to Tell You the Things Your Mom Should Have Told You

In: Living, Motherhood
Mother with three grown daughters

During my oldest daughter’s freshman year of college, I started being haunted by a recurring dream of an old-fashioned suitcase—one of those hard-sided ones that’s as big as they come. In the dream, when I open the suitcase, it’s overflowing with clothing, shoes, and all kinds of stuff that belongs to me and each of my three daughters. Everything in the suitcase is all jumbled together. Nobody else in the dream is worried about sorting through everything, but I am totally stressed about it. To top it all off, I have to deal with this suitcase while preparing for a...

Keep Reading

The Half-Dressed Mom and Love in the Details

In: Motherhood
Woman sitting with coffee cup and book on bed

I am a proper mom. Not fancy, not prim—practical. I am dressed for the time of day, always. That is simply who I am. Except for this morning. This morning I was in a towel, bracing the bathroom counter, writhing in pain, and trying not to scream loud enough to disturb the neighbors. I had seen a specialist just the day before. He’d said I needed six weeks to heal before they could do further exploration. What he hadn’t said—what I hadn’t understood—was how much the healing itself would hurt. My 23-year-old daughter, Aislyn, found me like that. Panicked. Half-dressed....

Keep Reading

Mommy, Will You Play With Me?

In: Kids, Motherhood
Boy sitting in middle of toys smiling

With four kids at three different schools, our days are full. Between sports practices, music lessons, clubs, rehearsals, games, meets, and playdates, it feels like we’re constantly heading somewhere. I love that my children are involved in activities, but occasionally, it’s nice to have some downtime. When I get a text or email that a practice has been canceled, it’s usually a huge relief. Last week, after-school sports were cancelled due to heavy rain. When I picked up my youngest son from school, I told him we’d be going straight home for the rest of the afternoon. He looked surprised....

Keep Reading